THE BRITISH THREAD II

Spendius Said:- You need a very great deal of advice DP


Listen mate! and you Mac..

I have previously mentioned all this grammar and spelling correction on these pages, usually aimed at me.

If this is the best you can fill your time with, you need to get your balls off the floor and live.

If you sit there like a pair of King Charles Cocker Spaniels with your pricks in your mits wanking off after you have corrected some errors, feeling chuffed with yourselves, you're really sad bastards!

Spendi, we don't give a monkey **** what anybody else thinks, you posh naff, golf playing tosser! Anybody running their lives around what the neighbours think is a gibbon cock sucking bastard. On another level, I'd detach heads from shoulders for comments like that.

Dorothy, in your opinions may have made an error, so what! She has a life besides filling in on here, it's always nice to see her and I couldn't give a toss if her grammar, spelling or anything else is perfect or otherwise.

Stop trying to be clever with the girl, it annoys me, and an annoyed Mathos could be your worst nightmare!

Yeah!

BLOODY HELL!
Do you know what I just realised?
It doesn't matter if I scrounge all your taxes to pay for my degree, because when I come out at the end of it and get a job I'm gonna be taxed to buggery!
I am no longer going to feel guilty about this issue. I am going to scrounge all that I can while I have the oppertuinity.

May as well PQ. Every other fuc*ker does.

"Taxed to buggery" I like it.

But back onto the topic of the moment- which seems to be Dorothy's typing errors:

Maybe McT and spendius should let a few typos escape their notice. I make them all the time.

I don't think spendius is boring. He is of the older generation, so is bound to have different opinions, which when I manage to understand what he is saying, I usually find interesting.
Here is a very good example:



This is an interesting issue. It's really easy to be big-headed about your grades. I for one am a prime example. It's my come-back to everything. Unfortunately, in the real world no-one claps you on the back every time you get a good test result, or gives you a sticker when you do something well. If you can't get someone to pay you to do it, then it is of little value. This point sucks, majorly. I think this is a reason why it's important to have a part time job. It's the exact opposite of education- instead of rewarding you when you do well they curse you when you do something wrong, and anything you do do well is 'as expected.'

Anyway, I'm rambling a little bit now.


It's good to try and see where other people come from, so to speak. I think we all need to learn about other people. Even if they are not to our tastes. It's a tool you need to get through life.

Well I still think he's boring.

And I am delighted that you do. If I thought you found me interesting I would go see an expert in order to do something about it.

Mathos, my leetle dwarling,

I never mentioned anybody's typos or grammatical errors. You must have a comprehension problem. I never do. I challenge you to find an example of me doing it. If you can't, and I know you can't, it looks as if you are inventing your own "fish in a barrel".

I disagreed with a statement that was made.

Queenie obviously has more brains and more taste that the both of you put together and by a large factor.

If I was going to involve myself in spurious, ingratiating, empty flattery I would make sure that the lady had a considerable asset base.

Look **** for brains,

Don't get cocky with me, your own grammar leaves a great deal to be desired, not just some of the time, all of the time!

Furthermore, I am not in the process of differentiating between either of these beautiful young ladies, so get that notion stuck up your fat idle bone lazy arse and **** it out in some far distant moor of which your county has plenty!

I take diffidence also when I see some swanky dripped up to the nines pissed up plonker like you initiating a class conscious superiority between contributors to this thread and coming out with comparisons when you haven't got the bloody right to.

This is a typical problem associated with twits who are taught by strange men wearing sack cloths, crucifixes and carrying a bible around all their lives, when their main interest is browning the tips of their fingers whilst making feeble attempts to teach the three R's.

You no doubt enjoy keeping those little secrets, in case their god strikes you dead!


You want a crack at someone, take a swipe at me, I can chew the like of you out before breakfast!

Stop trying to **** stir as well, you'll find both young ladies far too well educated to fall into that little trap!

My word, I know what to do now if the thread goes a little bit quiet for a while.

Mind you, I think I preferred it when it was quiet. Such language from these ruffians! It's enough to make one blush.

I know it's going to be entertaining when I see a Mathos post that starts with,

"Look, **** for brains..."

Well- I'm off to the pub where a wedding do is on shortly but in response to this-



That is a very similar remark to saying my posts are "dull". Both are bald, self reassuring, foundationless assertions and thus of an equal value. But one might say that "dull" is, at least, a more efficient method of saying nothing than a 25 word solecism. That can only be egotistical run-off.

You needed a full stop after "me" like this.

But I'm always willing to learn. I would consider it a favour if you could point out the faults in my grammar which should be easy for you if they sully my prose "all of the time". There are 4 sentences in the paragraph above.

I know they "leave a lot to be desired" from your point of view as they are not flattering you in a reciprocal arrangement with another flatterer, like they do at ladies' coffee mornings, but what exactly do they need to improve them grammatically.

Look Spendi Chucklebottom!

If I start on your grammar and spelling !!!

The pages of A2K would become totally jammed!

And as boring as your average posts -

Why don't you amuse us and tell us some stories about the men in the sack cloths?


PS I only do favours for women..

Well- I have now got back from the pub and I can assure all threaders that feudelism is alive and well. It has face-saving nomenclature but it's just the same.The bride wore white and the bridegroom had polished his shoes. And so they should. His tie caused some tittering but that's being a bit picky in my opinion. He'll never get it up tonight without a great deal of effort. He's twice round and she is more than that. And flat-chested.

Anyhow-- Mathos wrote



If you have a foot in both camps old boy your legs will gradually slide further apart which, as you might know if you have studied anatomy, will expose your scrotal sac to considerable ridicule and that isn't difficult even at the best of times.

DP did say my posts were "boring" and "rambling crap" and Queenie did say they were "interesting" and other complimentary things which I have forgotten due to my disposition to take compliments as some form of raiding of my wallet or, possibly, my innocence.

Trying to keep in with them both with some xanthonian, jellyfish squirming around on the spiked fence has that odour of desperation about it which I find so tasteless, and I know women find so wobbly-trembly. It can affect your vocal chords too.

You should be decisive. Take your chance. After all- Confucius- he say-"he who sits in middle of road is run over by traffic going in both directions". And you are a far-east fanatic.



And you are going to teach me grammar. Sheesh!

Anyway DP, one of the millions you admire so that they will admire you back, said she would write anyway she damned well wanted. Am I denied the same right? That's bloody naked fascism. I have as much right to my "comparisons" as anybody else has.

Have you got a thing about priests who fail to live up to the high standards of their calling. Let's face it, one among thousands and you're jumping all over him with a little too much enthusiasm as if phrases like "browning the tips of their fingers" really excites you and so much so that it distorts your perceptions of reality.



Get bloody started for phewk's sake. I can't wait. Don't keep saying you're going to get started. Get on with it. I can't see it "jamming" the pages of A2K even slightly never mind "totally" Methinks you have much too high opinion of yourself old chap.



Another assertion from one who knows nothing about the Goddess-cults which Christianity has worked so hard to eradicate and which are on the way back thanks to such distortions previously mentioned.

It's a feminist position. Have you not read Isis Unveiled? It's a two-volume mistresspiece by Madame Blavatsky and over a hundred years old. The dear lady would be whirling in her grave if she was told about Viagra.

The word masterpiece has an interesting history.

If I wanted to keep this going, I could write "Did you mean feudalism?"

:wink:

Interesting stuff though. I've never heard of Madame Blavatsky (nee Helena von Hahn, born in the house of her mother's parents in Ekaterinoslav (now Dnipropetrovsk), and can only speculate on what her views might have been had she known about the likelihood of Viagra.

She would probably think it "dull".

SPENDI CHUCKLEBOTTOM said:-

DP did say my posts were "boring" and "rambling crap" and Queenie did say they were "interesting" and other complimentary things which I have forgotten due to my disposition to take compliments as some form of raiding of my wallet or, possibly, my innocence.

Aren't you a lucky boy then Spendi, one young lady telling you the truth, like they do on the ID thread. Plus;- One young lady buttering you up
like an odd one or two do on the ID thread.

My, my, my, how I envy the popularity afforded to you!

You're an amusing little geriatric though, I'll give you that, sitting there in your piss soaked long johns, shouting up the support of a non existent deity and dreaming of days of yore with the men in sack cloths.

Once upon a time
When birds **** lime
And monkey's chewed tobaccer
Little Spendi run
Big finger up his bum
Didn't know,
What was the matter!


Now that has to be an improvement on drumming up your grammar and spelling errors!

Zimmerman would be proud of you lad.

Tell me Spendi, have you ever smoked opium?

Well, as spendy knows, women love flattery and I shall always stick up for him so long as he continues state that I am as clever as mathos and dorothy parker put together.
This doesn't mean that I didn't mean what I said about him being interesting though.

Please can we stop the grammar-bashing? If spendius's grammar is bad then mine is terrible.
DP hots up this thread. I like it.

My grammar is not bad.

It isn't up to the standard I would like it to be but factors outside my control are the cause of that. Women mainly.

What is so deplorable is that uneducated twits like Mathos think they are the final arbiters in such matters and thus, and it obviously follows from their own circular logic, that they have no need for any further study of the subject which then justifies them putting all their studiousness into themselves and inevitably coming to the obvious conclusion, which is so apparent in every move they make, that they are the creme de la creme and, if that silly old world could but just get its act together, ought to be given absolute power to determine all our destinies.

As if history doesn't prove what a load of shite that is.

Mornin everyone!

I've been away for the weekend - wasn't it hot?

Stayed in a hotel where there was a wedding service outside our room (in the courtyard) one of the songs played during the service was 'It Must Have Bee Love (but it's over now)'. Thought it was a very strange choice.

I've a Pitman's Elemenatary Typing certificate btw...

there's proud!

x

Hello, Smorgs. Say, would you be kind enough to tell me of Lord Ellpus' whereabouts and the general state of his mental and physical health?

I worry about that old boy and I haven't seen him around.

And, might I add, you are looking stellar this morning, smorgs. Top of the line.