WA2K Radio is now on the air

From roosters to sheep, edgar? My Gawd, I think I remember that parody. UhOh!

Mary had a little lamb,
She fed him castor oil,
And every time he jumped the fence
He fertilized the soil.

My word, folks, we thought that was sooooo bad when we were kids.

A wag as a noun is a humorist and as a verb is an action of wagging. Did I make that perfectly clear? (RMN)

That's the one, edgar. I just printed out your page and fumbled around on my studio piano attempting to play the melody line only. ( one sharp, you know. ) I think that puts it in the key of G major, but not certain. I have gotten really rusty about key signatures.

I now recall that yitwail said that Carlos Jobim was influenced by DeBussy, and did a search on The Cuckoo by Louis Claude Daquin. That was such fun to play on the piano.

And now that you have the tune, here are the words to sing to it.

Stranger on the Shore

Here I stand, watching the tide go out
So all alone and blue
Just dreaming dreams of you

I watched your ship as it sailed out to sea
Taking all my dreams
And taking all of me

The sighing of the waves
The wailing of the wind
The tears in my eyes burn
Pleading, "My love, return"

Why, oh, why must I go on like this?
Shall I just be a lonely stranger on the shore?


The sighing of the waves
The wailing of the wind
The tears in my eyes burn
Pleading, "My love, return"

Why, oh, why must I go on like this?
Shall I just be a lonely stranger on the shore?

Raggedy, fantastic. All this time, folks, I thought it was an instrumental. Thanks so much, PA.

Well, since we are talking ship to shore how about this one:

Artist: Looking Glass Lyrics
Song: Brandy (You're a Fine Girl) Lyrics
(dooda-dit-dooda), (dit-dooda-dit-dooda)

There's a port on a western bay
And it serves a hundred ships a day
Lonely sailors pass the time away
And talk about their homes

And there's a girl in this harbor town
And she works layin' whiskey down
They say "Brandy, fetch another round"
She serves them whiskey and wine

The sailors say "Brandy, you're a fine girl" (you're a fine girl)
"What a good wife you would be" (such a fine girl)
"Yeah your eyes could steal a sailor from the sea"
(dooda-dit-dooda), (dit-dooda-dit-dooda-dit)

Brandy wears a braided chain
Made of finest silver from the North of Spain
A locket that bears the name
Of the man that Brandy loves

He came on a summer's day
Bringin' gifts from far away
But he made it clear he couldn't stay
No harbor was his home

The sailor said " Brandy, you're a fine girl" (you're a fine girl)
"What a good wife you would be" (such a fine girl)
"But my life, my lover, my lady is the sea"
(dooda-dit-dooda), (dit-dooda-dit-dooda-dit)

Yeah, Brandy used to watch his eyes
When he told his sailor stories
She could feel the ocean foam rise
She saw its ragin' glory
But he had always told the truth, lord, he was an honest man
And Brandy does her best to understand
(dooda-dit-dooda), (dit-dooda-dit-dooda-dit)

At night when the bars close down
Brandy walks through a silent town
And loves a man who's not around
She still can hear him say

She hears him say " Brandy, you're a fine girl" (you're a fine girl)
"What a good wife you would be" (such a fine girl)
"But my life, my lover, my lady is the sea"
(dooda-dit-dooda), (dit-dooda-dit-dooda-dit)

"Brandy, you're a fine girl" (you're a fine girl)
[FADE]

"What a good wife you would be" (such a fine girl)
"But my life, my lover, my lady is the sea"

Dedication time, folks. This is for Walter and Dutchy.

"Corcovado"
(Antonio Carlos Jobim)
Quiet nights of quiet stars
Quiet chords from my guitar
Floating on the silence that surrounds us
Quiet thoughts and quiet dreams
Quiet walks by quiet streams
And the window that looks out on Corcovado
Oh, how lovely.

This is where I want to be
Here with you so close to me
Until the final flicker of life's ember
I who was lost and lonely
Believing life was only
A bitter tragic joke
I found with you,
the meaning of existence oh my love.

And for our dj.

The Twa Corbies

As I was walking all alane,
I heard twa corbies makin a mane;
The tane unto the ither say,
"Whar sall we gang and dine the-day?"

"In ahint yon auld fail dyke,
I wot there lies a new slain knight;
And nane do ken that he lies there,
But his hawk, his hound an his lady fair."

"His hound is tae the huntin gane,
His hawk tae fetch the wild-fowl hame,
His lady's tain anither mate,
So we may mak oor dinner swate."

"Ye'll sit on his white hause-bane,
And I'll pike oot his bonny blue een;
Wi ae lock o his gowden hair
We'll theek oor nest whan it grows bare."

"Mony a one for him makes mane,
But nane sall ken whar he is gane;
Oer his white banes, whan they are bare,
The wind sall blaw for evermair."

I'm Not In Love
10cc

[Music and Lyrics by Graham Gouldman and Eric Stewart]

I'm not in love, so don't forget it
It's just a silly phase I'm going through
And just because I call you up
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
I'm not in love, no-no
(It's because)

I like to see you, but then again
That doesn't mean, you mean, that much to me
So if I call you, don't make a fuss
Don't tell your friends about the two of us
I'm not in love, no-no
(It's because)

(Be quiet, big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)
(Big boys don't cry)

I keep your picture upon the wall
It hides a nasty stain that's lyin' there
So don't you ask me to give it back
I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me
I'm not in love, no-no
(It's because)

Ooh, you'll wait a long time for me
Ooh, you'll wait a long time

Ooh, you'll wait a long time for me
Ooh, you'll wait a long time

I'm not in love, so don't forget it
It's just a silly phase I'm going through
And just because I call you up
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made, ooh

I'm not in love, I'm not in love...

Victor Mature
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia



Born 29 January 1913
Louisville, Kentucky, USA
Died 4 August 1999
Rancho Santa Fe, California, USA

Victor Mature (29 January 1913 - 4 August 1999), an American film actor, was born in Louisville, Kentucky to a Tyrolean father, Marcellus George Mature, a cutler, and a Swiss-American mother, Clara Mature. He is often described as an early examplar of the term "beefcake" due to his muscular physique and stolid onscreen manner. But unlike any of his contemporaries and his many successors, Mature always brought a sense of fragility, doubt and uncertainty to his characters. His Samson in Samson and Delilah is no doubt his best known role; not because of the beefcake, but for the pathos he brings to the blinded hero.

Discovered while on stage at the Pasadena Community Playhouse, his first leading role was as a fur-clad caveman in One Million B.C. (1940), after which he joined 20th Century Fox to star opposite actresses such as Betty Grable and Rita Hayworth. However, with the US entry into World War II, Mature entered military service. Rejected by the Navy for color blindness, he enlisted in the Coast Guard, reaching the rank of chief boatswain mate by the war's end.

After the war, Mature was cast by John Ford in My Darling Clementine, playing Doc Holliday opposite Henry Fonda's Wyatt Earp. For the next decade, Mature settled into playing hard-boiled characters in a range of genres such as westerns and Biblical films, such as The Robe (with Richard Burton and Jean Simmons) and its popular sequel, Demetrius and the Gladiators (with Susan Hayward). Both films deal with the fate of the robe worn by Jesus before the crucifixion. Victor also starred with Hedy Lamarr in Cecil B. DeMille's Bible epic, Samson and Delilah (1949) and as Horemheb in The Egyptian (1954).

Mature was under no illusions as to his acting prowess. Once, after being rejected for membership in a country club because he was an actor, he cracked, "I'm not an actor - and I've got 67 films to prove it!"

Victor Mature died of leukemia at his Rancho Santa Fe, California, home in 1999, at the age of 86. After his death, his body was brought back to his hometown of Louisville and was buried in his family's burial plot at St. Michael's Cemetery, 1300 Ellison Avenue.

Katharine Ross
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Katharine Juliet Ross (born January 29, 1940 in Los Angeles, California) is an Academy Award-nominated American movie and stage actress. Her prominent film roles include:

Shenandoah, as James Stewart's daughter-in-law.
The Graduate, as Elaine Robinson, a college student who discovers that her mother and boyfriend have had an affair
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, as rural schoolteacher Etta Place in the 1890s involved with the eponymous outlaws
They Only Kill Their Masters (1972) as a murder suspect
The Stepford Wives
The Legacy (film) (1978)
The Final Countdown, as the secretary to a U.S. Senator in the 1940s
Donnie Darko, as a psychiatrist treating the title character, a teen with disturbing visions
She also starred in the 1980s television series The Colbys playing opposite Charlton Heston as Francesca Colby.

She has been married to actor Sam Elliott since 1984.

Claudine Longet
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia





Background information

Born January 29, 1942
Origin Paris, France
Genre(s) Pop music
Years active 1960s - 1970s
Label(s) Barnaby, A&M

Claudine Georgette Longet (born January 29, 1942 in Paris), was a popular singer and recording artist in the 1960s and 1970s. She was best known as the ex-wife of singer Andy Williams and later for being convicted for killing skiing star Spider Sabich.

She met Williams while he pulled over to aid her on a Las Vegas road. She was a dancer at the time at the Folies Bergere. They married on Christmas Day 1961 and had three children, Noëlle, Christian and Robert. In 1968, she appeared in The Party with Peter Sellers and sang "Nothing to Lose" by Henry Mancini. Longet recorded a series of five albums for A&M Records between 1966 and 1970 and two albums for Williams's Barnaby label in 1971 and 1972. She also made frequent acting appearances in television series and appeared from time to time on Williams' variety series and specials. Williams called Longet a beautiful, sleek brunette with large doe eyes, "my favorite French singer". She and Williams separated in 1969 but did not divorce until 6 years later.

One song, "Wanderlove" (music and lyrics by Mason Williams), went to #7 on the charts in Singapore and still occasionally gets airplay on Asian radio.

Longet was arrested and charged with the March 21, 1976 shooting death of her lover, Olympic skier Vladimir "Spider" Sabich at his Aspen, Colorado home after he had showered and was preparing to dress. Sabich was a very handsome athlete with no lack of female companionship when he met Longet. As their relationship progressed, Longet and her three children moved in with Sabich, radically altering his bachelor life. There were widespread rumors of discord between the couple before the shooting. Spider had told friends he wanted Claudine out of his house but had taken no real action to evict her because he adored her children. At the sensational trial, Longet claimed the gun discharged accidentally as Sabich was showing her how it worked. Despite the fact that the autopsy found that Sabich was bent over with his back turned to her and Claudine was no closer than 6 feet from him, she stuck to her story that it was a tragic accident. Williams very publicly supported Claudine throughout the trial, even escorting her to and from the courthouse.

The Aspen police made two enormous blunders which turned the tide for Longet. They took a blood sample from her and confiscated her diary without warrants. Longet's blood contained cocaine and her diary showed that her relationship with Sabich had turned bitter. Since the evidence was not obtained legally the prosecution couldn't use it. The gun was also mishandled by non-weapons experts. It was given to a policeman, who wrapped it in a towel and put it in the glove compartment of his unit; for 3 days it was unaccounted for.

Put on the stand, Longet reiterated her innocence and pleaded for mercy because her three young children needed her. The jury acquitted her of felony manslaughter but convicted her of criminal negligence, a misdemeanor and sentenced her to pay a small fine and spend 30 days in jail. As a generous gesture, Judge Lohr allowed Longet to choose the days she served, believing that this arrangement would allow her to spend the most time with her children. Longet chose to work off most of her sentence on weekends. Once the trial was over, she took off for a vacation with her defense attorney Ron Austin. Austin left his wife and children to do so. Longet and Austin later married and remain together residing in Aspen.

Longet has never performed again. After the criminal trial, the Sabich family initiated civil proceedings to sue Longet. The case was eventually settled out of court for a large monetary settlement, with the proviso that Longet never tell or write about her story. They also demanded that Claudine withdraw from public circulation her recording of "Bang Bang, My Baby Shot Me Down."


Trivia

The incident of criminal negligence in the death of Sabich was the subject of a song written by Mick Jagger which was ultimately cut from the 1980 Rolling Stones album Emotional Rescue, although copies have surfaced due to piracy over the years. The song, titled simply "Claudine", contains the lyrics "Claudine's back in jail again/She only does it at weekends/Claudine Oh, Claudine/Now only Spider knows for sure/But he ain't talkin' about it any more/Is he, Claudine?/There's blood in the chalet/And blood in the snow/Washed her hands of the whole damn show/The best thing you could do, Claudine/Shot him once right through the head/Shot him twice right through the chest/The judge says it was an accident, Claudine/Accidents will happen (In the best homes)/What about the children, baby?/Poor, poor children/Now I threaten my wife with a gun/I always leave the safety on/I recommend it/Claudine/Now she pistol whipped me once or twice/But she never tried to take my life(What do you think about that)/Claudine/The prettiest girl I ever seen/I saw you on the movie screen/Hope you don't try to make a sacrifice of me/Claudine (Don't get trigger happy with me)/Don't wave a gun at me (Claudine)"
Season 1 Episode 18 of Saturday Night Live featured a skit titled "The Claudine Longet Invitational," which parodied the shooting incident.[1]
A Season 1 episode of "Gilmore Girls" features Rory's friend, Lane, having bought an eclectic range of CDs. Rory responds, "I *must* listen to anyone named Claudine Longet." They play the CD, and Lorelai, on discovering who they're listening to, says "the chick who shot the skier?...Wow, renaissance woman."
Claudine recorded a version of the Lynsey De Paul song "Sugar Me".

Tom Selleck
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia



Birth name Thomas William Selleck
Born January 29, 1945
Detroit, Michigan, USA
Height 6'4"
Notable roles "Thomas Magnum" in
Magnum P.I.

Thomas William Selleck (born January 29, 1945 in Detroit, Michigan) is an American actor, screenwriter and film producer, best known for his starring role on the long-running television show Magnum P.I..




Biography

Early life

Born in Detroit to Ukrainian Rusyn parents, but raised in Los Angeles, Selleck did modeling work and attended the University of Southern California on a basketball scholarship; he majored in business administration, however a drama coach suggested he try acting. He then studied acting at the Beverly Hills Playhouse under Milton Katselas.


Early career

Selleck began his career with bit parts in smaller movies, including the over-the-top Myra Breckinridge and Russ Meyer's The Seven Minutes. He also appeared in number of TV series, mini-series and TV movies. Selleck also had a recurring role in the 1970s as Lance White in The Rockford Files. Lance was very trusting and always lucky, much to the surprise of Jim Rockford, the show's star private eye played by James Garner. White would frequently say to Rockford, "Don't worry, Jim, clues will turn up" and then a clue would just turn up, much to Rockford's consternation, for whom obtaining clues required hard work and hard knocks. Selleck's character was based on one played in Garner's earlier TV series Maverick (1957) by Selleck lookalike Wayde Preston in that series' highest-rated episode, "The Saga of Waco Williams." Ironically Selleck, after years of little interest, was cast as Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark that same year. Magnum's producers would not release the actor and he had to pass on the role, which then went to Harrison Ford.


Movie stardom

Selleck starred in a number of film roles during and after Magnum; among the most notable were as an acrophobic police detective in Runaway and as a stand-in father in Three Men and a Baby. He also played the lead role in the Australian western Quigley Down Under. His other films included High Road to China, Lassiter, Her Alibi, An Innocent Man (film), Folks!, Christopher Columbus: The Discovery, Mr. Baseball, In & Out and The Love Letter.

Selleck had a very successful recurring guest-star television role on the popular sitcom Friends as "Richard," an ophthalmologist friend of Monica Geller's father and, eventually, one of Monica's (ex-)boyfriends. During filming, when he would show up on stage, he would receive long standing ovations. This led to a change in Friends' filming style; the live audience was removed, and laugh tracks were used instead. Selleck reprised his role as Richard several times throughout the show's ten years on the air.

Selleck has also appeared in a number of made-for-TV movies in recent years. In particular, he has sought to help bring back to popularity the western, often playing one of that genre's typical characters but thrust into a modern context.

Surprising many of his fans, Selleck unexpectedly played the role of General Dwight D. Eisenhower in the History Channel's 2004 made-for-TV movie Ike: Countdown to D-Day. The movie showed the planning, politics, and preparation for the 1944 Invasion of Normandy, and Selleck was critically lauded for playing a cool, calm Eisenhower.

Most recently, Selleck has appeared in a recurring role on the acclaimed ABC drama Boston Legal as Ivan Tiggs, the troubled ex-husband of Shirley Schmidt (Candice Bergen).


Magnum P.I.

Tom Selleck played the role of Thomas Magnum in 1980 after six failed TV pilots. The show would go on for eight seasons and 162 episodes until 1988. Selleck was famous for wearing a Hawaiian-style aloha shirt and also wearing a Detroit Tigers baseball cap. In the series, Magnum would drive a Ferrari 308 GTS. Tom Selleck will not star in the upcoming Magnum P.I. film, because he has been considered too old but may appear in a cameo role. George Clooney, Vince Vaughn, and Ben Affleck have been rumoured for the role.


Awards & Accolades

On April 28, 2000, he received an honorary doctorate from Pepperdine University. He was chosen because of his outstanding character and ethic. He is a board member of the non-profit Michael Josephson Institute of Ethics and co-founder of the Character Counts Coalition. Selleck received a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 1986. The star is situated at 6925 Hollywood Blvd.

Golden Apple Awards- 1982 Male Star of the year
Golden Apple Awards- 1983 Male Star of the year
Emmy Awards- 1984 Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Golden Globes- 1985 Best Performance by an Actor in a TV-Series-Drama
Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame- 1986 6925 Hollywood Blvd

Personal life

Tom Selleck was married to model Jacqueline Ray from 1970 to 1982 from which he adopted her son, Kevin, from a previous marriage. Selleck's second marriage was to Jillie Mack, they married in 1987. They have one daughter, Hannah Selleck. Selleck also dated Mimi Rogers in the early 1980's. He reportedly lives in Abbotsford, British Columbia.


Politics

Selleck is a member of the National Rifle Association. On May 20, 1999 He sparred with Rosie O'Donnell on The Rosie O'Donnell Show on the issue of gun control and an ad in which he appeared which supported the NRA. Selleck was invited to the show to promote his latest movie, The Love Letter, but found himself instead defending his position on gun ownership. Selleck refused to be drawn into a heated discussion by saying: "It's your show, and you can talk about it after I leave". O'Donnell was highly criticized for this, which led her to make an apology to Selleck by saying: "For him feeling embarrassed and humiliated by me, I strongly do apologize to him personally, but I do not apologize for my feelings about this issue gun control."[1]

Though often considered a conservative, Selleck describes himself politically as "a registered independent with a lot of libertarian leanings"[2].

Ann Jillian
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Ann Jillian (born Ann Jura Nauseda on January 29, 1950 in Cambridge, Massachusetts) is an American actress born to Roman Catholic Lithuanian immigrant parents.

Jillian has been acting since 1961 when she played "Little Bo Peep" in the Disney film, Babes In Toyland. She appeared in the Rosalind Russell- Natalie Wood 1962 movie version of Gypsy. She later became a regular on the 1960s sitcom Hazel and did voice acting for Scooby Doo and Sealab 2020 in the early 1970s.

She is best known for her early 1980s TV series, It's a Living, a sitcom that elevated Jillian to sex symbol status. She was last signed into this series and received last place billing. During her time on the series for the ABC run, she portrayed Mae West in a made-for-TV film. When the series was revived in syndication, Ann returned for a season, but then departed because of health problems.

Jillian appeared in more than 25 films, mostly for TV. She also starred in two short-lived sitcoms, an early 1980s effort entitled Jennifer Slept Here in which she played a ghost in a variation of The Ghost and Mrs. Muir and a 1989 series entitled, simply, Ann Jillian.

Jillian married Andy Murcia, a Chicago police sergeant, in 1977 and shortly thereafter Murcia retired to manage his wife's career. In the mid-1980s, the then 35-year-old actress made headlines when she was diagnosed with breast cancer and she became a vocal advocate for cancer research and prevention. Her own cancer was beaten following a double mastectomy and her battle with the disease was chronicled in the top-rated 1988 made-for-TV film, The Ann Jillian Story in which Jillian portrayed herself.

Jillian has continued to act and had a son in 1992. Her TV and film credits have been sporadic since the late 1990s, as she decided to devote herself to raising her son Andrew Joseph and to promoting breast cancer issues. Today, she mostly works as a motivational speaker and also performs as a singer in corporate and symphony pops circles. Ann, husband and son reside in the San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles.

Heather Graham
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


Birth name Heather Joan Graham
Born January 29, 1970 (age 36)
Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA

Height 5 ft 8 in (1.73 m)

Heather Joan Graham (born January 29, 1970, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin) is an American film and television actress.





Childhood and early career

Her father, Jim, is a retired FBI agent and her mother, Joan, is a noted author of children's books. Graham has a younger sister, Aimee, who is also an aspiring actress and writer. The family followed a strict traditional Catholic upbringing of Irish descent. Heather has since estranged herself from the Catholic Church, saying it is: "made up of closed-minded men who believe a woman's sexuality is evil...Why do I have to do what all these men are saying?" [1]. Heather has practiced transcendental meditation since 1991 [2]. She is a convert to Hinduism.

Spending her early years in Virginia, Graham attended North Springfield Elementary School in Springfield, Virginia. Her family then moved to the Conejo Valley, Los Angeles, California, where she attended Sumac Elementary School, Lindero Canyon Middle School, and Agoura High School where she graduated in 1988.

Initially, Heather's parents were supportive of her budding acting career. However, her parents were concerned that she should not appear in any movie featuring sex or nudity. Breaking away from that mold, Heather appeared fully nude in several scenes in her breakout role in Boogie Nights. Heather is currently estranged from her parents, who are still devout Catholics.

In 1991, she appeared in the TV series Twin Peaks as Annie Blackburn, Agent Cooper's second-season love interest.

After high school, Graham enrolled in extension classes of the University of California at Los Angeles (UCLA), and she also met the actor James Woods. Their subsequent romantic involvement might have led to her being cast in the movie Diggstown (1992), which starred Woods. After two years had passed, Graham stopped taking classes at UCLA to pursue acting full time, over her parents' objections. She then moved to Hollywood, Calif., where she worked different jobs while continuing to establish herself as an actress.


Film and television career

As a supporting actress, Graham was cast in a number of parts that brought her critical notice, including Nadine in Drugstore Cowboy (1989). However, her breakthrough role was that of 1970s porn starlet Roller Girl in Boogie Nights (1997), for which she received several award nominations. Her first starring role was in 1999 with her lead role as Felicity Shagwell in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me. She also appeared in the music video for "American Woman"- a song which Lenny Kravitz covered for the film's soundtrack. More recently, she starred as Mary Kelly in the film From Hell (2001), based on the story of Jack the Ripper.

Although Heather has been featured in mainstream films, she has also been cast in a number of independent films. Some of those films, like 2002's The Guru, have brought her critical praise. She also starred in the less successful Killing Me Softly.

She was named by People Magazine as one of the "50 Most Beautiful People in the World 2001" [3].

She also played herself on one episode of the TV series Sex and the City. She was given special guest-star status on several episodes of NBC-TV's Scrubs during its fourth season (2004-2005), and also appeared in a small role as a teacher in an episode of Fox's Arrested Development. In 2005, Graham became the spokeswoman and TV model for the Garnier brand of hair care products. Graham's print ad for Skyy vodka, which was photographed in 1993 (titled "#3, Entourage") is still appearing in national magazines today as well.

Heather's most recent project was starring in the ABC-TV comedy series Emily's Reasons Why Not in 2006. However, ABC-TV announced that the show was canceled after its first airing on January 9, 2006. Because they print their covers weeks in advance, and they did not expect the quick cancellation, Life Magazine did a cover story on Graham two weeks later in their January 27, 2006 issue, and they referred to her as "TV's sexiest star." [4] [5]

Funny motor insurance claims(even in other countries)

"The accident happened because I had one eye on the lorry in
front, one eye on the pedestrian and the other on the car
behind."

"I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary
than I thought."

"I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the
hood. I realised the car was on fire so took my dog and
smothered it with a blanket."

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the
accident? A: Travelled by bus?

The claimant had collided with a cow. The questions and
answers on the claim form were - Q: What warning was
given by you? A: Horn. Q: What warning was given by the
other party? A: Moo.

"I started to turn and it was at this point I noticed a
camel and an elephant tethered at the verge. This
distraction caused me to lose concentration and hit a
bollard."

"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front
suddenly broke."

"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight"

"I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would
not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was
any risk."


"Windscreen broken. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo."

"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I
hit him again"

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my
mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning
of its intention."

"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way"

"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face"

"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"

"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone
pole."

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way
home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up
obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."

"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when
my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."

"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and
vanished."

"I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later
found in a ditch by some stray cows."

"Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with
a tree I don't have."

"I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I
put my head through it."

"The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of
times before I hit him."

"I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at
the wheel and had an accident."

"As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared
in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before."

"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck
a pedestrian."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into another
vehicle."

"I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing
my hat found that I had a fractured skull."

"I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other
side of the road when I struck him."

"The pedestrian had no idea which way to run as I ran over
him."

"I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced
off the roof of my car."

"The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a
small car with a big mouth."

"The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to
swerve out of the way when I struck the front end."

"The gentleman behind me struck me on the backside. He then
went to rest in a bush with just his rear end showing. "

"I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned
the wheel to what I thought was enough and found myself in
a different direction going the opposite way."

"I was backing my car out of the driveway in the usual manner,
when it was struck by the other car in the same place it had
been struck several times before."

"When I saw I could not avoid a collision I stepped on the gas
and crashed into the other car."

"The accident happened when the right front door of a car came
round the corner without giving a signal."

"No one was to blame for the accident but it would never have
happened if the other driver had been alert."

"I was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other
vehicle. The driver and passengers then left immediately for a
vacation with injuries."

"The pedestrian ran for the pavement, but I got him."

"I saw her look at me twice. She appeared to be making slow
progress when we met on impact."

"The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car
out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle."

"My car got hit by a submarine." (The Navy informed the wife
of a submariner that the craft was due in port. She drove to
the base to meet her husband and parked at the end of the
slip where the sub was to berth. An inexperienced ensign was
conning the sub and it rammed the end of the slip, breaking
a section away, causing her car to fall into the water. The
Navy paid the compensation claim.

Good morning, WA2K listeners and contributors.

Hey, edgar. Your song sounded as though someone was in denial. <smile>. Thanks, Texas for the music that describes many lost loves.

Hey, BioBob, know most of your celebs for today, and we love your accident funnies, especially the one about the cow.

When our Raggedy arrives, we will comment further, hawkman, but until then here is a song by Claudine Longet who seemed to have gotten lucky or something of that nature. Everyone has done this one, folks, but I was surprised to find that the French lady did it as well.

Cry Me A River

Now you say you're lonely
You cry the long night through
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you

Now you say you're sorry
For being so untrue
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you

You drove me, nearly drove me, out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember, I remember, all that you said?
You told me love was too plebeian
Told me you were through with me and

Now you say you love me
Well, just to prove that you do
Come on and cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
I cried a river over you
I cried a river...over you...

Back later with news of the SAG awards.

Good morning.

Bring on the SAG news, Letty. I really enjoyed seeing the Mary Tyler Moore cast and the Julie Andrews segment. Was amazed at how many well-know actors passed away last year.




to be continued:

Conclusion of names to faces:
W. C. Fields, Victor Mature, Katharine Ross, Claudine Longet, Tom Selleck, Ann Jillian, and Oprah Winfrey

Oops. Here's Tom.