He says he doesnt love me but I don't believe him please help

Please help me I don't know what to believe anymore. I've been madly in love with a man for 4 years. We have never dated but we may as well have. He came out of a terrible relationship with a woman he ended up having a child with. He's very confusing and sends mixed signals. In my heart I know I love him and in my gut I feel he truly loves me. But I've been second guessing my gut for a long while now. Every so often he seems to purposely hurt me very bad. He will send all of the signals he usually does when he's in love but claims different. When he has money he will buy me things I need and he tells his friends he loves me sometimes hell get cuddly and he wants nothing but to be around me. He says over text I'm different and in person when he looks at me he can't help but love me. I'm very confused obviously.. hell freak out mostly over text or in person while he's still mad about a fight we recently had over text. But not at random in person. He'll say he doesn't love me. That I'm childish and he doesn't want the drama. When I'm absolutely sure I have very little other than what he stretches and creates into a huge deal. A few days later hell be fine. I'm worried he truly doesn't love me and he's talking to other women and my parents are right about him only wanting me when convenient to himself. But in the same breath I feel he really needs me but doesn't know how to show it like he has said and he is scared to commit himself to something long term again because even though we are long term it becomes more evident to some people when they have a label. I've tried everything nd I don't know what else to try to get him to push the fear away and push my flaws away and realize I have so much more good than bad to offer so I figured I'd try an outside source. He causes me a lot of pain but even more pain is caused by not being around him. I feel like with advice I can conquer this and that when we are really committed there will be no need to stretch drama and create problems. Because then we're both not worried about both our own and the others boundaries . I'm in desperate need of help this is my last chance. Please don't let me down I'm not ready to give up on my soul mate.