The Kvetch Thread

The first time, I had symptoms. I was bleeding--a lot. In fact, I was hemorhaging. I had cancer in my uterus. I was admitted to the hospital and given two transfusions before they could operate.

The second time, it was my throat. During a throat exam, they thought they saw a wart on my larynx. I was scheduled for minor surgery. They wheeled me into the OR, took a look, and wheeled me back out. Not a wart. Throat cancer.

In both cases, nothing hurt.

So, Gracie. Sometimes there are symptoms, and sometimes there aren't. This is one reason why people should get regular check-ups. The earlier you catch it, the better it is.

I'd like to put my 2 cents in. In 1986, I found a non-painful lump on my thigh. I showed it to the doctor, who said it was "nothing". Six months later, when I was in the hospital for some minor surgery, I showed the lump (which had not changed) to the surgeon.

He sent a general surgeon in, who ordered that a biopsy be taken. Guess what? I had lymphoma.

Throughout my disease, I had no other symptoms, except that I eventually adeveloped more lumps.

The moral of the story is: don't fool around with lumps.

Cancer in your uterus? I didn't even know you could get cancer there.
So, you had 2 diff types of cancer. Gosh. Did you have them both at the same time or did you like have the one in your uterus then got better and got cancer again in your throat?

Did you catch your cancer earlier? How long did you have cancer before you found out you had it?
Cancer doesn't hurt? Is it just radiation that hurts?

You know how smoking causes lung cancer, how'd you get your cancers? Were the doctors like 'Oh you have cancer and you probably got it from blah blah blah ...or were they just like "you've got cancer" and that was it?

Hi Phoneix32890

You had cancer too? How long did it take for you to get better? Did the doctors have to do surgery to get the lumps out or did you do radiation like Roberta? How many lumps did you have? I hope no one in my family ever gets cancer. My grandma had cancer a long time ago but it was like wayy before i was even born and her cancer wasnt bad i think.
Were you scared or did you know everything was gonna be ok?

If you're interested, I've had cancer, too. So has my husband. (Both about 17 or 18 years ago, so don't worry.) Neither of us had any pain whatsoever from the cancer. The treatment, however...

My husband had a lump under his jawline that they thought was due to an enlarged lymph node from a respiratory infection. Two rounds of antibiotics, and it didn't go away. So they decided it must be a cyst (they're common in that area) and tried to remove it. Uh oh, it wasn't a cyst. Turned out to be stage 3 tonsillar cancer that had spread to the nearest lymph node. (Yes, cancer can start in a tonsil. Cancer can start damn near anywhere.) They gave him a 50-50 chance of surviving 3 years. A very risky and disfiguring surgery followed, as did intensive radiation treatment that was very difficult. All this happened when I was pregnant with our only child and during the baby's first few months. Hubby is still here and doing fine, although he will be on pain meds for the rest of his life as a result of the surgery. The cost of being alive.

A year later, I had an enlarged thyroid (called a "goiter") which is not that uncommon, especially in the first year after a pregnancy. The enlargement was benign, as they usually are. But unexpectedly, lab results after the surgery showed cancer beginning. So I had a second surgery to remove the remaining thyroid and follow-up "nuclear medicine" that was a breeze. I just swallowed a radioactive iodine pellet and stayed in isolation for a few days, reading a good book. Didn't even have to change out of street clothes. A follow-up scan showed not a single thyroid cell left in my body, and since the form of cancer I had only originates in thyroid cells, it was a 100% cure. However, I will have to take replacement thyroid hormone every day for the rest of my life and have blood tests to monitor it every 3 months. That's pretty easy, though.

Oh, another example. My husband's aunt has lung cancer right now, and was just given 6 weeks to 6 months to live. It was suspected by symptoms and confirmed by x-rays and other tests. She has had no pain so far, and they say she may not have any. I hope they're right.

Why do you ask? Do you know someone who has cancer now?

Gracie, You can get cancer almost anywhere. The first was the cancer in my uterus. I had surgery--a hysterectomy. Then I had radiation.

Several years later they found the cancer in my throat. The two cancers were unrelated. They couldn't operate, so I had radiation.

Radiation itself doesn't hurt, but the side effects can be awful and long-lasting.

Most of the time there's no way of knowing what causes cancer. It just shows up.

The throat cancer was caught early. The cancer in my uterus was well along. I was exhibiting symptoms.

There's no way to be sure that you will be OK. You can hope that the treatment works. I went for checkups regularly for five years for the cancer in my uterus. I was declared cured after five years. I'm still going for regular checkups on my throat.

Is this on your mind, Gracie? Are you worried about something or simply curious?

The cancer probably started in early 1986. It was not diagnosed until the end of the year. In early 1987, I had the lump removed, and subsequent radiation.

At the time I was told that this particular cancer was "incurable", and that I would succumb to it in about 4-6 years. The preferred "treatment" at the time was, "watch and wait", which I did for over 2 years.

I developed a few more lumps.I had one at the side of my elbow that was the size of a half of a golf ball. That one was excised, but not radiated. I was given a round of "moderate' chemotherapy, that was given in a series of five days on, and a couple of weeks off. It was strange. While I was on the chemo, the lump would recede, only to return during the"off" periods. In truth, the treatment was doing nothing.

At one point my oncologist said that he could do nothing more for me, but wanted me to see a specialist in lymphoma. The specialist wanted me to have my bone marrow "harvested", so that I might have it available in case I needed a bone marrow transplant.

At the beginning of 1990, the specialist sent me for the transplant. This involved
being in a hospital, in a sterile room. I received 5 days of intense chemotherapy.
This destroyed my blood. I was then given a transfusion of my own saved marrow, which had previously been cleaned of any cancer cells.

I was in the hospital for 69 days. The transplant was successful, and I was doing well, but a severe allergic reaction to one of the medications caused me to be there for a month longer than anticipated.

I returned home around memorial day, and went back to work (part time at first) right after labor day. I have been in remission since.

A note to you and the other cancer survivors: mazel tov! Keep on keeping on.

I have 2 friends going through this now. I can pass on to them some more encouraging news.

You've had cancer too Eva?! How old were you?
I'm glad that you and Roberta and Phoenix are better now. Cancers scary stuff. Did you freak out when you found out? Did you cry? I would've been soo scared.

Its soo weird that the treatment hurts and the cancer doesn't. Its like, your getting rid of one problem (cancer) but now you've got a ton of other problems to deal with from radiation. If I got cancer, I wouldn't wanna take that stuff. Has anyone ever got cancer and didn't take radiation and chemo and still lived?
He's still in pain from the radiation from all those years ago?!
Eva, did your pregnancy make you get cancer?

I'm really really sorry about your aunt. I hope the doctors are wrong and she gets better. Why do doctors do that anyway? That just seems soo wrong to me. I never wanna be a doctor. I couldn't tell someone their dying. How do the doctors know when people are gonna die anyway? Anything can happen. People can get stronger right?

Is your aunt still taking medicine even though the doctors said they won't make it?

There's this boy at my school and his mom had cancer for awhile and she died a few weeks ago. He dosent go to my school anymore. I guess he had to move away to live with another family member or something. Everyone at school was talking about it. I mean, he wasn't my friend. Id seen him around school before but I didn't know him. I still feel bad though. So, I started thinking about a lot of stuff and I wanted to talk to Roberta cause I thought she was the only person I knew who had cancer. I didn't know you and Phoneix had it too. And my dad didn't tell me my grandma had cancer until I told him Jason.

I'm really really glad that your okay Roberta. I mean, I know things aren't perfect for you and your having a hard time, but I'm glad your here and your okay. Your a good friend and I like talking to you.

I've been thinking about it because a kid at my schools mom died from cancer. And I just found out my grandma had cancer. I'm alittle worried, because sometimes I think like, what if my dad gets cancer or what if I grow up and get cancer, you know? Its scary to think about. But I'm not that worried I guess, I just sometimes overthink stuff. Im
mostly just curious.

people who worry all the time about getting cancer are more likely to get cancer.

the cure rates today are such that it is not as scary as it used to be. not that it's fun...

stuff happens that we can't control, gracie.

you just deal with it if it does...

They told you you were gonna die in 4-6 years? What'd you do after you heard that? I'm glad your okay now Phoenix and that your cancers gone and the doctors were wrong.

I know that people die from cancer, but what does it do to you? How can something that doesn't even hurt kill you?

Whoa! You were in the hospital for more than 2 months!
I know what a bone marrow transplant is, they hurt don't they. They use that huge needle right? That sucks.

Gracie, I'm glad I'm around too. Does it help to know that cancer is not a death sentence? The treatments are difficult, but still better than being dead.

You asked Eva how she reacted when she found out. She hasn't responded yet, but I'll tell you how I reacted. I said a dirty word--the f word. I wasn't so much frightened as I was resigned to deal with what I had to deal with. Very pragmatic.

I reacted the same way with the throat cancer. While I was being treated for throat cancer, I found out that I had a brain tumor. The f word did not suffice.

Cancers still scary to me. Just because the cure rates are higher now doesn't mean I'd survive cancer too if I got it. Plus, I've got type 1 and honestly, I haven't been doing all that great of a job taking care of myself lately. Wouldn't I be at risk for like pancreatic cancer or something? Its scary...

But I get what your saying. Its scary but I'm not, like, freaking out about it. Its just weird to think that all that stuff could happen to me one day or worse it could happen to my dad just like it did to that kids mom.
Everythings way more complicated than I thought. But yeah, I'm probably overthinking it. I do that a lot.

you could get run over by a bus tomorrow.*

but you need to take good care of your diabetes. you'll miss those extra years at the end of your life a lot more as the time gets closer.


* do they still have buses in California?

Yeah, I know its not a death sentence. I know if your strong you can beat it. Tons of people have already. That helps.
But, really, I'm not that worried right now. I've just been thinking about it and I wanted to talk about.

You weren't scared? Your really strong Roberta! I would've cried and cried and cried.

A brain tumor too? Isn't a tumor just like cancer? Did you have surgery or radiation?

Did cancer mess up your life? I mean, you're still having a hard time
and I know it must suck. Are you happy?

Not all tumors are cancerous. Some are just plain tumors.

One pet peeve of mine, not sure really where I developed it since I don't have a closer experience with cancer than most people (all four of my grandparents died of it, but at advanced ages), is the whole "if you're strong you can beat it" thing.

I do know plenty of strong people who haven't beaten it, and plenty of weak people who have. (And plenty of strong people who have beaten it, and weak people who haven't.)

The point is though that it's way too individual. And when I think of the strong people who haven't beaten it (and I do know plenty of them -- most recently my cousin's wife, not yet 30, with a young son, who fought valiantly, with grace and good humor), that phrase kinda sticks in my craw.

I know you didn't mean anything by it, especially in this context, just noting.

Haha! I guess so, not many where I live but I never ride them anyway. Only once when I was little and I wanted to run away from home. I told you that, remember? The odds of me getting hit by a bus or not the same as getting cancer Mr.Rockhead. Lol. But I get your point.

I know. Gotta start taking better care of my diabetes. Its just that when I'm with my friends I wanna be normal and eat/do whatever I want whenever I want just like they do. Its sucks that my stupid body never works right. I'm taking better care of myself though. No way am I getting DKA again.

Gosh, I'm really sorry sozobe! I didn't mean it like that at all. Sometimes I just say stuff without really thinking about it. I didn't mean to make it seem like I think anyone who didn't beat cancer is weak. I know that's not the way it works. It was a stupid thing to say and I'm sooo sorry.

No, I know you didn't mean it that way... I see it EVERYWHERE. Was just thinking about it this weekend.