A thread dedicated to the art of stalking

I genuinley and honestly have had a stalker since 1986!!!!! It's a long story and I won't bore you with it. He's never been threatening to me, and given his circumstances I've always felt sorry for him. Up to me moving house, he sent me birthday, valentines and xmas cards (I met him at college) every year. Sometimes, he would just come (on the bus)and sit on the wall outside my house for hours......he became 'one of the family'. I was living on my own then so had no 'man' to get affronted or 'sort him out'. It never occured to me to contact the police.....what would I say? "a man sends me cards and sometimes sits outside my house". Besides stalking wasn't much known or talked about. It was the days before the worship of celebrity really took hold, so you never really heard of stalking.

The only time it got difficult (after I'd moved house and hadn't seen him for two years) was when I was working for Jobseeker's Allowance (unemployment) and was posted to a different office.........he came in to 'sign on'! He just stood and stared at me (I wasn't dealing with him) he signed and left. I had a terrible night, phoned my boss who is my friend as well and told her all about it. In telling her I realised that now he knows where I worked I had to do something about it!

Next day he came in as soon as we openned.....and stood and stared! I whispered to my friend that it was him........"he's very ugly" she said. I said "stalkers don't come in handsome, otherwise they'd be called your boyfriend"!

Needless to say security removed him, and I was allocated a different office.

Sorry to ramble on about it.....but I've never really talked about it in the past.......I'm almost embarrassed by it! Now don't get me wrong, I'm not bad looking, but I'm nothing 'special' so why me?

What I want to know is: How do they chose you? I am sooo not concious of giving any signals in the original meeting or since, apart from being friendly and polite to him at college - I was aware he was not the 'fitty inny' type and so made an extra 'effort' with him, but certainly nothing that could be construed as a come on.

The above is an edited version......but it's all true!

The line between respecting a persons boundaries and being a stalker is not fine, or blurred, for people who respect others wishes that is.

I didn't mean to come off as harsh, but can't you see the damage a stalker can do to a person just from the posts on this thread?

Yes I can and I would venture that men have a hard time understanding the fear of a stalker as is apparent by these posts.
Sarah....absolutely bone chilling.

I agree with the bone chilling Panzade. I've had guys come to my job to see me when I was bartending, but I never actually had anyone stalk me. I've been in an abusive relationship but never stalked. I can only imagine how unsettling that must be, knowing that someone is watching you. Man or woman, I thinks it would be just as creepy.
I've been flashed by a few pervs who stopped their cars and asked me for the time and I've heard all the whistling and comments while I was jogging and that was bad enough. I just can't imagine the fear of being stalked. I truly feel for you guys.

Yes, I understand, and some of these anecdotes are pretty creepy. I'm not trying to make light of anyone's personal experience with stalking, I'm just used to goofing around on Slappy's threads.

So when you see the Kool-Aid guy avatar, it is not a stalker posting, just an ironic (insert epithet) trying to have fun.

Oops!

I know what you meant Garg and I'm not dissing you. Sometimes Slappy's silly threads open up some serious cans.

Just re-read my post......it looks really bad, like anybody else would have done something earlier......but really, it went on for so long I just got used to it. I suppose I feared being 'mocked' for actually having one (stalker)! As I've said, you just don't expect your 'ordinary' person to have one, and one so enduring. I was deeply embarrassed by the whole thing (still am). I don't live in fear of him by any means, and there's whole weeks when he doesn't enter my thoughts, but he never really 'goes away' and probably never will. I did pass him in my car a few months ago, he didn't see me, but I was tempted for a split second to drive slowly beside him to 'torment' him........sounds awful doesn't it? I wouldn't have though.

Anyway, now I have Mr S...(ex-boxer, but sensitive and kind)...and he would "beat 10 cans of **** out of him" if he ever came near me again!

Sorry to go on, but it's been very cathartic!

We noticed

Am I going on too much now?

Not at all Sarah. You just spill it all out girl ;-)

You stalkin' a me?

That was meant to be read in a 'Bobby' kinda way!

Just an attempt at humour on a thoughtful night!

No, it feels good not to have to carry this stuff around in one's head dosen't it?
Some people have no idea what it's like.

You're on to me. I figured since I've never been stalked, I might as well do the stalking

-wishes montana would stalk him-

On my way Seed. I need practice anyway ;-)

Would you like some flashing with that or just strait stalking?

asking a man if he would like flashing... my word... of course i could do with a side of flashing... (be for warned there might be some flashing in return though)

Oh great! I need the experience. Thanks for your help Seed :-D

Speaking of being Flashed....

The experience I encountered wasn't of a stalking nature. But sure SKEERED the hell out of me. It was basically being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Strip Joint......sitting outside waiting for a friend to come out. (We were looking for a women that had abandoned her child) Man walks down street. He's holding onto...umm, well.....
You can tell he's up to something. He gets even with my car and the next thing I know, I have a window full of....Umm.....I didn't say a word. I just reached up and clicked the lock button and turned my head.

I think the words that come out of my mouth about that time were...OMG!! I was in shock by his actions. It was still quite light outside....and people driving up and down the road. IT sure gave me something to talk about when I got home. But of course, why I was sitting outside a Strip Joint was hard enough to explain.

Ewwwww!!!!!!!!!