THE BRITISH THREAD II

What?

I should apologise for Doowop and Spendy being sexist bastards?

I do not have that power of attorney.

smorgsie wrote-



Pray tell dear Madame what we might be required to do in order to escape from your disapproval in that regard.

I'm a willing learner.

You should apologise for the whole of your kind!

x

Oh, you just want me to talk dirty to ya, don't ya, spendataozoa?

If you don't know by now...

Besides, you can't train a man after a certain age, and what's the point? You're a celibrity.

x

And not just the Scottish ones!

x

smorgsie wrote-



"It ain't no use to sit and wonder why Babe
If you don't know by now
It ain't no use to sit and wonder why Babe
It don't matter anyhow
When the rooster crows
At the break of dawn
Look out your window
An' I'll be gone
You're the reason I'm a travellin' on
But don't think twice it's alright, Babe,
Don't think twice it's alright."

Celibacy isn't compromised by helping a lady rumple up the counterpane.
Or even two of them.

Who has two counterpanes on their bed?

Now that's just being nesh.

Or were you alluding to the old 'men love the idea of two laydees in a bed thing'?

I wouldn't share my man...

x

Have you seen the News about the latest diet study?

It just shows what bleedin' 'ippocrites these anti-smoking plonkers are. And food is tax free so they are not even making any contribution to the NHS when they are guzzling down their poison.

Bloody freeloaders.

And no matter what they do it is impossible to guzzle stylishly.

It amazes me that they don't put screens around restaurant tables. Possibly they have a tacit agreement not to watch each other.

Yep, no more bacon butties for me!

Here, you go, spends:

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=D9nI4oGy-4g

x

Ace. That's counterpane rumpling.

You're just an old Victorian smudgie.

http--www.virtualbartender.beer.com-VB...


See if you can get in this pub lads.

100% asexual. Rice Crispies.

I bet smollongie could pack a pub faster than those two twee teasers.

What the hells' a smudgie?

I've looked it up, and the only definition I can find is in The Urban Dictionary (I won't go into it - I'm a LAYDEE)

x

I see no-one was interested in my haggis or my mandolin quest.

I don't care.

Well I was where is it? Leicester 3 Chelsea 2 btw

**** 4 3

Looks like you are another old Victorian Steve banging on about 4 3s. You obviously only have a universal standard definition video format which is pretty naff really but very common so you're not alone.

See, Muckty...

You have to think with a rational mind - like a woman.

a. It was not a quest! You knew where to buy a Mandolin, so you went
and bought one.

b. It was serendipitous that you passed a shop selling your national
dish, so you bought 4 of them.

c. You did not describe the mandolin, the colour, price etc, so it's of little
interest to me, as a woman (w-o-m-a- n).

d. If your kilt would have blown up, whilst you were trudging up one
of the many hills of Stockport, thereby exposing you McNethers to
the indigenous people of the region...

Now THAT would have been worth putting digits on keyboard. As it happens, I was busy being outraged by the flippant sexism shown by you, and your ilk on this here British thread. That, and the fact that your post was at the bottom of the last page, and was completely missed by smorgs as she is 'empty-headed' - quoteing sussy.

Besides, we've got a map and directions of where you bought the said mandolin and haggis, posted by dear Walter, to look forward to later.

McNuff said?

Oh, and Good Morrow everyone.

I can't sleep. I've a lot on my mind. And if you were women, you would ask, what? But as you're all MCP's of the first water, I'll keep it to myself.

x

(Michael Winner voice) Calm down, dear. It's only the Brit thread!

I love your mock indignation, smorgs. Tell me, as you obviously think my comments regarding the ladies' football were only made because I was being chauvinistic. Do you ever watch it? Are you remotely interested in watching football of any kind, women's or proper? How many of your female friends and colleagues are remotely interested?
Now, given the choice between England ladies v. Deutsche frauleins playing in a football cup final on bbc1, and "Shop 'til you drop" (sort of Jeux sans frontiers, but with credit cards and handbags) showing on ITV, which would grab your attention?

I rest my case. Now, any chance of you rustling me up a bacon sandwich?