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Thu 9 Aug, 2007 08:07 am
Do we generally devalue acquaintances, because we compare them inappropriately to the significant others in our lives? Should we not value acquaintances in their own right (i.e., the supermarket check-out person, bus driver, post office window clerk, etc., etc.) Shouldn't they have their own place of significance in the life movie in our minds?
Do we need a national acquaintance week? Are we treating a potentially meaningful part of our lives flippantly?
Must we turn acquaintances into "friends" to learn to value knowing them?
Who is we? I've been friends with two of our post office deliverers (a mailman and a mailwoman) over the years; am presently into talking at length with the cashier guy at my favorite market in my new city. Used to have philosophic conversations with the vegetable guy at my old co-op. Perhaps I have lived in a less stratified society than you have.
I believe many people don't interact with acquaintances in a meaningful social way. If you do, that's nice, but I don't believe that's the general rule in today's society, at least in urban situations.
In our busy day-to-day activities, there's simply no time to have a meaningful relationship with everyone we encounter. Besides, the lady at the grocery store has rung up dozens of people already today before you even came through the door. Hundreds since you were in the store last. Is she supposed to remember you?
Yeah, what does "meaningful" mean, exactly? Heartfelt smiles, sure. An avoidance of being rude, yup. But I don't think you can expect to spend as much time or energy on acquaintances as friends -- that's pretty much what divides the two. (Is this someone I like enough to spend significant time and energy on him or her? Yes? That's a friend. No? That's an acquaintance.)
My point is, yes, we don't treat acquaintances like we treat friends. We don't go to the movies, usually, with acquaintances, for example. But acquaintances do remember us as their acquaintances, and we should not only think of friends as the people in our lives worth anything. Acquaintances are people too. Acquaintances are the stage scenery to the daily story in our minds. Without them we have a bare stage.
Foofie wrote:My point is, yes, we don't treat acquaintances like we treat friends. We don't go to the movies, usually, with acquaintances, for example. But acquaintances do remember us as their acquaintances, and we should not only think of friends as the people in our lives worth anything. Acquaintances are people too. Acquaintances are the stage scenery to the daily story in our minds. Without them we have a bare stage.
If this is your line of reasoning then what about total strangers? Strangers are people too! And there are a lot more of them! Heck, I have maybe 20 or 30 friends, maybe 100-200 aquaintenaces... That still leaves a few billion people as strangers.
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