not suppose to be her anymore

btw, there's a police car sitting outside my house. I haven't done anything, but I'm still feeling guilty.

I better hide the mallomars.

I've heard the police near you are real marshmallows.

My Windows key is third from the left on both of my computers - ?

Does it look anything like this? Because this looks nothing like a window.

I think it looks like Schrödinger's cat's box, transcending the space-time continuum.

I dare not touch it.

Yeah, I guess I'm just a dumb bunny (slits throat)

<puts mame in schrondingers box to see what happens next>

No, it looks like this - a slightly wobbly window, but a window!

Oh, that was on my Windows 7 laptop - on the Windows 8 laptop, it's straighter - more windowlike!

My responses and what I was typing started not making sense and I was having a hard time comprehending because my oxygen was dropping and I wasn't aware it was happening.

I apologize and I felt I should at least tell you what was happening.

Then you should have opened a window.

What I did do was go outside to get some fresh air. I walked out the back door and collapsed on the concrete patio.

When my husband came home from work, he found me and called 911. I woke up to the medics working on me. I had slammed the right side of my face on the concrete as well as my arm.

I look like I've been in a car wreck and my arm is swollen, discolored and painful. I'll give my arm a few days and if it doesn't get better then I will go to a doctor.

I signed the ama about going to the hospital since I was just there a little over a month ago for the same reason.

btw I check my oxygen level many times a day and had recently checked it and it was fine.

I am truly sorry for your loss and yes I mean that.
Need to move on? I didn't know grief has a time line. You wrote it is simple, no it is not! I never said or wrote my suffering isn't as important than others.

Interesting TTL. You probably know I had a similarly weird (but different) thing happen to me lately, some combo of a blood pressure pill and me, scary stuff.
I'm on a new pill that acts differently - so far so good. Take care of yourself, ya hear?

Yes I read what you went through. osso I am glad you are ok.
Thank you for caring.
My sister didn't take drugs, didn't smoke and didn't drink alcohol.

I really don't have any time for this. I'm not bothered about how you feel about my loss. I've dealt with it, I don't go on about it. Unless you're clinically depressed it really is that simple. Moping and moaning as much as you are, this long after the event is not normal. You may be clinically depressed, make an appointment with a doctor, get yourself diagnosed properly. A lot of people suffer from depression, it's nothing to be ashamed of. You need to see a doctor, if only to rule this out.

If you're not clinically depressed, you need to suck it up right now. Find something positive you can do to help others. Are there any issues, situations your dad/sister cared deeply about? If not, what killed them, cancer, stroke, diabetes, what? There's something you can put your effort into, a charity you can raise funds for that will do your loved ones proud. Focus on that, it's a lot better than feeling sorry for yourself.

I am clinically depressed. You wrote don't be ashamed seriously? It isn't that simple.

I cant understand what iis happening, My oxegen level is in the 70, I will call my husband for help

You need to seek treatment specifically for clinical depression. Nothing can fall into place until you sort this out.

Stephen Fry suffers from depression, over here he has the status of National Treasure.

I have been to a doctor and was diagnosed with depression. This has been an ongoing process.

I did go to the doctor regarding my fall. I fractured my upper leg, my arm and broke 3 ribs.

Grief is dealt with differently by everyone, or least I think it is and no one should tell someone how they should or should not feel. I am adjusting to life without my parents and sister. It hasn't been easy and maybe it will never be easy. People should not judge others by the way they deal with the loss of a loved one.