Boy, I'm going to your profile and put you on ignore. Then I'm going to use the back button to come back and thumb down your post, as I see some other discerning reader has already done.
I imagine as soon as the moderators review the board, the spam post will be removed.
I always meant to make an update to my original post. I can barely stay awake right now though, so that'll have to wait until I can think coherently and don't have to fight to keep my eyes open.