How well do you remember Nursery rhymes?

There was a young man from Nantucket,
Had a .... WAIT a minute, that's not a nursery rhyme!

This thread is great!

k...now, if anyone remembers her nursery rhymes Id think itd be you

Though, you're right, the thread is great so far...dont let us in on the correct version, itll crush us, Im sure.

That's right, I mostly only know the correct versions.

Another "blue" version of "Mary had a little lamb".

Mary had a little sheep.
She took the sheep to bed.
The sheep turned out to be a ram
Mary had a little lamb.

Georgy, Porgy Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girsl and made them cry
When the boys came out to play
Georgy, Porgy kissed them too.

Jack and Jill,
Went up the hill,
To fetch a pail of water.
Goodness knows,
What they did,
They came with a
baby daughter !!

(sung to the tune of Mary had a little lamb)

Mary had a little cycle,
She rode it up the grass,
And everytime she hit a bump,
A spoke went up her arse !!

(sung to the tune of twinkle twinkle little star)

Nipple nipple,
Don't be far,
Can I press u in my car,
Up above the waist so high,
Always milky, never dry,
Let me press you, don't be shy
In the brassiere you will die !!

(u guys asked for it )

We DID?

Have no idea how I found this thread, but seeing as it's here:

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead
Now Mary takes her lamb to school
Between two slices of bread.

mary had a little lamb
its fleece was black as charcoal
and every time it jumped the fence
sparks came out its rsole

little miss muffett sat on her tuffet
eating her curds and whey
along came a spider
who sat down beside her
and she said
wrack off hairy legs

the wind is strong and wild today
look everything is blown away,
the white geese honk, the clouds roll bye
soon all the washing will be dry,
down the street the wind blows fast
if your quick you'll see some ass.

I shall return!

mary had a little lamb
the doctor was surprised
but when old macdonald had a farm,
he couldnt believe his eyes

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Had scrambled eggs for breakfast again.

The boy stood on the burning deck,
His feet were full of blisters.
He tore his pants on a rusty nail,
So now he wears his sister's!

Hickory Dickory Dock
Two mice ran up the clock
The clock struck one
And the other escaped with minor injuries

(Remembered by my son)

The Grand Old Duke of York
He had 10,000 men
His case comes up next week.

Mary had a little lamb.
She tied him to a heater,
And every time he turned around
He burned his little seater!

Mary had a little lamb,
Some mint jelly,
Some new potatoes . . .

Little Miss Muffett
Sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
And sat down beside her
And said:

"What the hell is a tuffet?"

Little Jack Horner
Sat in a corner
Eating his sister . . .

(This isn't a family show, is it?)