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what do you think of my poem? I dare everyone that reads to reply :P

 
 
Reply Sat 28 Mar, 2015 05:23 pm
What do you guys think?

You used to text me good morning
When I was too tired and wanted to go back to sleep
The phone would go off so loud; disturbing my dreams
Even though I took it for granted back then
I’d do anything to get it back
You used rub my forehead when I had a headache
That’s been replaced with “I just don’t ******* care”


I still smile at the old texts
You saying I had a mind you fell in love with
That I electrify your life
And that you’d feel so lost without me
That’s one of the things that still give me faith
The one that wanted to be with me forever
The one that cried over me when they thought I was dying
And the one that thought I was “the one”
Is now calling me a ******* needy leach

You don’t seem like the same person
The one that used to love and care for me
Feels like they’re dead

I remember making you that promise
About not being afraid to be themselves and live life to the fullest
That turned you into a social butterfly that would rather spend time with people in person
Than to talk to a lonely person in need
The equivalent of a rich snob

I want my lover back
The one that used to tuck me in at night
And tell me to sleep well
I still find it odd
I want to be with that person
Even if they’re not living as a man anymore
11 months past and I’m still crying
All I have left is those texts and voicemails

And no John, I am not bat **** crazy
Trying my damndest
To bring back a relationship where two people
Loved and cared for each other deeply
What’s so bat **** crazy about that?
All it shows is
That I’ll fight for who I love
The only bat **** crazy thing I did was

…Catfish
Something you do when you’re too insecure
To show what you really look like
When someone doesn’t notice you as the real you
When you think it’s the only way for someone to think you’re amazing
The reason why I did it was none of those things
It was just to prove that we were compatible
Because you thought we were a 60% match


I know you will come back
Even if it’s not forever
We can make it happen
I know we will live together
Even if I have to wait 3 months
At least one of us has faith

I miss you everyday
I WILL NOT stop until I succeed


…And I will
Watch me

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Type: Question • Score: 0 • Views: 1,121 • Replies: 1
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jespah
 
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Reply Sun 29 Mar, 2015 06:49 am
I think your poems are about someone with whom you have an unhealthy obsession.

I also think you'll get a lot more feedback if you take your poems to a site that actually is for writers, Wattpad.
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