THE BRITISH THREAD II

Also known as a Mondagreen.

Tenderhooks, which are made of either stainless steel, silver or gold depending on the market niche, are used in certain advanced sex games.

You lot are far too innocent for me to even attempt an exegesis of the procedures involved.

As far as I'm concerned, it's obvious that my hermeneutical skills are far less behind yours, let alone practice on aforementioned subject...

When Star Wars was all the rage, a small friend of my son thought their "light sabres" were called "life savers".

And

Jimi Hendrix in "Purple Haze"- "'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky" sounds more like "while I kiss this guy"

Or so they say.


Damn Roca, and damn all Spanish plumbing. I can't get the part I need to fix our loo, and I only broke it in the first place because it's STUPID.

Is that the one with the double button on the top of the cistern, McTag?
If it is, I'll bet it's either the siphon or a plastic washer that's gone kaput.

Bleach products cause them to disintegrate, apparently. I wonder what the Spanish use to clean their bogs?

Here's their UK website, if you haven't got it already. They may be able to help.

Screwfix don't sell Roca fittings, as far as I'm aware.

What arrangements are you making Mac for No Twos?

It serves you right for not Buying British when it comes to such a vital piece of equipment as a loo. The aptly named Shanks were well known for their excellence. By Appointment too I think.

I got the bit this afternoon, after trying four different places. Sorted.

Thing is, Roca have changed the pattern of their cistern valve recently, and of course none of the previous bits will fit. You have to buy the whole set, but the guy who sold me the new valve didn't tell me that. So late in the day, I've been hunting round for the dinky new double pushbotton thingy.

They're not designed to come apart, which I found out after using a wrench on the old one. They "click" into place, and once clicked it's well-nigh impossible to unclick them without a fair bit of destruction.

Anyway no worries Spendy, we are a two-loo family, sufferd no hardship, and one again can indulge in the luxury of choice.

Wm Shanks & Co of Barrhead. Barrhead of Shanks, Alex McLeish and yours truly.

[glows with pride :wink: ]

forget about an exegesis of the procedures involved...what ya get up to Spends?

Travelling round America one time, I went on the dry-docked Queen Mary at Long Beach, California.
And there, in the American "rest room" of that Clyde-built old vessel, there it was, in flowery blue script on the porcelain:

Wm Shanks & Co, Barrhead.

What a proud moment.

That name has been well irrigated on every continent on earth.

loos are. especially los espanol loos.

How do you pronounce Barrhead, McTag? It's not the same as bo'heed, is it? :wink:

Glad you got the bog sorted. They say their porcelain is tough enough to deal with the end product of even the spiciest fajita.

Do not confuse bawheed with Baurheed. Easily done.

Here's a thought, from the paper today:

Help me put Gordon in jail

If MPs pass ridiculous laws to limit our freedom, they should be forced to abide by them too

Mark Thomas
Thursday December 13, 2007
The Guardian

Rarely do first lines have the potential to cost thousands of pounds (outside of libel), and rarely do I get to write words quite like those that follow; so forgive me an over-dramatic opening sentence, but yesterday lawyers acting for me started an attempt to get Gordon Brown into the dock.
With lawyers and police working on the ongoing Donorgate inquiries, Downing Street can be quite crowded if you are trying to bring a legal action. Nonetheless, my lawyers delivered a letter to the director of public prosecutions yesterday afternoon calling for an urgent investigation into allegations that the prime minister broke the law by demonstrating unlawfully in Parliament Square last summer. If found guilty he could face 50 weeks in prison - though, after serving 10 years at No 11, he should do his bird with ease.
This is partly Mr Brown's own fault. It began when MPs rushed the Serious Organised Crime and Police Act 2005 through, forcing anyone wishing to demonstrate within an area around parliament to get police approval. This is the law that Maya Evans was arrested and convicted under, for reading out the names of the British and Iraqi war dead.
In the past 18 months I have legally demonstrated in every corner of the area this law covers, from Hungerford Bridge (demanding more trolls) to the Mall (demanding human rights in Saudi Arabia). The definition of what constitutes a protest is such that I had to apply for permission to wear a red nose in Parliament Square on Red Nose Day. Not to do so would have risked arrest. Last month I had to get police approval to hold a banner saying, "Support the Poppy Appeal".

If the wearing of a brightly coloured proboscis constitutes a protest, then the unveiling of Nelson Mandela's statue must do so too. After all, it celebrated the collapse of apartheid (a political cause), honoured a man who organised the armed struggle in South Africa (definitely political and quite possibly glorifying terrorism), and pledged to fight poverty. So, being civic-minded, I wrote to the police asking if I needed permission for a gathering at the statue. My event had speeches - in fact, they were extracts from the original speeches made on the day by Mr Brown and Mr Mandela. Yes, the police informed me, I did need permission to demonstrate - which I duly applied for and received. Unfortunately for the prime minister, it seems no one bothered to get police approval at the event he spoke at.

Mr Brown, however, is just the tip of the iceberg. One person can constitute a demonstration, but what exactly is a demonstration? In law, there is little to go by, but for various dictionary definitions, such as "an expression of opinion". It is my duty as a law-abiding citizen, therefore, to add to the legal letter served the names of MPs seen holding forth on political issues on College Green, urging the DPP to investigate them for breaking the law and demonstrating without permission. It does not matter that they are being interviewed for news programmes - the law allows no exceptions or exemptions. In fact, the news organisations could be guilty of organising unlawful demonstrations by asking MPs to speak, so I have reported them as well.

All of this may seem ridiculous, but, hey, they started it, and making a crap law does not exempt you from its provisions. So I am calling on all fair-minded citizens to report any MPs seen giving interviews on College Green or in Parliament Square. You can do so by photographing the offending MP and posting it to Shopanmp.com.

• Mark Thomas is a comedian and political activist; to support the action, you can buy an "I put Gordon Brown in the dock" badge for £2 at Markthomasinfo.com
• Any money not used in the legal challenge will be donated to Index on Censorship

A friend asks: If I buy a teddy bear for £10, name him Mohammed and advertise him on e-Bay for £30, will I make a prophet?

Watch out, McT!

You'll get yourself a festive fatwah...

x

Keep your eyes out for a blimp today, smorgy, there's a reward that could warm your cockles for christmas.


OK, an email jokey woke I've just received.

What's the difference between the England football team and Lewis Hamilton?

Lewis Hamilton woke up this morning, still working for McLaren.

That's how you spell it! I've been called it often enough, but have never seen it in writing.

Mak a kirk or a mill o' it.