GI Joe Before the Disastrous Film Rewrite

Cobra, is a campus intel team (they pick Destro, the confidential informants, DARPA employees), the campus professors (Iron Grenadiers, the hired Pentagon advisors), the American police (they pick a Cobra trooper), the American military officers (they pick a named figure, in Cobra), or the corrections officers (they pick a hero figure, but realistic, an actual military function).

Oktober Guard, is a retired soldier (a Dreadnok) returning to service.

Iron Grenadiers, are all Mossad (the named figures among the Iron Grenadiers, the philosophers, the munitions men and women) or a VFW sponsor (the troopers in the Iron Grenadiers, the fantasy of a novelist).

Chuckles, for example, is an insurance agent, he teaches insurance derivatives to soldiers, to bankrupt them, so they can't gamble with a reliable strategy, and have children in poverty (criminals, for the Cobra troopers to clean up). It's vile, to be called Chuckles, the worst insult to a GI Joe comics fan.