Are we using people when we're trying to impress them?

I don't see any way you could be using someone when you are trying to impress someone. My definition of using someone is setting up a fake personality or persona in order to get what the individual wants. Trying to impress someone may be attempt to later use someone but just the simple impressing is not. I may make up a marvelous story something that is totally fictious to impress someone because i want them to be my friend. Ahh ok i just changed my opinion i guess in some cases trying to impress someone is using someone. But i think in relationships someone is always using someone else. The only time you as the individual may not be using someone is when you sacrifice your life or work to say helping the needy. But that would make them use you. Using someone is not a bad thing. Its the same motto as kill or be killed in a sense. Use someone or be used

Re: Are we using people when we're trying to impress them?


Friends are people who agree to be used, because they use you too. You both lean on eachother and in the end you both come off better. Maybe I'm just a cynic but that's how I see friendship.

I would give my right arm for my best friend and I know he'd do the same for me. We're both better off that way.

A secure person does not need to impress others. He is not concerned about impressing. He simply is himself. When someone attempts to impress others, he is using the other person to (falsely) inflate his own ego.

Good answers.

I don't see it as using someone because the person is not in any way taken advantage of, meaning that the person is not merely treated as a means. I don't think many people would deny that they have been in a position where they feel like they need to impress someone so that they could like you. Now, I think that usually when you are trying to impress someone, you appreciate the being of the other person. If you are merely trying to impress someone so as to use them (meaning of use is to not form a form of mutual relationship with them) then I don't think it is right. It is preferable I think, when being nice, to be nice because it is right. Yeah, well there's my opinion.



Phoenix, I kinda agree with what you said, even though our ethical philosophy might not be the same. However, I think that even the most secure person has felt like he or she needs to impress someone; maybe I'm mistaken here, maybe it's just a flaw of mine I need to fix.

Phoenix what aboiut in the case of a job interview where you are much more guarenteed the job if you impress the person interviewing you