9
   

Warning! Salt needed to kill zombies!

 
 
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 12:23 pm
With all the hooplah about zombies these days and even a tv series devoted to the menace, I feel it necessary to warn all about this critical fact:

No matter how destuctive a force you may use, you cannot discomzombulate one of these monsters. They simply reconfigure in the undead state.

Here is the solution I learned while a small child being scared shoeless watching zombie movies: A liberal application of salt will cause the monster to shrivel up and get dead again.

I suggest the most effective anti zombie weapon would be a 20 gauge loaded with rock salt. I've never seen a zombie, though; so haven't tried it.

Just sayin
 
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 12:38 pm
I think that is a brilliant idea. Of course one needs to prepare for the zombie apocalypse. My boys have brilliant ideas on how we would handle it if it did indeed occur.

Of course we prefer the Walking Dead zombies to the WWZ zombies - the lumbering kind would definitely be more manageable. Plus all you have to do is put your couch in front of the door to keep them out.

What happens when you run out of salt?

0 Replies
 
InfraBlue
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 01:00 pm
@neologist,
neologist wrote:
With all the hooplah about zombies these days and even a tv series devoted to the menace, I feel it necessary to warn all about this critical fact:

No matter how destuctive a force you may use, you cannot discomzombulate one of these monsters. They simply reconfigure in the undead state.

Where do you get this idea from? Even in the tv series, after they've been shot they're--disanimated.
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 01:07 pm
Bonus Boston is going to have a zombie convention this weekend if you are interested in it.

I may have to bring some salt to work.
roger
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 01:35 pm
Sounds like a bunch of hooey, but I'm glad I've got a good store of salt cuz everybody is now going to start hoarding the stuff.

Ah, do zombies look anything like garden slugs?
Lordyaswas
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 01:51 pm
@roger,
Slug zombies do.
roger
 
  3  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 02:00 pm
@Lordyaswas,
Salt will work, then.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 02:12 pm
@Linkat,
sorry it is next weekend - although this will give me more time to prepare for the invasion.
0 Replies
 
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 02:13 pm
@InfraBlue,
Quote:
Where do you get this idea from? Even in the tv series, after they've been shot they're--disanimated.


Only if you shoot them in the head.

InfraBlue
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 02:55 pm
@mismi,
mismi wrote:

Quote:
Where do you get this idea from? Even in the tv series, after they've been shot they're--disanimated.


Only if you shoot them in the head.



Ahh.

It was tragic when, in the tv series, one of the main character's young daughter goes missing only to appear out of a barn with a group of zombies, herself zombified, and had to be shot.
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 03:00 pm
@Linkat,
Just order in Chinese food. Put soy sauce in your squirt gun and you should be good to go.
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 03:20 pm
@InfraBlue,
Quote:
It was tragic when, in the tv series, one of the main character's young daughter goes missing only to appear out of a barn with a group of zombies, herself zombified, and had to be shot.


Very. The webisodes for the ones turned zombie you see in the episodes are so sad. The zombie apocalypse is no playground that's for sure.
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 03:29 pm
@mismi,
Quote:
The zombie apocalypse is no playground that's for sure.


I'm scared -- maybe I should call in sick or zombified next Friday to avoid this influx of the undead.
0 Replies
 
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 03:53 pm
@InfraBlue,
InfraBlue wrote:
Where do you get this idea from? Even in the tv series, after they've been shot they're--disanimated.
You're probably not old enough to remember thereal zombie movies. Google "zombie salt" and see what you get.

'Course, some of this may be just the ruminations of my 5 year old brain.
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 04:00 pm
@jespah,
Oriental zombies? I thought they were all calypsonian.
Oh wait!
Zombie jamboree took place
in New York Cemetary. . .

Back to back
Belly to belly
well I don't give a damn
cause I've done that already . . .
etc

So, they could be anywhere
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 04:03 pm
@neologist,
neologist wrote:
... my 5 year old brain.


Your brain isn't old enough to drink.
neologist
 
  2  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 04:05 pm
@jespah,
My 5 year old brain is a lot older now
0 Replies
 
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 06:42 pm
@neologist,
I Googled Zombie Salt and got this....

http://rt.com/usa/drug-bath-salt-zombie-321/

What the what?
chai2
 
  3  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 07:05 pm
@Lordyaswas,
Lordyaswas wrote:

Slug zombies do.


I set out a dish of beer for that.
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Jun, 2014 07:12 pm
@mismi,
mismi wrote:

Quote:
It was tragic when, in the tv series, one of the main character's young daughter goes missing only to appear out of a barn with a group of zombies, herself zombified, and had to be shot.


Very. The webisodes for the ones turned zombie you see in the episodes are so sad. The zombie apocalypse is no playground that's for sure.



You know what I don't get?

Why they don't pick them off here and there while they're sitting or standing around doing their normal guard duty up in the tower.

Oh no, they wait until some weird thing happens, and have to battle 50 or 60 of them at the same time.

Crap, over the course of a day, you could de-brain a bunch of them. Ya just poke 'em hard through the eyes with a salty pole, through the fence.
Then, eventually all the meat that could walk around on the planet would eventually be gone.

When the zompocalypse comes, I'll be picking 'em off, making the world a safer place.
 

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