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Thu 18 Nov, 2010 10:44 am
Is Marriage Becoming Obsolete?
AP - 11/18/2010
A new report suggests that more people are accepting the view that marriage isn’t necessary to have a family.
As families gather for Thanksgiving this year, nearly one in three American children is living with a parent who is divorced, separated or never-married.
A study by the Pew Research Center, in association with Time magazine, highlights rapidly changing notions of the American family. And the Census Bureau, too, is planning to incorporate broader definitions of family when measuring poverty, a shift caused partly by recent jumps in unmarried couples living together.
About 29 percent of children under 18 now live with a parent or parents who are unwed or no longer married, a fivefold increase from 1960, according to the Pew report being released Thursday. Broken down further, about 15 percent have parents who are divorced or separated and 14 percent who were never married. Within those two groups, a sizable chunk – 6 percent – have parents who are live-in couples who opted to raise kids together without getting married.
Indeed, about 39 percent of Americans said marriage was becoming obsolete. And that sentiment follows U.S. census data released in September that showed marriages hit an all-time low of 52 percent for adults 18 and over. In 1978, just 28 percent believed marriage was becoming obsolete.
When asked what constitutes a family, the vast majority of Americans agree that a married couple, with or without children, fits that description. But four of five surveyed pointed also to an unmarried, opposite-sex couple with children or a single parent. Three of 5 people said a same-sex couple with children was a family.
“Marriage is still very important in this country, but it doesn’t dominate family life like it used to,” said Andrew Cherlin, a professor of sociology and public policy at Johns Hopkins University. “Now there are several ways to have a successful family life, and more people accept them.”
The broadening views of family are expected to have an impact at Thanksgiving. About nine in 10 Americans say they will share a Thanksgiving meal next week with family, sitting at a table with 12 people on average. About one-fourth of respondents said there will be 20 or more family members.
“More Americans are living in these new families, so it seems safe to assume that there will be more of them around the Thanksgiving dinner table,” said Paul Taylor, executive vice president of the Pew Research Center.
The changing views of family are being driven largely by young adults 18-29, who are more likely than older generations to have an unmarried or divorced parent or have friends who do. Young adults also tend to have more liberal attitudes when it comes to spousal roles and living together before marriage, the survey found.
But economic factors, too, are playing a role. The Census Bureau recently reported that opposite-sex unmarried couples living together jumped 13 percent this year to 7.5 million. It was a sharp one-year increase that analysts largely attributed to people unwilling to make long-term marriage commitments in the face of persistent unemployment.
Beginning next year, the Census Bureau will publish new, supplemental poverty figures that move away from the traditional concept of family as a husband and wife with two children. It will broaden the definition to include unmarried couples, such as same-sex partners, as well as foster children who are not related by blood or adoption.
Officials say such a move will reduce the number of families and children who are considered poor based on the new supplemental measure, which will be used as a guide for federal and state agencies to set anti-poverty policies. That’s because two unmarried partners who live together with children and work are currently not counted by census as a single “family” with higher pooled incomes, but are officially defined as two separate units – one being a single parent and child, the other a single person – who aren’t sharing household resources.
“People are rethinking what family means,” Cherlin said. “Given the growth, I think we need to accept cohabitation relationships as a basis for some of the fringe benefits offered to families, such as health insurance.”
Still, the study indicates that marriage isn’t going to disappear anytime soon. Despite a growing view that marriage may not be necessary, 67 percent of Americans were upbeat about the future of marriage and family. That’s higher than their optimism for the nation’s educational system (50 percent), economy (46 percent) or its morals and ethics (41 percent).
And about half of all currently unmarried adults, 46 percent, say they want to get married. Among those unmarried who are living with a partner, the share rises to 64 percent.
Other findings:
– About 34 percent of Americans called the growing variety of family living arrangements good for society, while 32 percent said it didn’t make a difference and 29 percent said it was troubling.
– About 44 percent of people say they have lived with a partner without being married; for 30-to-49-year-olds, that share rose to 57 percent. In most cases, those couples said they considered cohabitation as a step toward marriage.
– About 62 percent say that the best marriage is one where the husband and wife both work and both take care of the household and children. That’s up from 48 percent who held that view in 1977.
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
Is this a good or bad trend? For children? For adults? For society?
BBB
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
Quote:Is this a good or bad trend? For children? For adults? For society?
Interesting that response was split pretty evenly on this question. I am firmly in the negative camp, the impermanence and lack of commitment that now pervades the family unit tends to make the individuals within it more fragile and unstable. It is a chicken and egg problem though, because generally as goes the family so does the individual, and vis versa. At root the breakdown of the family and the individual are both the same spiritual problem. It does not get solved until we move on the the next civilization.
@hawkeye10,
"It does not get solved until we move on the the next civilization. "
What new civilization do you have in mind?
BBB
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
Quote:What new civilization do you have in mind?
IDK, but the one we have is on its last legs. I expect terrorist or terrorist state launched nuclear attack to finish it off with-in my lifetime. What comes next we will have to decide. we will become a planetary confederation with a planetary police force almost certainly. Eastern and Western views on the autonomy of the individual will need to be combined in some way that works. The next great religion will have to be birthed. The economy will certainly be changed a great deal, as greed no longer suits our needs, and consumption needs to be rolled back a great deal.
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
I don't know anyone who thinks marriage is obsolete. It might be the part of the country I live in, but everyone I know would thing this is a laughable statement. That doesn't mean they aren't supportive of families where "American children are living with a parent who is divorced, separated or never-married", but long term couples who never marry are very rare and homosexual couples are seeking the right to marry, not blowing it off as inconsequencial. I agree with the idea that Americans are accepting of families made up of all different compositions, but that is different than saying marriage is obsolete.
@engineer,
Should I have been surprised at this research result? I've been trying to place the generations that might cause it.
BBB
@engineer,
Quote:agree with the idea that Americans are accepting of families made up of all different compositions
that, and that family units are temporary. It used to be something that grounded us, now we increasingly dont have faith that our family of today will be our family of tomorrow, as families reconfigure as the adults break the family in order to move on to new relationships.
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
Quote:I've been trying to place the generations that might cause it.
that would be just about everyone these days, the family went into step decline of relevance when divorce become easy. It started when getting married become easy. Both were a mistake. It is the kids of divorce and of repeat family reconfigurations who don't believe in marriage and the family, primarily.
@BumbleBeeBoogie,
I really wonder at the methodology for the poll. I work with a number of young professionals around here, some of whom are or were in live in relationships. They might answer that marriage is obsolete if asked, but then they go off and get married. I've known couples together for several years, but when they start thinking about having children, once again, wedding bells. I wonder if people respond this way because of misconceptions about what is happening in the world rather than their personal situation or beliefs. Yes, the divorce rate is high and you hear about that a lot, but that is because people are still getting married to start with.
@hawkeye10,
hawkeye10 wrote:
It is the kids of divorce and of repeat family reconfigurations who don't believe in marriage and the family, primarily.
I would guess it is the other way around. My (limited) experience is that these children are the ones who crave the stability of marriage when they become adults. You hear comments like "I don't want my children to go through what I did."
@engineer,
Quote:"I don't want my children to go through what I did."
Which is solved by not having kids, or not ever letting kids believe that the family is intended to be permanent. When kids of divorce become gun shy about marriage but still have kids we have a bad situation, where kids are brought into a relationship where the adults can not commit to each other. Kids can not help but to be effected, for they can not be committed to a family unit that the adults will not commit to.
@hawkeye10,
Or they solve it by waiting until they are in a solid, committed relationship to have children. That is my experience, limited though it is.
@engineer,
Or they have that intent at least, whether it works out or not is another story
Quote:For most women Hewlett interviewed, childlessness was more like what one called a "creeping nonchoice." Time passes, work is relentless. The travel, the hours-relationships are hard to sustain. By the time a woman is married and settled enough in her care er to think of starting a family, it is all too often too late. "They go to a doctor, take a blood test and are told the game is over before it even begins," says A.I.A.'s Madsen. "They are shocked, devastated and angry." Women generally know their fertil ity declines with age; they just don't realize how much and how fast. According to the Centers for Disease Control, once a woman celebrates her 42nd birthday, the chances of her having a baby using her own eggs, even with advanced medical help, are less t han 10%. At age 40, half of her eggs are chromosomally abnormal; by 42, that figure is 90%. "I go through Kleenex in my office like it's going out of style," says reproductive endocrinologist Michael Slowey in Englewood, N.J.
http://www.time.com/time/covers/1101020415/story.html
@hawkeye10,
Quote:It started when getting married become easy.
bullshit, getting married has always been easy.
up to the early 20th century in the USA a legal marriage could easily consist of nothing more than a note in the family bible stating "Billy Bob and Sara Sue Haskins got hitched yesterday, all the neighbors came around and Charlie Smithe played his banjo in the barn while the men folk got drunk." Same process occurred with births, both recognized by the census and the courts and later, by the Social Security Administration and general legal functions. Civil procedures such as marriage licenses are a very modern invention in the USA.
@dyslexia,
Kidding, in that I'm not used to courts siding with spouses, being as I am from a no fault state.
@dyslexia,
Quote:up to the early 20th century in the USA a legal marriage could easily consist of nothing more than a note in the family bible stating "Billy Bob and Sara Sue Haskins got hitched yesterday
"up to" is deceiving, because through most of history one need to jump through hoops that the priests and church set in place in order to obtain a marriage.