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im scared

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flakker
 
Reply Sun 12 Nov, 2006 10:50 pm
im scared the terrorists are gonna bomb my house
homosexuals are gonna spread aids
immigrants are gonna take my job
white kids are gonna badge my car
black kids are gonna steal my badged car
my girlfreinds gonna give me herpes
the asian drivers are gonna side swipe my car
the north koreans are gonna nuke my house
the iranians are gonna nuke my house after the north koreans do it
the praternity test is gonna come out positive
im gonna have to pay child support
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child
your kids are gonna egg my house
petrol prices are gonna send me broke
banana prices are gona send me broke
your wifes praternity leave is costing america productivity
your draining my tax dollars with your welfare
my unemployment is gonna dry up
the shrinking population is gonna send me out of retirement
the expanding population is gonna send me out of my acreage
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront Very Happy
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 1,530 • Replies: 25
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CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Nov, 2006 10:58 pm
im scared the terrorists are gonna bomb my house - start renting
homosexuals are gonna spread aids - practice abstinence
immigrants are gonna take my job - get a better education
white kids are gonna badge my car - ride the trolley
black kids are gonna steal my badged car - see above
my girlfreinds gonna give me herpes - don't get a girlfriend
the asian drivers are gonna side swipe my car - tststs lousy car again
the north koreans are gonna nuke my house - move
the iranians are gonna nuke my house after the north koreans do it - Didn't I tell you to move?
the praternity test is gonna come out positive - so?
im gonna have to pay child support - get over it
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child in your dreams
your kids are gonna egg my house = rightfully so
petrol prices are gonna send me broke - you're not alone
banana prices are gona send me broke - eat peaches
your wifes praternity leave is costing america productivity - maternity
your draining my tax dollars with your welfare - not me, buster!
my unemployment is gonna dry up - too bad
the shrinking population is gonna send me out of retirement - move to China
the expanding population is gonna send me out of my acreage -make up your mind now
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront - you're not THAT lucky
0 Replies
 
flakker
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Nov, 2006 11:14 pm
Quote:
white kids are gonna badge my car - ride the trolley


public transport?

id rather swim to work
0 Replies
 
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Nov, 2006 11:15 pm
On pavement? LOL
0 Replies
 
echi
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 12:34 am
your girlfriend owes me an apology
0 Replies
 
flakker
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 02:13 am
Quote:
your girlfriend owes me an apology


get to the back of the line and wait your turn
0 Replies
 
Chai
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 06:29 am
are you serious flakker?
0 Replies
 
material girl
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 06:44 am
Re: im scared
flakker wrote:
im scared the terrorists are gonna bomb my house -MAYBE BUT DOUBTFUL
homosexuals are gonna spread aids-HETROSEXUALS SPREAD AIDS
immigrants are gonna take my job-HANG ON TO IT WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT
white kids are gonna badge my car-GIVE THEM A SLAP
black kids are gonna steal my badged car-CLAIM THE INSURANCE
my girlfreinds gonna give me herpes-WHAT HAVE YOU GIVEN HER?
the asian drivers are gonna side swipe my car-INSURANCE
the north koreans are gonna nuke my house-!
the iranians are gonna nuke my house after the north koreans do it-!!
the praternity test is gonna come out positive-SHOULD HAVE PUT A RUBBER ON YOUR WINKIE
im gonna have to pay child support-YOUR OWN FAULT
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child-WHO BETTER TO GO TO!!!
your kids are gonna egg my house-ID SLAP THEM FIRST
petrol prices are gonna send me broke-SADLY TRUE
banana prices are gona send me broke-DONT BUY BANANAS
your wifes praternity leave is costing america productivity-BUT THE KID WILL EARN AMERICA MONEY
your draining my tax dollars with your welfare-i DONT CLAIM ANY
my unemployment is gonna dry up-DOESNT MAKE SENSE
the shrinking population is gonna send me out of retirement-YUOL GO MENTAL WITHOUT A JOB
the expanding population is gonna send me out of my acreage-BUY A TENT
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront Very Happy-IS THAT SO BAD
0 Replies
 
Bella Dea
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 08:02 am
I hope not flakkers not serious.

Because if so, I'd have to add to the list

I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.
0 Replies
 
echi
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 08:09 am
Bella Dea wrote:
I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.


Another classic.
0 Replies
 
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 08:16 am
I'm so worried about what's happening today,
In the Middle East, you know.
And I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval
System they've got at Heathrow.

I'm so worried about the fashoins today,
I don't think they're good for your feet.
And I'm so worried about the shows on TV
That sometimes they want to repeat.

I'm so worried about my hair falling out,
And the state of the world today.
And I'm so worried about being so full of doubt
About everything anyway.

I'm so worried about modern technology,
I'm so worried about all the things
That they dump in the sea.
I'm so worried about it, worried about it,
Worried, worried, worried.

I'm so worried about everything that can go wrong.
I'm so worried about whether people like this song.
I'm so worried about this very next verse,
It isn't the best that I've got.
And I'm so worried about whether I should go on
Or whether I shouldn't just stop.

(Pause)

I'm so worried about whether I ought to have stopped.
And I'm so worried because it's the sort of thing I ought to know.
And I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval
System they've got at Heathrow.

I'm so worried about whether I should have stopped then,
I'm so worried that I'm driving everyone round the bend.
And I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval
System they've got at Heathrow.
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 08:47 am
Re: im scared
flakker wrote:
homosexuals are gonna spread aids
my girlfreinds gonna give me herpes


Just use contraception.

flakker wrote:
im scared the terrorists are gonna bomb my house
the north koreans are gonna nuke my house
the iranians are gonna nuke my house after the north koreans do it


Why? Do you live in the White House?! Oh my god, you're George Bush, aren't you!

That explains the xenophobia...
0 Replies
 
flakker
 
  1  
Reply Mon 13 Nov, 2006 05:39 pm
bella dea:
Quote:
I hope not flakkers not serious.

Because if so, I'd have to add to the list

I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.


what chain of thought goes through your mind when you read this
Quote:
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront

obviously extremely implausible statement and conclude that the rest of the statement wasnt sarcasm?

what about this one:
Quote:
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child
do you believe that as well?
0 Replies
 
Bella Dea
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 08:05 am
flakker wrote:
bella dea:
Quote:
I hope not flakkers not serious.

Because if so, I'd have to add to the list

I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.


what chain of thought goes through your mind when you read this
Quote:
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront

obviously extremely implausible statement and conclude that the rest of the statement wasnt sarcasm?

what about this one:
Quote:
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child
do you believe that as well?


Perhaps you didn't catch the sarcasm and humor in my post either.
0 Replies
 
NickFun
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 09:09 am
I ain't scared.
0 Replies
 
echi
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 11:19 am
Bella Dea wrote:
flakker wrote:
bella dea:
Quote:
I hope not flakkers not serious.

Because if so, I'd have to add to the list

I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.


what chain of thought goes through your mind when you read this
Quote:
global warming is gonna make my house a waterfront

obviously extremely implausible statement and conclude that the rest of the statement wasnt sarcasm?

what about this one:
Quote:
madonna is gonna take my illegitimate love-child
do you believe that as well?


Perhaps you didn't catch the sarcasm and humor in my post either.


Bella Dea wrote:
I am scared flakkers stupidity and intolerance is polluting my environment.


Where is the sarcasm and humor, Bella Dea?
0 Replies
 
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 11:34 am
At my age, I can't afford to be scared or live in fear. I think Bush is responsible for much of the fear Americans have today; it's simply irrational.

I went to Israel for two weeks last month, even after friends and family members said "are you crazy!" I felt safer there than driving on the streets at home where accidents happen regularly on the expressway a block from our home. We were close to the borders of Lebanon, Syria, and Jordan. It was quiet on the eastern front.
0 Replies
 
Bella Dea
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 03:17 pm
When you take my post and cut it up, you lose the humor and the sarcasm.
0 Replies
 
echi
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 04:16 pm
Bella Dea wrote:
When you take my post and cut it up, you lose the humor and the sarcasm.


Okay. Well, maybe I just don't get it.

Was there any humor or sarcasm in your post to me?
0 Replies
 
Bella Dea
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 04:25 pm
Which one?
0 Replies
 
 

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