I Fall to Pieces

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Lately, I've been noticing that my body is completely falling apart. I'm not quite sure what happened, but fell asleep one night and woke up a total mess.

My skin looks old and wrinkly, my back hurts, I have more doctor's appointments for this and that and I just want to know one tiny thing...

What the heck happened to me?! I'm not even 30!

Has there ever come a time in your life that you've just felt completely past your physical prime and felt like an ogre? Like a mess? Like you are living in the body of someone you don't even recognize and find incredibly unattractive? Did the feeling pass or did you just get used to it or are you self-loathing?

I'm not too worried. If I make enough money I can just buy a whole new body! I'll get a taller one next time.

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While you're mulling that over, a musical interlude:

I Fall to Pieces
(Trisha Yearwood and Aaron Neville)

I fall to pieces
Each time I see you again
I fall to pieces
How can I be just your friend

You want me to act
Like we've never kissed
You want me to forget
Pretend we've never met
And I try and I try
But I haven't yet
You walk by and I fall to pieces

I fall to pieces
Each time someone speaks your name
I fall to pieces
Time only acts to the play

You tell me to find someone else to love
Someone who loves me too
The way you used to do
But each time I go out with someone new
You walk by and I fall to pieces

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I don't know where this beak came from!

One night I went to bed, a hairy freak with lantern eyes and the next morning I woke up, and there's this .... thing stuck on my face!

HELP ME!

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I had a friend who was an excellent country singer - she used to sing this in bars. Since she was pretty, had a nice figure, pleasant personality and great voice, I dropped her ass. Who needs friends like that!

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What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

You get your dog back, your truck back, your house back, your wife back....

Just wait sugar, it gets worse. Smile

My biggest problem is that I keep hurting myself while I'm trying to get in shape.

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Someone gave me a picture that they recently took of me at a luncheon. Everybody thought that I looked great in that picture. If I thought that I REALLY looked like that picture, I'd hang myself!

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ever since i turned 40, things hurt that never hurt before.

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See, I get around the photo problem by refusing to have them taken. They always make me cringe, even when I was a kid.

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Sug, wait'll you turn 30. The morning of your birthday, regardless of whatever you were doing the night before or the week before, and regardless of how physically fit you are, you wake up with a backache.

When you turn 40, the ache tends to be somewhere in the GI tract (pretty much anywhere in it; not limited to one particular place or another).

These pains go away, of course, it's not like you have a backache for a decade or anything.

PS I take about as many daily medications as my mother does, and she's 29 1/2 years older than I am.

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Getting older is pretty discouraging. But you have to admit it's a whole lot better than the alternative. The only people not getting older are dead.

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I don't know if my parents lied to me about when I was born, or what, but my 30th birthday passed by entirely benignly, I got all cocky about "hey, that wasn't bad 'tall!", then got smacked upside the head by my (recent) 32nd birthday. Maybe it was that the sozlet was about a month old when I turned 30, so I didn't have a spare ounce of energy to devote to introspection (or extraspection, otherwise known as looking in the mirror.)

But just recently I've noticed all that stuff. Aches, pains, and what the $%#@ happened to my skin?! (Note: Mango Body Butter by The Body Shop is some goooooood stuff, if way too expensive.)

Not... liking... it. Evil or Very Mad

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After 25 it started slowly going downhill...by the time I hit 30, it was just not as shocking but certainly still there and growing. Now that Im 35, well...its fine, not much of a big change...but, I can wait till Im 40...I think thats gonna hurt...lots.
Would much rather look and feel like something around 17-25 but, didnt realize it when it was here so, what can you do now but hope its not too entirely bad too quick.

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As much as I love my 30s for the sense of well-being I feel, I hate it for the aches. I have to shift postions at night several times or something starts to ache. Weird things get pins and needles. Like my back where I was resting it against a wall. My butt if I sit too long. Very weird. I get an ache in one shoulder, one hip, both knees and my lower back. I stopped the jump in aging when I quit smoking. My hands a wrinkly and dry even in humid weather. I get hung over after 2 drinks.

And, I too hurt myself when I try to get back in shape. I went for a long walk on sunday only to return with a sore hip.

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Life always seems so good five years ago.

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Oh, I know so well what you are talking about. I can't believe all the aches and pains in my body. I'm just glad I'm used to working out regularly so I usually don't hurt myself doing that - usually...

And could somebody tell me who put these thighs on me? These are definitely not mine! Were the heck did my waist go?

But then I go swimming and watch all these young girls. And guess what - most of them look much worse than me! Ha!

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See, the getting older thing doesn't bother me at all.

Though I have freaked out at times, processing new employees (at my old job), checking their birth records and thinking that there was no way they were old enough to work,..but they were Shocked

!
I still don't believe that anyone born after 1980 could possibly be old enough to drive Laughing

The only gripe I have (aches aside,..I've accepted them :wink: ) is that hair is springing up in places that it just doesn't belong Shocked

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Yeah well JerryR that's not too bad to have hair springing up when you're a man, not so good when you're a woman (not that you turn into a woman on occasion, or not that there's anything wrong with that!)

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I am a beautiful me.

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Okay, you dont count countzero..you're just perfect and always will be....
this is about the rest of us un lucky peeps

Any tips you can share with us or would that be divulging top secret info?

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I just got my haircut today.....still look like a$$.

I need a nap.

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