...yelled NOOO!!!!! Can't...survive...copyright...infringement...!!
He died with a terrible cough, and much spilling of sputum, and then Gina woke up, to the surprise of everyone who thought her dead...
Zilla jumped and....
knocked over a Captain Morgan billboard. Zilla, thrown off kilter, pitched backwards, sending the billboard straight up his crack, futher proving that we all have a little Captain in us.
The night, which had started off horribly, was now shaping up to be the best night of my life. After all, it's not every day that you get to.....
cavfancier wrote:...yelled NOOO!!!!! Can't...survive...copyright...infringement...!!
He died with a terrible cough, and much spilling of sputum, and then Gina woke up, to the surprise of everyone who thought her dead...
Thanks Cav....nothing like ruining my great ending.... :wink:
Kristie wrote:cavfancier wrote:...yelled NOOO!!!!! Can't...survive...copyright...infringement...!!
He died with a terrible cough, and much spilling of sputum, and then Gina woke up, to the surprise of everyone who thought her dead...
Thanks Cav....nothing like ruining my great ending.... :wink:
Hee hee, sometimes it's just in the timing. I'm not too picky about which ending people want to go from. That's part of the creative process.
Kristie wrote:The night, which had started off horribly, was now shaping up to be the best night of my life. After all, it's not every day that you get to.....
eulogize your mother-in-law.
I got the call at 3:00 a.m. You know, the time of night you've learned to hope for wrong numbers. I picked up the phone only to have my hackles rise when I heard the voice on the line.
It was a voice that I had heard a thousand times, how could one forget the sound of their wifes voice, but after she died in the car crash last spring it was the last voice I had expected to hear.
The man got up from the floor. Although outnumbered he has held his own. As the remaining three advanced on him, he ...
kept holding his own--he held it straight out for the three remaining busty mermaids, who began orally pleasuring him--until it squirted him in the eye, waking him from the strangest wet dream he'd ever had.
Madge picked up the rusty crowbar. It felt good in her hands. Heavy. She cackled in the dark tool shed, wondering if this was the right tool for the job. The Pall Mall hanging from her cracked, lipstick-smeared mouth deposited another tiny pile of ashes onto the slatted wood floor. "Yes", she said out loud in the darkness, "this will do nicely."
She went back into the house. She opened the door to the bedroom. She looked at her lover's shape in the bed as she approached. She lifted the crowbar over her head. And then, just as she began to bring her arm down for the death blow...
...it was ripped off by a giant robot eagle, the sinister creation of Dr. Flavius, her chiropractor and stalker.
Jim stared at his llama and was bemused. The chimpanzee riding it was just so cute. While not partial to chimps in general, Jim thought...
...if I tweak the recipe just a bit it might taste better than last time.
Looking around the cafe, Bob saw a man walk in with a trenchcoat. The man reached the front counter and began screaming in a language Bob had never heard before. The man threw open his trenchcoat and...
...shouted out "Gleek fer ditten floog!" which roughly translated means "That's where my umbrella went, mind if I open it?"
Priscilla was moody. Brad just wasn't the man he used to be, something had changed....
cavfancier wrote:...shouted out "Gleek fer ditten floog!" which roughly translated means "That's where my umbrella went, mind if I open it?"
Priscilla was moody. Brad just wasn't the man he used to be, something had changed....
and everyone suspected it had to do with his botched penis enlargment surgery. Just goes to show you that size DOES matter.
I was feeling rather happy that day and I sauntered along the boulavard thinking....
I was feeling rather happy that day and I sauntered along the boulavard thinking....[/quote]
"Step on a crack; break your mother's back."
I took six-month old Dolly to the Vet this morning to be spayed. Two year old Maddy keeps looking for her around the house. He keeps jumping up into my lap, looking at me with the most pitiful eyes that seem to be asking:
BumbleBeeBoogie wrote:
I took six-month old Dolly to the Vet this morning to be spayed. Two year old Maddy keeps looking for her around the house. He keeps jumping up into my lap, looking at me with the most pitiful eyes that seem to be asking:
How long after the surgery do I have to wait before I can mount her?
I patted him lovingly and told him,
"You're neutered, silly thing. Now go lick where your balls used to be."
The house was on fire, but Phillip had no fears because...
...he was standing outside with the empty can of gasoline enjoying the sound of his sizzling parents.
The fire trucks arrived only to find...
...that it was all a dream. "Boys, that's enough opium I think, " Marshall Brown said to his men.
The night was stormy, and Al was driving madly, not under the influence of any drugs, but solely on the determination to find out what happened at the orphanage he was raised in as a lad. He got there and Sister Maria was waiting by the gates. She told him....
..."You'll have to come back during normal business hours, boy! Everyone's asleep. You're just as inconsiderate as you ever were!"
The sun was beating down on her wide-brimmed hat and the cool water from the stream was now hot as bath water in her dented canteen. She hoped it was only a little further to...
...orgasm. This Desert Storm fetish of her boyfriend's was tiring, and no longer fun.
Life had been good for Peter, for the most part. There was however, one thing that haunted him....
...about his extra thumb. It stood straight up and always pointed in the direction of the wind.
"I don't know why you think that's funny!" she yelled as the screen door slammed behind her. He followed her out and...
grabbed her trailing ponytail. As he whipped her head to face him, he heard a sickening crack and she fell into a lifeless heap at the foot of the steps. He had broken her pretty little neck. The same neck his fingers itched to wrap around and squeeze mercilessly.
