I have only a month to live, 27 days actually.

Maybe island feasts are not for me. It was a thought anyway.

My deepest condolences, Joe. I will mourn your passing.

They aren't cannibals, are they? You might get slowly roasted over an open spit, nicely basted in your own juices.

I'm wondering if Joe(onthespit)Nation returned to the scene of his crime, would anybody recognize him?

We're gonna miss you, Joe. But I want you to know that I, for one, think you are doing absolutely the right thing. And don't worry too much about the last meal. I'll bet those Mayans have already made plans about that. (BTW, that is strong stuff they smoke, isn't it? You're still on, huh?)

Joe
I just wrote a letter to President Bush asking him to intercede on your behalf by including you in his illegal immigration amnesty program. I'll let you know when he replies.

BBB

Re: Joe


Waiting-----waiting-----toe tapping-----waiting.

BBB

Icarus marking:

Since the natives have been so long in isolation, can't you sneeze on them or something? Also, not knowing their openess to logical debate, can't you tell them if there was only one bird left, they were pretty much SOL anyway?

Another thought, as a way to buy time, ask for something refrigerated.

Finally, as another option, perhaps you could go conquistador on their asses and wipe the whole bunch out.

Blaise, You have a good point, but it might have been possible to evolve into a new species by mating with something else! Joe(thebird)Nation. LOL

Only the gutless would choose this method.

The Xozyeoni-woohoo was only found on the one island, a large flightless bird which had one compelling aspect, it apparently could live for over three hundred years all the time sprouting huge feathers. The people, in their language "Zthatzne" meaning "Us", they have no other name for themselves, have incredibly long song-poems detailing the lives of individual Xozyeoni-woohoo, but the last recorded new birth was made in 1794 by one Christos de la Virve, a passing ship's doctor. This notation was later passed on to a young Charles Darwin, but he left the note in an overcoat which was later given to the Salvation Army.

I still think it is my duty to show up ready for whatever the fates provide.

I've made my plane reservations and have a hotel room with a view of the Gulf. If it is a clear day I may be able to see Isla Mujes shimmering in the distance.

Joe(I'll need to rent a rubber floaty)Nation

Joe, all I can say is the manner in which you're bearing this huge responsibility is both heartbreaking and admirable. Truly, there are others I wish would be so forthright in meeting their makers, post haste.

Given the time you've spent on the island, and the insights you've gained, it would be awful to lose this knowledge so, purely in the interests of science and sociology, are the women cute? I reckon the place should be pretty safe for the rest of us after you've bitten the one, or the big one has bitten you, so any tips on getting along with the natives would be most appreciated.

Cheers

Hey, Joe, not being one to tell you how to handle your business, but this pretty much seems like a one way trip you're embarking upon and I think you could get tagged with some pretty hefty late fees rental a floaty thingie: might be best to buy.

Right you are, B, that is why I'm putting everything on my American Express Card. It comes due on the fifth long after I'll will have become so much seagull bait.

It will be up to the lawyers and the estate planners to work out the bills.




There has been some obvious effects of inbreeding, but sometimes a nice jutting forehead can be considered attractive. I should mention that there are fourteen Zthatzne left, seven women, four children, two men and one individual of indeterminate sex. Of the seven woman, four are passed -way passed- childbearing age but the other three, ai choco-latte!!


They did a very beautiful "You are hereby condemned to death" dance for me the last night on the island. There was a lot of "You're going to miss this a lot when you are dead." images, mostly consisting of them grabbing ahold of their ankles and then jumping around to face away from me. Very revealing.

Joe(It makes me smile to think of it)Nation

I think for your last meal you should consider something quite adventurous. Have you tried octopus or squid in its ink? It looks horrible, black as night or death even, but it tastes delicious and the stains come out quite easily, not that you will be worried about that aspect.
Afterwards a really rich chocolate desert, death by chocolate for example.

I live in New York, you can get such fare at the local sushi place for lunch.

Calamari tastes like deep fried rubber bands, ah, but the Japanese know what to do.

Octopus is a thought. I always like eating something that is as smart as me.

Joe(and it will be something that will stick to my ribs)Nation

What surprises me most about Joe(livehighoffthehog)Nation is the idea of wasting his time on a2k whlie his life slips away...

I read that bit by Joe Nation and how the natives were so upset with him killing the last Xozyeoni-woohoo bird and how he was sentenced to death, and I looked up from my computer, through the open window, and my gaze fell upon my enormous flock of Xozyeoni-woohoo birds, which I had begun harvesting in the early thirties. The flock, as I mentioned, was now of prodigious size and I surmised that if I was to fly to this island and offer the natives several pairs of these birds they could resume their custom and perhaps Joe Nation's life would be spared.

I did a quick head-count of the birds. Approximately 345. Not enough. Maybe if I had 500 or so I could depart with a few.

But what about Joe?

Screw him. Let them kill the bastard.

What has he ever done for me?

Gus
Gus, what would you charge me for a pair of birds (male and female) to donate to the islanders so we could save Joe's life?

BBB

What part of my post did you not understand, BBB?

I thought I stated quite clearly that Joe's life is of little importance to me.

No birds will be headed in your direction any time soon.