Hi there CoastalRat,
Thank you for your frank and to the point comments.
They are all things that I have said to myself as well and to him, of which he has no real comment apart from admitting he has a problem. I know the ball is in my court and the jury is out, as I want to understand why? Perhaps it is an unrealistic expectation and will clarity make a difference to my ultimate decision? Probably not.
What I take from your comments is that:
1. He does not love me
2. Admition means he will eventually do it again
I am not naive, yet I know humans make mistakes, we are not perfect and there is no perfect relationship, they require communication, openness and effort from both parties.
Like I have mentioned I am seeking the' why ' from someone who has been there and done that and can articulate the physic behind it.
Thank you for your comments they are appreciated.