55
   

THE BRITISH THREAD II

 
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Wed 12 Sep, 2007 10:21 pm
smorgs wrote:
Mornin' and Goodnight again.

x

Now, THAT really was to early, smorgs! (Don't oversleep.)
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 12:42 am
Walter Hinteler wrote:
smorgs wrote:
Mornin' and Goodnight again.

x

Now, THAT really was to early, smorgs! (Don't oversleep.)



I did!

x
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 01:55 am
spendius wrote:

Has it anyting, as Smittie used to say, to do with liking an ice-cream on a hot day. Or a foaming pint. A long hot soak, a juicy steak with onions or a bacon and egg butty, a blow-job, getting into bed when it's minus five and the over and under bankets have been on "max" for two hours, a good shite, watching a horse you've backed win by half a length in a hard fought finish at 100 to 6, dozing off or walking into a pub which Renoir might have painted.


Poetry, Spendy, sheer poetry

Our pub was painted by L & P Decorators, est. 1999, ask for a quotation without obligation, no job too small.

Hey did anyone notice that Scotland won in Paris last night?

Very Happy
0 Replies
 
Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 02:40 am
McTag wrote:

Hey did anyone notice that Scotland won in Paris last night?

Very Happy
Notice? My radio is telling me every 10 minutes. And in Paris. Well they've done it now, Scotland must be odds on for European Champions 2008, with Scot Bet.
0 Replies
 
Francis
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 05:37 am
McTag wrote:
Hey did anyone notice that Scotland won in Paris last night? Very Happy


I did, McT, there were lots of drunk Scots everywhere!

Congratulations, btw (for the match, not for the drunk Scots!)
0 Replies
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 05:57 am
From ...

Le Parisien
http://i15.tinypic.com/5ywk2so.jpg


Le Figaro
http://i13.tinypic.com/6bj41uw.jpg

Libération
http://i5.tinypic.com/61xndi8.jpg
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 08:38 am
Mathos wrote-

Quote:
The lads will love it. I hope so anyhow, I'm pretty sure they are well blessed with the bottle to look after themselves in general and not be afraid of taking chances.


Sir Henry Rider Haggard, and they were real knights then, not any of this Sir Elton John, has a scene, in Alan Quatermain I think, where a father is watching his son taking some chances in circumstances which you are unlikely to meet with in the theme park. He expresses some fears for his son's safety and the lad tells him, looking up from the pit he's descending into that hasn't had the Park Ranger disinfect it since the last Evolution but three, that there's no need to bother because there's plenty more where he came from.

And Sir Henry was a few years up country when there were no mobile phones and the local lads couldn't have a jump until they had "dipped their spears in the blood of the enemy", and they didn't need a QC to get them off when Mr White man appeared in their midst.

That was no theme park.

I hope you are taking care to introduce these young lads to the writings of Sir Henry. Every young lad should read those. The feminists are doing their best to ban them of course. Sir Henry had a somewhat jaundiced view of the ladies. The love of his life had married another man whilst he was away bravely serving his country, and for position too, and he saw the other extreme in the bush probably after smoking some wild savannah ganga.

Imbuing a love of literature is a most important aspect of a young lad's development. It is difficult, if not impossible, to do that later in life. It's the love of literature that is the main thing. Swinburne said that Bowdler had done the world a big favour by cleaning up Shakespeare so it was fit for kids. Once the love of literature has been implanted it never goes. One can then always come back to literature when all else fails as is often the case. I hope the Harry Potter books have had the same effect on the kids despite my fearing that they might be a feminising influence. The problem with Harry Potter is that it's so fantastic it isn't being really believed. Assuming sane kids which I tend to do. There's a distance between the reader and this nutty stuff. The Bond movies are not much good for the same reason. Henry Fielding warned writers off doing it but it hasn't done. Kingsley Amis took notice though. With Sir Henry the reader is in the thick of it and there's nothing happens that is physically impossible. Even King Twala's wink as his head rolled past Quatermain was only one that he could have sworn he saw. He doesn't say his severed head actually winked. That scene has been cut out of some editions.

I always thought that Leo Vincey leaving college, bearing in mind the advantages he was blessed with which Sir Henry lays on him thick, to pursue the impossible dream in the Orient was impossible.

And here you are proving it is possible.
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 09:27 am
There are times Spendius, when you make an even bigger clown or also ran out of yourself than one could consider possible!

The lads will live their lives for experiences.

Reading is a factory pose for left wingers and more losers.

Zimmerman had a point!

I know your dissatisfied
With you're position and your place
Don't you understand
It ain't my problem.

Something like that from memory. There are other verses to go with it, but you will be aware of them.

Like I said, the lads will be able to take care of themselves!
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 09:46 am
Nobody can take care of themselves. That's an intellectually bankrupt idea. Fevered fantasy. Iconoclastic self delusion.
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 09:51 am
Thats your tongue in cheek response because you can't take care of yourself!

Trust me.

They will be fit to travel too!
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 10:54 am
smorgs: What kind of work are you looking for?

customer: I want to be a pilot.

smorgs: A pilot of what?

customer: A plane.

smorgs: Have you worked as an airline pilot before?

customer: no, but you could train me.

smorgs: Do you have any qualifications?

customer: No.

smorgs: Then you can't put it down as a job-goal!

customer: Well, it's on your list of jobs.

smorgs: So's brain surgeon.

customer: Well, put me down for that then.

smorgs: I can't, unless you have a realistic chance of getting a job as a brain surgeon, do you have any other job goals I can put you down for?

customer: Yes, layabout.

smorgs: You're already one of those, what else? And stop taking the piss!

customer: Labourer.

smorgs: Okay, now we're talking.

A day in the life...

x
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 01:56 pm
Smorgsie-

You should have asked him out to dinner. At least he isn't witless.

Mathos-

Nobody can take care of themselves. Our way of life is conditioned upon interdependence. And absolutely so. To encourage young lads to think otherwise is foolish. It is encouraging them to foster a fevered fantasy and an iconoclastic self delusion. It is a bad as thinking one is Napoleon.

Preventing that is what team games are for psychologically and is one of the principle functions of the educational system and particulary that of a Christian one. No man is an island.

That's why I'm like I am. I refuse to kid myself with a load of half-baked baloney hence I logically gravitate towards ease and comfort and assume that those who don't are either nuts or are trying to prove something to themselves which can't be proved if you define "taking care" as maximising survival chances. You seem to think that reducing survival chances is some great big display of machismo which proves you have never undergone military training as the single greatest aspect of such training is to maximise survival chances in dangerous circumstances.

You wouldn't be saying that the military are a bunch of nancies by any chance would you?

People would get put in prison for flying you over there in aeroplanes in the condition of some I have flown in.
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:06 pm
It's hard to get accepted for airline pilot jobs. My brother tried it.

I like the voice of the pilot in BA flights. Very posh, very competent, very confidence-making. I think they must go to pilot finishing school, they all sound the same. You would definitely buy insurance from these guys, if they were selling any instead of poxy duty-frees. They all sound like a mixture of Keith Floyd, David Attenborough and Tam Dalyell.
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:16 pm
Even harder when you're a labourer/layabout...

I'm a bit fed up tonight, don't want to go to work tomorrow, I'm covering a diary for someone who's off with 'palpatations' as well as my own, and they have just rejected the pay offer and Gordon's holding fast. He hates Civil Servants anyway.

Had to go in a big meeting in a stuffy room yesterday, spent the whole of it gazing out of the window wishing I was in Lyme Regis, even though I've never been there.

x
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:18 pm
Bet you a fiver we go on strike, it's heading towards a winter of discontent, don't you think?

x
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:22 pm
In Lyme Regis you can wear a long cloak and go and stand on the end of the harbour breakwater and let waves from a big storm wash over you.

Then you wish you were back in a cosy office in Didsbury.
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:24 pm
Hell I'm turning into Spendy. Shocked
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 03:26 pm
McTag wrote:
In Lyme Regis you can wear a long cloak and go and stand on the end of the harbour breakwater and let waves from a big storm wash over you.

Then you wish you were back in a cosy office in Didsbury.


Which would be okay with a dashing French lieutenant for company.
0 Replies
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 Sep, 2007 05:18 pm
Giving it the Stendhalian brand of foreplay.

You need to be quite well read to understand that attenuated level of cynical irony I'm afraid and it has nothing to do with me if anyone falls short of that ideal.

I don't lead a sheltered life. I deliberately expose myself to the blowtorch of advanced thinking. It makes going up the jungle in Burma look like throwing your rattle out of the playpen.
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Fri 14 Sep, 2007 12:02 am
Spendy you mention H Ryder Haggard with something akin to affection or admiration.

What about John Buchan, Salute to Adventurers?
What about the whole slew of British and other travel and adventure writing, non-fiction as well as fiction? Admirable, exciting, inspirational.

That did not come into being from people who were content to sit at home contemplating their navels. I admire Mathos' ambitious travels. He is one of Britain's hardy sons.
0 Replies
 
 

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