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Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."

Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."

Rodney Dangerfield


"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."

Lynn Lavner


"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."

Camille Paglia



"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are unimportant."

George Burns


"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship."

Sharon Stone



"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."

Tiger Woods



"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."

Jack Nicholson


" Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."

Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a sense of humor)



"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."

Robin Williams



"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

Billy Crystal


"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."

Robert De Niro


"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"

Dustin Hoffman


"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. J ust show me somebody naked'."

Jerry Seinfeld


"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."

Robin Williams


" It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom."

Joan Rivers


" Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy."

Steve Martin


" You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for in later life."

Elmo Phillips


" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."

Oscar Wilde


" It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."

George Burns

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What a magnificent song, bobsmythawk. This perfectly sums up what real and true love ultimately strives to be.

Gunsmoke' Actor Dennis Weaver Dies

By BOB THOMAS, Associated Press Writer
LOS ANGELES -
Dennis Weaver, the slow-witted deputy Chester Goode in the TV classic western "Gunsmoke" and the New Mexico deputy solving New York crime in "McCloud," has died. The actor was 81.

Weaver died of complications from cancer Friday at his home in Ridgway, in southwestern Colorado, his publicist Julian Myers said.

Weaver was a struggling actor in Hollywood in 1955, earning $60 a week delivering flowers when he was offered $300 a week for a role in a new CBS television series, "Gunsmoke." By the end of his nine years with "Gunsmoke," he was earning $9,000 a week.

When Weaver first auditioned for the series, he found the character of Chester "inane." He wrote in his 2001 autobiography, "All the World's a Stage," that he said to himself: "With all my Actors Studio training, I'll correct this character by using my own experiences and drawing from myself."

The result was a well-rounded character that appealed to audiences, especially with his drawling, "Mis-ter Dil-lon."

At the end of seven hit seasons, Weaver sought other horizons. He announced his departure, but the failures of pilots for his own series caused him to return to "Gunsmoke" on a limited basis for two more years. The role brought him an Emmy in the 1958-59 season.

In 1966, Weaver starred with a 600-pound black bear in "Gentle Ben," about a family that adopts a bear as a pet. The series was well-received, but after two seasons, CBS decided it needed more adult entertainment and cancelled it.

Next came the character Sam McCloud, which Weaver called "the most satisfying role of my career."

The "McCloud" series, 1970-1977, juxtaposed a no-nonsense lawman from Taos, N.M., onto the crime-ridden streets of New York City. His wild-west tactics, such as riding his horse through Manhattan traffic, drove local policemen crazy, but he always solved the case.

He appeared in several movies, including "Touch of Evil," "Ten Wanted Men," "Gentle Giant," "Seven Angry Men," "Dragnet," "Way ... Way Out" and "The Bridges at Toko-Ri."

Weaver also was an activist for protecting the environment and combating world hunger.

He served as president of Love Is Feeding Everyone (LIFE), which fed 150,000 needy people a week in Los Angeles County. He founded the Institute of Ecolonomics, which sought solutions to economic and environmental problems. He spoke at the
United Nations and Congress, as well as to college students and school children about fighting pollution and starvation.

"Earthship" was the most visible of Weaver's crusades. He and his wife Gerry built a solar-powered Colorado home out of recycled tires and cans. The thick walls helped keep the inside temperature even year around.

"When the garbage man comes," Jay Leno once quipped, "how does he know where the garbage begins and the house ends?"

Weaver responded: "If we get into the mindset of saving rather than wasting and utilizing other materials, we can save the Earth."

The tall, slender actor came by his Midwestern twang naturally. He was born June 4, 1924, in Joplin, Mo., where he excelled in high school drama and athletics. After Navy service in World War II, he enrolled at the University of Oklahoma and qualified for the Olympic decathlon.

He studied at the Actors Studio in New York and appeared in "A Streetcar Named Desire" opposite
Shelley Winters and toured in "Come Back, Little Sheba" with Shirley Booth.

Universal Studio signed Weaver to a contract in 1952 but found little work for him. He freelanced in features and television until he landed "Gunsmoke."

Weaver appeared in dozens of TV movies, the most notable being the 1971 "Duel." It was a bravura performance for both fledgling director
Steven Spielberg and Weaver, who played a driver menaced by a large truck that followed him down a mountain road. The film was released in theaters in 1983, after Spielberg had become director of huge moneymakers.

Weaver's other TV series include "Kentucky Jones," "Emerald Point N.A.S.," "Stone" and "Buck James." From 1973 to 1975, he served as president of the
Screen Actors Guild.

Weaver is survived by his wife; sons Rick, Robby and Rusty; and three grandchildren.

Hi PoetSeductress:

I sing karaoke. Of all the places I've sung I've only found one place that has that song as a choice. I'll sing it tonight. The instrumental intro sets the song up as out of the ordinary. The dj who hosts the karaoke is the only person I've heard sing it live other than myself. I almost feel guilty choosing it as that means he won't sing it. As you say, a wonderful song.

Bob

HI Letty, Im having a pity party day. Sorta feeling over worked and under appreciated. So here it is:


Words and music by bob seger

It seems like yesterday
But it was long ago
Janey was lovely, she was the queen of my nights
There in the darkness with the radio playlng low
And the secrets that we shared
The mountains that we moved
Caught like a wildfire out of control
Till there was nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove

And I remember what she said to me
How she swore that it never would end
I remember how she held me oh so tight
Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then

Against the wind
We were runnin' against the wind
We were young and strong, we were runnin'
Against the wind

And the years rolled slowly past
And I found myself alone
Surrounded bv strangers I thought were my friends
I found myself further and further from my home
And I guess I lost my way
There were oh so many roads
I was living to run and running to live
Never worried about paying or even how much I owed
Moving eight miles a minute for months at a time
Breaking all of the rules that would bend
I began to find myself searchin'
Searching for shelter again and again
Against the wind
A little something against the wind
I found myself seeking shelter against the wind

Well those drifters days are past me now
I've got so much more to think about
Deadlines and commitments
What to leave in, what to leave out

Against the wind
I'm still runnin' against the wind
Well I'm older now and still
Against the wind

Bob Seger, an incredible artist, says something about popular music when Bob consistently lost out to Bruce Springsteen.
"wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then"

<smile> A pity party? Love that, shari. Let's throw this one in, listeners, for our shari's party.

Sooner or later you going to be comin' around,
I'll betcha,
I'll betcha if I let ya you'll baby me.

You're gonna knock on my door,
You did it before.
Matter of factly I don't know exactly when.

But sooner or later you're gonna be comin around,
And want my lovin' again.

Well, that song just popped into my head and I have no idea if I got it right nor who did it.

I like that song Letty!!

Thanks, shari. Wish I could find the complete song. This ain't my day, I guess.

I just noticed that our cowboy through in a little line of wisdom from Bob Seger. I agree, dys. <smile>

The lights are on but who is home ?????????????


Artist: Queen Lyrics
Song: I'm Going Slightly Mad Lyrics


When the outside temperature rises
And the meaning is oh so clear
One thousand and one yellow daffodils
Begin to dance in front of you - oh dear
Are they trying to tell you something?
You're missing that one final screw
You're simply not in the pink my dear
To be honest you haven't got a clue
I'm going slightly mad
I'm going slightly mad
It finally happened - happened
It finally happened - ooh oh
It finally happened - I'm slightly mad
Oh dear!
I'm one card short of a full deck
I'm not quite the shilling
One wave short of a shipwreck
I'm not at my usual top billing
I'm coming down with a fever
I'm really out to sea
This kettle is boiling over
I think I'm a banana tree
Oh dear, I'm going slightly mad
I'm going slightly mad
It finally happened, happened
It finally happened uh huh
It finally happened I'm slightly mad - oh dear!
I'm knitting with only one needle
Unravelling fast its true
I'm driving only three wheels these days
But my dear how about you?
I'm going slightly mad
I'm going slightly mad
It finally happened
It finally happened oh yes
It finally happened
I'm slightly mad!
Just very slightly mad!
And there you have it!

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sentiments spéciaux...

MANDOLINS IN THE MOONLIGHT
(George Weiss / Aaron Schroeder) (1958)

Perry Como


Mandolins in the moonlight, beautiful music of love!

We're not in Venice in a gondola beneath skies of blue,
And yet it seems we're there, signorina, when I'm close to you.
'Cause I hear mandolins in the moonlight,
Mandolins in the moonlight,
See what magic you start.
A song of Italy sings in perfect tune with the strings of my heart.

We won't be tossing coins in the fountain down in Rome tonight,
And yet my dreams come true, signorina, when you hold me tight.
'Cause I hear mandolins in the moonlight,
Mandolins in the moonlight,
See what magic you start.
A song of Italy sings in perfect tune with the strings of my heart.

(Instrumental Break)

Now here's the way they whisper, "I love you", down in Napoli,
Ti voglio bene, mia signorina, and that goes for me.
'Cause I hear mandolins in the moonlight,
Mandolins in the moonlight,
See what magic you start.
A song of Italy sings in perfect tune with the strings of my heart.

Mandolins in the moonlight, beautiful music of love.

Hey there, London. Well, buddy, you and queen can join shari's and my mad hatter's tea party. <smile>

well here is another fruit cake



I TALK TO THE TREES
Paint Your Wagon : The Musical
(Lerner & Loewe)
Tony Bavaar


I talk to the trees
But they don't listen to me
I talk to the stars
But they never hear me
The breeze hasn't time
To stop and hear what I say
I talk to them all in vain

Refrain;
But suddenly my words
Reach someone else's ears
Touch someone else's heartstrings, too
I tell you my dreams
And while you're listening to me
I suddenly see them come true

I can see us on an April night
Sipping brandy underneath the stars
Reading poems in the candlelight
To the strumming of guitars

I will tell you all the books I've read
And the way I met the King of France
Then I'll send the servants off to bed
And I'll ask you for a dance

Refrain;
But suddenly my words
Reach someone else's ears
Touch someone else's heartstrings, too
I tell you my dreams
And while you're listening to me
I suddenly see them come true

PS ---- you say tea. I hope you mean real tea. not a cup of warm water, over which you casually wave a limp teabag.
GROWN UP PROPER DEEP BROWN TEA PLEASE

Sure, John. whatever you say.

I still have a box of green tea here, but people have told me that it is awful, so I'll just stick with coffee.

Seems that some folks, listeners, talk to trees and cars, etc. but never get answers. Pity that.

I was going to watch TV tonight.
But I'm too tired.
Had a nice cup of tea, now I'm going to bed early.
Don't worry, it'll take more than caffeine to keep me awake tonight.
Goodnight all.

Goodnight, taggers. Sleep well, Brit.

McT ---- he will ascend the apples & pears, lay his uncle ned on the weeping willow & have a good nights bo peep.

Cheer up you guys!

Who knows what tomorrow brings.
In a world, few hearts survive.
All I know is the way I feel.
When it's real, I keep it alive.
The road is long, there are mountains in your way.
But we climb a step every day.
Love lift us up where we belong, where the eagles cry.
On a mountain high.
Love lift us up where we belong, far from the world.
We know, up where the clear wind blow.
Some hang on to used to be.
Live their lives, looking behind.
All we have is here and now.
All our life, out there to find.
The road is long, there are mountains in our way,
But we climb them a step every day.
Love lift us up where we belong, where the eagles cry.
On a mountain high.
Love lift us up where we belong, far from the world.
We know, up where the clear winds blow.
Time goes by, no time to cry, life's you and I.
A live today.
Love lift us up where we belong, where the eagles cry.
On a mountain high.
Love lift us up where we belong, far from the world.
We know, where the clear winds blow.

Well, try, as one thing leads to another, how about this poem:

THE EAGLE
By Alfred, Lord Tennyson

He clasps the crag with crooked hands;
Close to the sun in lonely lands,
Ringed with the azure world, he stands.


The wrinkled sea beneath him crawls;
He watches from his mountain walls,
And like a thunderbolt he falls.

That poem says more in six lines that many do in an epic.