@dege10,
It sounds like she was feeling guilty and got it off her chest, and now that you haven't left her, she can't understand how you haven't forgiven her yet either.
It also sounds like you are sending out mixed messages to her about what you are feeling....which may be because you have mixed feelings...but to the person receiving those messages, they are confusing, and probably frustrating.
Also, are you bottling your emotions inside until 'you can figure out what they are'? If so, don't do that - others will perceive that you are, and it does not feel genuine t them. In other words, if you are doing this, it is deceptive - and the other person will resent you for it (despite the fact it was triggered by a deception).
Don't allow her to belittle your feelings. There's nothing wrong with being passionate about your hurt. You have a right to be angry, and to express anger, and to have an outpouring of anger - these things are natural and right. But also remember to be angry in a way that doesn't demean the other person. Anger is more about you and your feelings than about her (even while it involves her)