The Kvetch Thread

Got an e-mail from FreshDirect confirming that the cost of the order plus the overdrafts will be returned to me.

What can I say? Some of us like assertive women.

Aw, shucks.

So now I get a message that the full amount of the order will be credited to my debit card. No mention of the bank overdrafts.

Another e-mail from me. Please send me a definitive final answer.

I suspect that by the time I get a final answer, the money will be in my account and I will have eaten all the food I ordered.

Save those emails. They could turn out to be significant.

Oh, good!

Roger, why do you suppose I've been responding to everything. I could easily have just waited to see what happened. You ain't talking to a joik.

right. i knew that

You'll get em.

I got 'em. The money is in my bank account.

Heh heh heh.

Did you get 'em for pain and suffering?

That would involve a lawyer. Maybe I could get them to pay me to keep my mouth shut. A bit late for that, though, isn't it?

Maybe a little bit of schmaltz to keep you sweet?

I'm sleeping on a 36 year old mattress. I think this may be one of the reasons why I'm having trouble sleeping. Can't get comfortable. I sigh.

So I'm sitting and playing a game on my computer, and it occurs to me that maybe I should turn the mattress over. Sounds like a good idea. I can't remember when I did it last. I turn it around, but not over.

I get clean linens ready. A nice new bed.

I make a game plan. Get the mattress on the floor and then tip it over the other way coming back. I make room on the floor. I slide the mattress onto the floor.

I can't get the steenkin' thing back onto the bed. It's heavy. I mean HEAVY. I survey the situation. I try again. I fall down--onto the mattress. I do some more surveying. I have a plan.

I rest and catch my breath. I move the bed so that it's up against the wall. I move a cabinet so that it prevents the other end of the bed from moving. I will do this by corners.

I lift the edge of the mattress up. It springs back and knocks me down--this time on the floor. Not hurt. I catch my breath and contemplate calling the doorman and asking him to send up a porter.

Gonna give it one more try. I make progress. I stop to rest. (Breathing like I'm climbing a mountain.) I get more of the mattress on the bed than on the floor. But one corner is stuck under the bed. I lift the mattress and the bed. Done. The mattress is on the bed. There are wires sticking out of it. I manage to cut one off that's sticking out of the middle. I tried cutting the ones off on the edges. Couldn't do it. I said a few dirty words and tucked them under.

Put on the clean linens.

What am I kvetching about? STEROIDS. I'm taking them for asthma. If I wasn't on steroids, I wouldn't have dreamed of such an undertaking. Hell, I might not have changed the linens.

Dem steroids give you unnatural energy. In my case, not the strength to go with it.

I gotta wind down. Them I'm gonna take a nap on this side of the mattress.

Phooey.

WIRES sticking out?


Eeeeeeeeeeek!

I say eeeeek only when I see a mouse.

For wires I have a stronger vocabulary. Not to worry. The wire where I would be on the mattress is gone. The others are tucked under.

The steenkin' mattress is old. Stuff is gonna stick out.

My cable is out. The first available appointment for a repairman is Friday. This means that I have to go almost a whole week without tv. I'm dependent on it.

This stinks.

Until then I'll send out unpleasant thoughts to the buffoons at the cable company for you Roberta.

So I'm sitting at my computer and sulking. I hear a voice behind me. My tv turned itself on and is working.

I'm keeping the appointment on Friday. Too many problems lately. Let the guy come and gimme a new cable box.

Thanks, tsar. Unpleasant thoughts are always appreciated.

Good thinking. The TV would otherwise stop working as soon as you cancelled the appointment.