My psychological theory on desire

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Long post. Please be open-minded, and tell me what you think if you can.
Thanks.

Often, strong desire is a delusion of need. When one associates a strong "high" (I would have used pleasure but I don't want it to be confused with the Epicurean notion of the word pleasure) feeling, because of dopamines, with something, whether it be by accident, etc, the person would feel as if they "need" the feeling. However, before they felt the feeling they were perfectly well/happy and even calmer. The desire makes the illusion that we 'need' the feeling (like we can't live without it), but we actually don't.

The tricky part is that usually people are usually stuck with regenerating the feeling over and over again and thus are often enveloped in the illusion. If a person felt this feeling for something not appropriate, society, including the person, has a problem. Now, a person who is thinking of the feeling again and again will associate it with the something that was associated with it earlier. In this case, the person will falsely look at the feeling and the something as one. Thus, because of the illusion desire makes, and the false rationalization, the person feels "stuck." The person now has a responsibility to deal with his problem.

If the person recognizes the problem and accepts that he or she needs to fix the problem, then it is possible to handle the problem. However, if the person has no recognition of it from the start, it gets complicated and probably need chemical or psychiatric help.
I propose that the solution to the problem,is to simply stop thinking that the feeling is a "need". In other words, do not let the feeling be the guide. It is, I think, crucial to stop wanting the feeling and to stop thinking about it altogether.

Well that's what I got for now.

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I don't know exactly what you mean by "this feeling" that is mistaken with need. What if what we call mental illness is just a healty reaction to a fu***d up society.

What if this illution you're talking about is the need for a fast car? Many people desire that so much that they get physical reactions whenever they see the car of their dreams. I am getting at the basic "need" for consumption we're tangled in as a society. Our basic needs are quite real, but even those are greatly inflated. I need food, but I don't need a kitchen that can cook for fifty men.

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If the person recognizes the problem and accepts that he or she needs to fix the problem, then it is possible to handle the problem. However, if the person has no recognition of it from the start, it gets complicated and probably need chemical or psychiatric help.

Most people are unaware of their problems. That's why they have them.

I don't think the solution is to stop listening to your heart, if that's what you mean. Listen to your feelings, but do not let your feelings listen to you. Don't tell yourself what to feel.

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Interesting, Ray. Just heard something on the news tonight about this very topics.

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Desire is usually the product of external propaganda, be it commercial, political, or cultural, leading one to adopt a need for the target in question.

This occurs because the subject of the desire is emotionally swayed by whatever arguements are used to support this visceral 'need' for something; and is unwilling, or unable to logically think through this new 'addiction' in order to disarm it.

The most important thing for one to do in life, is to thoroughly assess your actual priorities, on a frequent basis, and with utter candor!

[what REALLY matters to you?]

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Thanks Letty.
BTW, what was the news about?

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Most people are unaware of their problems. That's why they have them.

Yes, but some are aware of them. The problem is, people sometimes try to rationalize their feelings.

I know my so called solution is perhaps too presumptious, but I do believe that the first step in solving a problem is to believe that it can be solved.

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I don't think the solution is to stop listening to your heart, if that's what you mean. Listen to your feelings, but do not let your feelings listen to you. Don't tell yourself what to feel.

I blatantly disagree. Think about it, what would the world be like if everyone does what they feel like doing. It's very well for a person whose feelings are appropriate, but for those who are having problems, "listen to your heart" is a harmful argument.

Person A feels angry towards person B. A feels like beating B up, should he? Or should he realize that his feelings are unreasonable? I believe the latter.

When I was typing my theory out, I was in particular thinking of sexual addiction. I know this problem includes a subtle physiological aspect, but it is also psychological, that's why cognitive therapy is part of the treatment for it. If they were to do as they feel, they would be harming themselves more by engaging in more and more sexual activities.

Let me give you an example: They had an experiment with rats where they electrically stimulate a part of the rat's brain that gives a "high" feeling. They found that the rat would keep pressing the button that stimulates this electrical impulse even when they are already exhausted.

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Desire is usually the product of external propaganda, be it commercial, political, or cultural, leading one to adopt a need for the target in question.

This occurs because the subject of the desire is emotionally swayed by whatever arguements are used to support this visceral 'need' for something; and is unwilling, or unable to logically think through this new 'addiction' in order to disarm it.

You're right BoGoWo, people tend to rationalize their feelings rather than logically think through it.

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The most important thing for one to do in life, is to thoroughly assess your actual priorities, on a frequent basis, and with utter candor!

[what REALLY matters to you?]

Priorities are important. It's not just what really matters to 'you', because 'you' can be interpreted in many ways; I think it is also what is "right".

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Well, Ray. What I heard was on the TV news from my local station in Orlando, but this item underscores it:

Looking for a Libido Lift?
The Facts About Aphrodisiacs
by Tamar Nordenberg
The moon is nothing
But a circumambulating aphrodisiac
Divinely subsidized to provoke the world
Into a rising birth-rate
--from A Sleep of Prisoners by Christopher Fry

In the pursuit of sexual success and fertility, the moon, and everything under it, has been touted as an aphrodisiac by some person or culture. Love potion peddlers stop at nothing to sell their sexual wares. "I'll make you the same promise that my wife made to me," says Theodore Maximillian in the provocative brochure for his "Maxim" product. "I'm going to cure your impotence immediately!" Maxim "acts as a potent aphrodisiac," according to the advertisement.

An aphrodisiac is a food, drink, drug, scent, or device that, promoters claim, can arouse or increase sexual desire, or libido. A broader definition includes products that improve sexual performance. Named after Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of sexual love and beauty, the list of supposed sexual stimulants includes anchovies and adrenaline, licorice and lard, scallops and Spanish fly, and hundreds of other items.

According to the Food and Drug Administration, the reputed sexual effects of so-called aphrodisiacs are based in folklore, not fact. In 1989, the agency declared that there is no scientific proof that any over-the-counter aphrodisiacs work to treat sexual dysfunction.

When I think of the animals that have been slaughtered because they are reputed to have powers of libido enhancements, I feel rather ill.

Robert Frost explains the "desire" factor rather well also.

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That's just sad Letty. This society is too sex-oriented.

I'm gonna have to look up on that Robert Frost poem, or is it the Fire and Ice one? That one's good.

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Yes, Ray. It's the Fire and Ice one. <smile> and yes, Frost, (in spite of his sir name) did have a handle on a lot of things. Interesting background, as well. Read "Love and a Question" sometimes.

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The human mind is suggestible and can be easily preyed upon by callous businessmen.

It's sad, but you can (to a certain extent) resist many of the desires pushed onto you.

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I have some problems with your arguement. You basically say:

We can convince ourselves that we need things that don't really need, ergo, we ought to never believe that we really need anything.

I can't just will myself to not need food because I desire it.

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We can convince ourselves that we need things that don't really need, ergo, we ought to never believe that we really need anything.

That wasn't what I was saying. What I was saying was that sometimes desire makes us think we need something when we don't actually need it, and thus we must be careful in not getting "sucked in" by this false association.

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I can't just will myself to not need food because I desire it.

Food is a need and I don't argue that. However, when you want to eat something even when you don't need it to sustain a healthy balanced well-being, the desire makes us think we need the food when we actually don't.

I ate a chocolate, it tasted good, after some time, I want to eat it again, and at that time it felt as if I could not go on without it, and that is the basis of all desires, to make you preoccupied with the thought of the thing so as to make you "feel" as if you need it. However, if I remind myself that I don't need it and not think about it, I can stop this desire that is if I truly believe that I will not think about it. It's kinda weird but I'm saying that the first step to solve this type of problem is to fully believe you can stop thinking about the desire and your will will decide what the outcome will be. Thus if I was telling myself I couldn't possibly not think about the chocolate, I'm boxing in myself.

You probably disagree but it's a debate forum, and any criticism would help me improve upon the theory. Very Happy

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My psychological theory on desire

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