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Sat 9 Apr, 2005 10:17 am
I always thought you had to perform miracles to become a saint. However, I've noticed in the last few decades the Catholic Church has been bending the rules to allow a lot more people into that holy club. It seems almost anyone can become a member nowadays...
If I was canonized I think I would like to be Saint Green Witch, Patron Saint of Good Eating. My symbol would be a knife, fork and spoon. People would pray to me before trying out a new restaurant or before they sat down to Aunt Ethel's famous pot roast. I would protect people from food poisoning and dirty diners. People would leave offerings of truffles and really good olive oil at the feet of my statue. On my saint's day people would give gifts of Le Creuset cookware and Kitchen Aid Mixers. All my shrines would have an Aga stove that never goes out.
What saint would you like to be?
I'd be that saint too. Can there be two of them?
I'd be Saint uh- What's-'is-name, the patron saint of uh- you know- uh- things you can't remember.
Quote:All my shrines would have an Aga stove that never goes out.
Nice touch. I think the collection baskets are going to have to work overtime for that one.
I would be Saint Souse the patron saint of beer.
My shrine would consist of fountains powered by kegs with neverending beer flowing from them. At my feet would be great bowls of pretzels and peanuts and in my hand an upraised pint.
I wanna be just like Santa Cruz, the patron saint of low riders . . .
I'd be Saint Banga.
The Saint of banging mad chicks.
Saint Swivelbottom. That'd be me. Yeah.
ossobuco wrote:I'd be that saint too. Can there be two of them?
Sure Ossobuco, we can take turns doing the Sou Chef work.
Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:I'd be Saint Banga.
The Saint of banging mad chicks.
I was going to suggest the faithful wear little gold condems around their necks, but I seem to recall the Church does not approve of safe sex. That could lead to a lot of little Slappy's running around.
We DEFINITELY don't want that.
I would be Ste. Boomerang, the patron saint of foster kids. My shrine would be a super cool tree fort and kids would leave me devotions of crayolas and small toys and where they would repeat the "I want to stay with you" rosary so that I would intercede to find them a happy home.
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