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Tue 6 Jun, 2006 10:05 pm
We were sitting in the boat watching the water and casting and reeling and casting and reeling.
"Dad"
"Yeh"
"I wanna quit college before September. Now before you go ballistic I wanna give you some reasons"
I was really stunned . Do I go ballistic? I thought that, usually, right up until the point when I beat the living crap out of someone, Im the type section of calm and reasonableness. Hmmm, I may have to work harder on my coping skills, cause I love my son and dont ever wanna have something like him being afraid of me come between us.
AFRAID of ME? HAI my son is bigger than me and has been training in Martial Arts ever since he was in grade school. I always want to have him back me up if I say something stupid to one of my hillbilly neighbors.
"Yeh, I can easily take a year or two off, I already talked to my bio faculty and theyre accepting that Ive got an idea that I want to pursue"
My son has a dream, hes got an idea that he shared with me. Hes only 18 and he has a dream
(I coulda hugged him but ummm , you know, kinda Brokeback... and we were, after all in a boat. However I think I was never more proud of him than i was when he mADE that little speech about his ideas and hisdream)
"Does your mother know?"
Asking this is something that is in the male genetics I think. We go around dragging knuckles and grunting and scratching our asses. No matter what we do i the business world, we are just apes.
""OOOHHH OOOHHH< Im the vice president and chief operating officer OOOHHH OOOH AHHHH AHHHH"
So, no matter what the situation we always ask whether our wives are already informed of the turn of events (this is good) or whether they are not (this is not good because it means that the next steps that involve informing our mates will involve GREAT EFFORT)
"yeh mom knows"
"Whatd She say?"I feigned interest in a fish on but inwardly I was a hot mold of jiggling flan
"She said that wait till your father hears about how you want to quit after all that work and how nice they were to you at the school"
I recall that my son, MY S_O_N ,My little son who made calsium carbide at 10 has an idea to get involved in a project involving design of houses and speccing them for low cost construction.
I just stared at him and thought about that TV commercial" WHo are you and what have you done with my son?"
I have no problem that he will succeed. His grade point average was a strong 3.95 and only just because he dropped an honors project. Hes not really being challenged . HE know it and so do half his faculty.
"What can I say, I just want you to promise me that youll complete your degree and go on "
"yeh Ill definately do that , I know I need some letters behind me"
We continued fishing , and the thought that my brother in law gave to me when his son got accepted to Cal Tech came to mind
"With our kids , we can only give them roots and we can give them wings"
My son has strong roots and in the boat, on a hot day with the walleye biting, he showed me his wings.
oops , hes actually 19, he had a birthday in December . I guess I just wanna keep him young forever
come to the edge he said,
but we are afraid they said.
come, come to the edge he said
so they came to the edge
He pushed them
and they flew!
My husband and I have advanced degrees from excellent universities. Neither of us have made much money in our lives. My mother has a high school diploma and started selling real estate when she divorced my father. Today she is sitting on a very comfortable nest egg - that is when she is not traveling the world and having a blast with other elderly rich folk.
Your son knows he can beat the poop out you farmerman, he just doesn't want to lose your respect. I think you are lucky to have each other and even more lucky that you both know it. He can always go back to school, but he can never go back to being 19 again.
Hes a god kid and he got interested in a sort of modular construction technique that can be used for many sized buildings . Hes not even in architecture but took a materials strength course and got bit by the construction bug.
Fail or succeed , hes gonna be fine . I just hope he doesnt buy some damn POS motorcycle.
Farmerman--
Yeats said what I mean:
Look up in the sun's eye and give
What the exultant heart calls good
That some new day may breed the best
Because you gave, not what they would
But the right twigs for an eagle's nest!
Congratulations.
yeh, I guess youre right there Noddy. Ive been busy feeling sorry, when I should be celebrating his independence .
Farmerman--
My 43 year old son is still ambling towards a BA. He's also saving humanity through computers, paid to advise foreign graduate students (foreign computer geeks are bigger geeks than native born computer geeks), working for VISTA and running his own business.
Some kids not only hear different drummers, they are marching to lutes, bagpipes and tubas that the rest of us don't have in our limited orchestras..
Celebrate your son's glory and independence and then when he's momentarily out of sight, beat your breast and tear your hair and bang your head against a piece of conventional construction.
Children!
Well that's a nice story Farmerman, and it reflects well on all of you.
I am sure your son, with your support, will achieve all his goals, in whatever order he chooses to tackle them. I think it's great that he can think- and act- outside the box, outside the tramlines of convention, and is eager to follow his instinct and desire.
Hes got so many interests that my name for him is "butterfly in a shityard".
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