THE BRITISH THREAD II

There are times when I feel like a fly paper, conditioned to attracting idiots.

Your about as comical as an outbreak of rabies in Battersea Dog's Home.

Nice compliment Farmer, thanks; an intelligent man from across the pond in our midst and he understands Spendi......

Ehhhh......

Is it safe to come out yet?

I was in the pub and came home with a murghi twister from the excellent Bangladeshi takeaway we're got to a row with my wife and now all you silly c***s have got another lot of silly nonsense going on the British Thread it's enough to make you puke.

Mathos wrote-



The integrity of a tale can be gleaned from the way it is told for anyone who can read past the third grade standard. And only those are the people I post for. That's the way of all writers if I may distinguish that distinguished body of men from those who pen long whinges about their emotional upsets involving characters much like themselves and those who created the upsets in situations much like those they have first hand experience of. Thrumming with repressed indignation.

I don't work for the Samaritans.

And do you really think I could not talk one of that lot into posing with me for a world-wide broadcast with my hands up her top. You don't know the modern young lady if you think I couldn't do that.

But I've never seen a newspaper in the pub. Will a giant TV displaying the news do?

Mathos wrote-



For once I agree with Mathos. It was a nice compliment. I had a "laughing bath" on the strength of it.

The fiddler- he now steps to the road...

WELL DONE MAC

I was in Glasgow earlier today, I decided to take a quick look at The Trossachs on the way home (hadn't been to that beautiful spot for years)
there were a few English and 'continental Europeans about, only an odd Jock or two. I queried this over lunch with a Jock bartender.

Och aye, they are all in England spewing up in your shop doorways, thank god.

It figures.


SPENDI

Yes the TV will do, I bet it will be like waiting for the second coming this.
The mind boggles, he actually believes his own fantasies.

I did say-



I didn't say tonight. She didn't show. There's loads of explanations for that.

But the pub was interesting just the same. At one point Vic said" My trouble is that I've too good a memory". He was flattering himself as usual.

II replied- "You remember Mummy's tits then? Or coming down the chute?

He agreed.

And then somedody knocked a pint over. And one of the bar staff came round with a red plasic bucket with a divided top so you can squeeze the mop out, a mop, of course, and a two foot high bright yellow sign like those outside newsagents with two legs only about 20 degrees apart bearing the legend CAUTION. CLEANING IN PROGRESS.

I asked the landlord why the sign didn't have a rotating orange warning light and some red and white plastic tape round the danger zone,and an emergency AMBULENCE parked in a nearby layby, with officials making sure none of us came to any harm, and he told me that the insurance policy hadn't got quite that daft yet.

It's good business for those who are on their way up the social scale manufacturing plastic extrusions with lettering patterns and safe buckets.

What I like about pubs is the unpredictability. The whole day is on a sort of narrow guage railway and 8 hours of that requires a rest.

We discussed Thomas de Quincey's attitude to destitute women in The Opium Eaters and decided that Social Security is part of a feminist plot to undermine our position.

There were three Venuses of Willendorf, two, Vic said three, Aphrodites emerging from the waves and a bunch of those Schopenhauer allowed his wit to play over.

So it wasn't so bad really.

What's the best way to deal with gobs of Olde English Marmalade/Peanut butter dropping into your keyboard?

penut butter kitkat chrucky is ice. you said penut/. i do to.

Yesterday night, my German team lost, then ManU looks a bit ...
But now Bolton seems to remember that they are situated in Greater Manchester :wink:

(Okay, more than 70 mins to go.)

I should have waited 4 minutes ...

Yes Walt-

It is usually best not to be too eager.

As a general principle I mean.

It causes price increases you see and everyone knows what to think about those.

Well, now all is going smoothly again ....

Besides in our Bundesliga.


(I think it's fascinating: for a price less than a ticket for one match I can watch live all 1st and 2nd German Bundesliga, most of Premier League, all European cup matches, plus a couple of Spanish, Italian and Austrian first and second division matches, sometimes this and that from other countries too.)

You'll end up brain dead Walt if you watch that lot.

Look at Andy Gray. He's brain dead goodstyle.

No panic, spendi, I wont do that. :wink:

sorry about last night's message.

There's a button to your right hand side, press it!


The nurse will come and sort it out for you now!.................

intriging...sent to everyone or just a special person? will have to scan backwards...

AND NOW CHELSEA 2 BOLTON 2 EVERTON 2 UTD 4.

Thanks Philip Neville.

Premiership goes to Old Trafford.

Did I see the pre-matches with the very same result a couple of hours ago? :wink: