Halloween Rant

Last year I had 25 kids. This year, close to 100. I ran out of candy and ended up robbing my change container and gave away quarters, then dimes. The kids loved it!

Most of the kids knocked. Only three kids yelled out "Happy Halloween."

My favorite time of the year.

Now Christmas? That's when I'd like to put red ropes around my porch.

To each their own.
I live in a mobile home, and there is an affluent neighborhood next to mine. The kids all go there. In twenty years I could count our trick or treaters on one or two hands. Tonight it is raining heavily. So, none should be out at all. I would treat them if they came.

Well, you could have a custom-made sign at the end of your driveway that says: NO TRESPASSING. TRICK OR TREATERS WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULLEST EXTENT OF IRANIAN LAW!

Or, you could have a tape recorder behind the door to your porch entryway with the sound of a growling, snarling dog on tape; one that sounds like the meanest son of a bitch in forty counties. Rig it up to a motion sensor. No one in their right mind will risk opening the door. You will surely be on everyone's list of where not to go on Halloween.

Unfortunately, that probably only makes your house look "scarier", like you're testing their nerve.

I know...you can't win!

Oh Christ. If they are climbing through, under and over ropes, you think there're going to read a sign?

The scary dog recording would just attract them

On Halloween, it's a perfect opportunity for ne'er do wells to intersperse themselves with the innocent kiddies. I'm not opening my door to complete strangers, either with or without a child. If Wally knew I did that, he'd be spitting mad (at me).

My immediate neighbors who have kids know I don't participate, they would be the only people I care about.

For the last 2 years in a row, at 1 am, someone knocked on the door. You know that was someone who had ill intent. However, he figures people are so afraid to not appear "nice" one of them might be foolish enough to open their door. Then let the fun and games begin.

Before Wally left, I mentioned that 1 am knocker. He said he would make sure I knew where the gun was before I left. I'm not helpless, I just am not into stangers, children or not, having access to my home because it's some giveaway day.

I have new neighbors across the street, who built a really expensive house. At first they had their gate open, and I saw 2 kids go up, with their parents waiting on the street. When I looked again, they had the gate closed, and had put a table in front of it with a bowl of candy.

I know my next door neighbor, Bill, doesn't give out treats either.

The parents around here must have a group text thing going on. Within one minute, the street went from empty to full of kids, then the herd moved on en masse.

Frankly, I think kids should just have halloween parties.
When I was a kid, no one would have been caught dead having your parents escort you from house to house. We trick or treated in packs. That time is over though, and I question the safety of the whole out dated custom.

Heh. These are the same people who won't let their kids walk 2 blocks to school, or let them ride a bike in the street, but they will send them right up to a complete strangers door and let them me given something of the strangers choosing.

If parents are so worried about the children nowadays that they won't let them go out on their own, shouldn't I be worried about God knows who knocking on my door?

Oh yeah, I forgot. It's all about the children and protecting them, and to hell with everyone else.

I frankly couldn't care less what the kids would love.

The thought of having to pretend amazment at children I don't know or care about, who are wearing random costumes I'm supposed to comment on so I don't get the stink eye from their over protective helicopter parents makes me want to barf.

Or, it was someone who had been attacked by a pack of kids and had crawled to your door looking for help. And when you ignored them, that pack of kids finally caught up with them and dragged them off to some backlot for a good old fashioned mauling.

Good point! Then maybe a barbwire fence . . . or no, an electric fence. Or better yet, an electric barbwire fence.

I'm joking, of course.

Oh no, I like that last suggestion.

But now if I hear on the news next year that some kids were electrocuted when they got hung up on some electric barbwire on Halloween night, I'm going to feel somewhat responsible.

Gonna snitch?

Oh yeah, Glennn will spill his guts.

No! I said I'd feel responsible, and even then, only somewhat responsible. But I wouldn't rat out a home-forum poster . . . because chai would probably show them my posts and then claim to be impressionable.

Not had any since my youngest left primary school. It's very small scale over here, kids tend to knock on their classmate's houses and a few neighbours they know but that's about it.

It's just a run up to the main event on Sunday which has always been my favourite day of the year.

Penny for the old guy . . . do they even still use pennies in old Angleland? Here in Canadia, they retired the penny.

Yes we do, although they're not the same as the old ones but still pretty redundant.

In circulation.


Old pre decimal penny, (240 to the pound.)

I'm surprised they even come by - usually the kids are smart enough to know who the grumpy old folks are and don't bother as it is a waste of time when there are some many other homes that give out the good stuff.

I also remember myself as a kid not bothering with homes without the lights on figuring that is another few minutes I waste trying to get candy there and no one is home when I can use that time to get more candy. With the limited time I have to trick or treat - it is all about strategy to get the most loot possible in as a short amount of time you have.

Anyway for next year - I would guess that many of the adults (maybe not all) do not see your tape (depending on how far from the side walk your front door is) and since you don't have your lights on - they might not see it and thus warn the young kids. Young kids, on the other hand, are capable on only focusing on this one goal - to ring your bell and get candy so they don't understand that the tape is supposed to stop them. Kids are so busy and wrapped up in their kid lives that they don't realize adults may have a different agenda - just the way kids think.

I suggest next year - you put up a sign (I know someone else suggested it) but I think the direct approach is best in this situation. Put the sign up where adults will be sure to see it - on the sidewalk next to the walkway to your door and/or driveway. Maybe even with it so there is a light that shows the sign. Make it clear you are not giving out candy, but without being rude or trying to be funny. Something along the lines - like "No Halloween Candy due to sickness - Please do not Disturb."- I suggest putting something on like sickness or elderly as you would draw sympathy and less likely result in someone egging your house thinking you are just mean grumpy cheap people. The sickness line will more likely keep people away than any threats as they are more likely concerned they might catch something.

Sounds like you set up the perfect haunted house for kids to go to.

It's a big thing around here. Lots of don't enter! signs. That's a guarantee on our block that there will be excellent treats.

yup

perfect haunted house set-up

you couldn't be more Halloweenie if you'd made a project of it



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go wild, go out for dinner next Halloween, go to a bookstore or library

if you hate it, get out of its way

Just be glad you do not live in Salem, MA. I don't but know people who do - just imagine a month of every crazy dressing up partying and so forth in your neighborhood. Even those that like Halloween get sick of it living there.