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"Pan, Pan! I ain't got Naan!" (Lisa's lament)

 
 
jjorge
 
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 04:15 am
O, woe, this accursed no-bread diet!...
to all who may hear me, Don't ever try it!
Sourdough, Rye, and sweet Anadama,
I crave you so badly, I'm starting to stammer,
and I might sell my soul for datenut or banana,

A Boule, a Baguette, a Biscuit a Bagel!
O, Pain de mie, why can't I finagle,
one phony Panera (unboiled) bagel?

O, Brioche, O. Flatbread, O, Challah, Chiabatta,
they think I've gone crazy, but you’re what's the matter!
No bread, no bread, NO BREAD! that's all!
Not even a Matzo (rolled in a ball)!

Pan Dulce, Panqueques, Pandesal,
I'd kill for each one of you --I lust for you all!
(Lisa says, sobbing) "It's been an ordeal.
My cravings torment me at every meal!"

Envoi:
So that is her story, 'no-bread' makes her crazed,
(better than ill-bred, the wise-aleck says)
and the whole melodrama has lasted
THREE DAYS!
-jjorge
 
jjorge
 
  1  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 04:17 am
@jjorge,
I wrote this for fun a while back to kid my friend Lisa.
farmerman
 
  3  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 05:14 am
@jjorge,
its great, I love when you assemble all the bread stuffs that are off her diet an then we find out she hasn't even got a week in it.

Do you have any of your work published?

Ever think of doing a poem about the many types of folks we are here on A2K?
jjorge
 
  2  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 06:34 am
@farmerman,
Thanks for the kind words, Farmerman. It is a true little story and I had fun writing it. ...and my friend, who is a great person, smiled!
I've written about 170 poems and shared them on the web etc. ,but have not published any in the usual way. I DID submit two individual poems for publication to journals. Neither one was accepted.
.
Then, a couple of years ago, an acquaintance of mine, who has a small, successful book publishing business, and likes my poems, offered to publish a chapbook for me. Needless to say, I felt 'validated', but, as I looked over the poems, I thought that I needed to 'polish them up' first. The truth is, once I felt 'Validated', I lost my impetus to publish, and just let it pass.
.
Finally, after reflecting on my mortality this Spring ( I'll be 76 next month) I decided that my grandchildren might like something to remember me by.
So, on my own, I put together chapbook of some thirty-nine poems with the help of FEDEX. I called the chapbook 'Moose Stew' after a tiny poem I wrote on that topic, and it has a cute color picture on the front of a nervous-looking moose who may have heard someone say, 'Moose Stew.'
I made about 25 copies and gifted them to my grandkids and a handful of friends who seemed pleased to get them.
.
Truth be told, I had FUN putting 'Moose Stew' together, and I'm planning on doing at least two more similar chapbooks, tentatively named: 'Moose Two' and 'Moose Do Too!'. The former being similar to the first, and the latter pulling together some of my 'R' rated poems.
edgarblythe
 
  2  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 08:00 am
I've been a fan of your work all along. Good to know it will in some form be preserved.
farmerman
 
  2  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 08:00 am
@jjorge,
I sent a friend up in N Maine a clip of your "moose Stew" as a reminder that moose should be fed what moose like to eat. (They have a lot of moose and mooslings up
jjorge
 
  1  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 08:02 am
@edgarblythe,
Thanks, Edgar, your opinion means a lot to me.
0 Replies
 
jjorge
 
  3  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 08:19 am
@farmerman,
Here's 'The rest of the story' on 'Moose Stew'...

I have a very nice niece, who lives in a rural area of New Brunswick, Canada.
Once, during an internet conversation, two years ago, she said that she was going to enjoy ‘Moose Stew’ later that day.

While it may be logical that those large northern critters would be a food source for someone, I had never heard of moose stew and had never considered the idea of eating moose. Like many people, I hold illogical views about which animals are okay to eat (cows, sheep, pigs, chickens, turkeys) and which are too cute or loveable to devour ( cats, dogs, horses, guinea pigs, hamsters). I actually take it a step further and refuse to eat ‘bambi’ (venison).
Anyway, I pondered briefly, then mentally placed moose in the latter (inedible) category.

Meanwhile, in the back of my mind, I was saying to myself that I’d ‘dislike moose stew,’ and, as I contemplated who else would feel the same way, I thought: ‘Moose too.’
Well, all this rattled around in my brain for a little while -ie. ‘Moose stew’ “Moose too” and eventually “Moose do.” (notice that all three sound nearly identical!). Finally, all my mulling and ruminating culminated in the little poem of that name.
BTW, only a couple of weeks after I wrote it, I was substitute teaching in an elementary school hereabouts. As I walked down the first grade corridor that day, I was admiring the kids drawings hung displayed on the wall. In front of one particular classroom there was --a whole row of moose drawings! One in particular had a moose whose eyes looked frightened. Anyway, I took a picture of that one with my iPhone and that is what I used two years later --ie. Feb 2018-- as the cover of my chapbook. Meanwhile I have been trying through the school to locate the kid who drew it so as to get his and his parents blessing for my having used it.
0 Replies
 
jjorge
 
  1  
Reply Sat 14 Apr, 2018 08:41 am
@farmerman,
"..Ever think of doing a poem about the many types of folks we are here on A2K? ..."

Hmm... interesting idea.
0 Replies
 
 

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