WARNING: LONG STORY, I'M NOT AN ENGLISH.
Me and him, let's call him T.
I was his classmate in elementary school. At the beginning of 3rd grade, I have been started liking him. Maybe he was the most handsome kid in my class
(Some people will say why I'm so young that I already had a crush? I don't know too)
Things started off pretty well, I kept giving T snacks, and he started thinking I was crazy, so he noticed me. I was moved to sit next to him, and I often borrowed a pen. I found T often smiles at me, so I was hoping he liked me a little. But me and T kept trying to act like we really hate each other, fighting all the time and the whole class thought we couldn't sit close to each other. I remember when we were rehearsing for the play, we had a fight (it was painful). I don't know why we were like that, but of course after that I still took T's stuff as a joke and still liked T
4th grade, then 5th grade... 5th grade was when we finished elementary school. I try to play with all the other kids because the school year is coming to an end, so I teased T less (still teased). I took T's (kinda rude) things but he just ran over and was quite calm. I remember the (almost) last day of grade 5, my class had a power outage. At that time, the whole class ran out into the hallway because it was too hot, and I was still in class and drawing. T was too. At that time I turned to look at the clock and noticed that T was looking at me. *his first time like this*. I was quite shy (first time), and went back to draw again
But after a while when I turned around, he was still looking at me (30 mins). He put his chin on his hand and looked sad
There was a lot of things happened that I can't write it all here, so I think he liked me, at least a little bit.
Me and T were pretty good at school, so we decided to go to a middle school for the gifted. Neither of us knew that the other wanted to go to the same school as ourselves. And the good news, we failed. So we applied to another public school, which didn't require a grading test and was based on elementary school performance.
Hahahaha? That school is far from our elementary school so no old friends of us will study there. And sadly I went to the same school as him. *half sad half happy*. Coincidentally, we both often go home by bus, and take the same bus route
His class and mine also often study together. All in all, I still haven't separated from him completely. There's only one problem: We don't talk to each other. We haven't said a word, literally. There's no reason. Maybe it's because I was to shy, so he didn't either? Sometimes we went to the same club or talk to our friends, but it's all indirect talk, or insinuation.
Then there were some misunderstandings so I thought he had a girlfriend. I uncrushed T.
2 months later, another person named H, likes me and pursues me. This boy is very gay, and mean
He confessed and I refused. I've been a bad temper kid, but he talked sweetly to me (childlike, not 18+), so I feel cool, and I liked H a little bit.
And we can be considered as a couple, in 7th grade. But I really hate his personality, boasting and treating his friends badly. His friend said he liked someone else, and yes, he dumped me (fine)
After that, I thought I would stop dating and focus on my studies. And also because I don't really understand what LIKE or LOVE is. I didn't want to waste my time doing useless things and was determined not to like anyone.
And sheesh, *one night I dreamed something* and the next morning *talked to my friend* for a while. And I thought, I suddenly thought of T even though we didn't see each other during the lockdown.
And sheesh 2, my friend *gave me some tests*, within 3 weeks I thought a lot and maybe I liked T again, really liked him, different from when I liked H or when at elementary school.
It's been 7 months since then. The 8th grade year will begin in a little over a week. I really don't know how to start a conversation. Saying hello is weird, because we haven't talked for 2 years even though we meet a lot. And it will be funny because we used to pretend hating each other. What does a boy who are good at math, English, badminton, basketball like?
When I was dating H, he showed off his whole bunch and probably everyone knew, including T. Will he hate me too? I've missed 3 years to say I like T, now it's 2 years of 6th and 7th grade.
WHAT SHOULD I DO?
I plan to say I like him.
I think I will date when I'm 18.