The Horror! Lost in a Corn Maze! What would you do?

Odd . . . no maize puns yet.

@Green Witch,

Green Witch wrote:

The maze thing (aka AgraTourism) is actually a great boon for farmers, especially smaller ones who don't own a gazillion acres of soybeans and alfalfa. Most of these farmers don't know poop about any type of design and this guy gives them a marketing tool that works. Farmers in our area can make as much (or more) on the corn maze than the corn itself.

the maize mazes have saved a lot of smaller farms in Prince Edward County and surrounding areas here. Terrific way to keep the family farm alive and to get city families out into the country.

1 Reply

@George,

George wrote:

Odd . . . no maize puns yet.

yeah, pretty amaizeing.

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@George,

Good thing, too . . . i'd have viewed that with dismaize . . .

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A mermaze:

http://www.treinenfarm.com/domain/502/upload/images/full_71766.jpg

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@Linkat,

There is something primal about mazes, though... They used to be places of execution, with your fate decided by fate, and your own feet... One way out, and many ways to death; and since you found your way there on your own, you could never blame another...

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@Linkat,

Linkat wrote:

And why wouldn't you just follow the noise of the cars on road - you can simply push through the corn stalks (it ain't brick walls ya know).

Thank you Linkat for the obvious answer. If you didn't post it, I would have.

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@Fido,

Quote:

So they had a lot of baggage, stroller, purses, backpacks, diaper bag; and otherwise, not being able to get through a wall of corn with out damage to it is another way of saying F A T...

It's not like they couldn't leave some of the biggest items behind until after they found their way out. Then someone with a better sense of direction could have gone in through the straight path the family made and take the large items via the long way around.

This way it wouldn't have cost the town how many hundreds of dollars for the 911 response.

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@tsarstepan,

I love it that they show up with dogs and all.

Talk about an over reactions by the police also!

Send a patrol car out and get a hold of the farmer seem to be the first step.

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@tsarstepan,

tsarstepan wrote:

Quote:
So they had a lot of baggage, stroller, purses, backpacks, diaper bag; and otherwise, not being able to get through a wall of corn with out damage to it is another way of saying F A T...

It's not like they couldn't leave some of the biggest items behind until after they found their way out. Then someone with a better sense of direction could have gone in through the straight path the family made and take the large items via the long way around.

This way it wouldn't have cost the town how many hundreds of dollars for the 911 response.

The same money would have been spent regardless if all the participants had been sitting at the coffee shop... Expense is built in, and necessity is random... What might have helped is for the 911 op to remind those people of their options, and tell them not to panic, that they were in a corn maze with a limited number of paths out, and that every dead end brought them closer to home... Calling out the riot squad for a spit ball fight is low intelligence on the part of the authorities, so the problem may be something common to both, perhaps in the water supply...

1 Reply

@Fido,

It could be worse, you could be on skates. This link was emailed to me today. http://www.hrp.org.uk/HamptonCourtPalace/WhatsOn/IceRink?EventDate=26/11/2011&Step=View

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Oh you internet tough guys. It's easy as hell to just sit there on your asses and pretend you know what you would do in such an emergency. But you don't know what it's like till you find yourself 25 feet deep into a corn maze with no non-inconvenient way out.

We lost a lot of good men to corn mazes. A lot of good men....

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@Robert Gentel,

And babies.

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I thread my way through the cubicle labyrinth of the Widget Factory
every day. A corn maze holds no terror for me.

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@Robert Gentel,

What did people ever do in those dark days before everyone carried a phone with them everyplace they went?

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@Robert Gentel,

I.....

I hadn't realized.....

I'm sorry.

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@maxdancona,

They died in corn mazes. Of amazement. But only if the maize wasn't ripe, I guess.

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@maxdancona,

They yelled for help and the farmer's kids would come to get them.

Okay. How did this happen?
Who thought it would be fun to go to a corn maze with a three week old baby?
And a five year old.
(Hint: not the mother.)
Okay. So it was the idea of the five year old that the mother is MARRIED to who thought this up.
(I think we are right so far.)
Who wanted to wait until the kid's naps were over which made them get to the maze a little late in the day??
(Hmm. I'm betting neither of them knew how big a corn maze is.)

(and when the sign says "About an hour to find your way through." that means "about an hour for people not lugging five year olds and baby stuff and babies, but more like those five cute fourteen year old kids who will keep passing you about twenty times because they NEVER want to go home.)

So, after about two plus hours of trudging around the dusty, semi-stinky, mosquito and fly infested pathways one of the parents reached their limit.
(Hint: not the idiot who was abSOlutely sure that if they just took a left at that last crisscross----- )

Did the article say which one of them called?

Joe(Honey! What are you doing? HONey!)Nation

The Horror! Lost in a Corn Maze! What would you do?

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