Do people talk to you?

I believe, people only open up to me to tell me good things about their lives. Not bragging to me, but just letting me know they have a life, I think. The less than positive things they usually hide, I believe, until they are sure I am not judgemental.

It is all silly, since I am so not interested in most people's lives. But naturally, one cannot tell someone, "That's right; just bore me."

You're a joy Foofie

I guess I am the opposite of you. I tend not to get people bragging, I get people that tell me "bad" things; hard things in their lives. Maybe somehow, people can sense about which people care and which that do not.

Most likely why you get different types of conversations.

Yes, people talk to me.
Travelling in Sweden it happens seldom. It is complicated to explain why as it used to be a question of politeness. Until around 1970 it was very difficult to approach a Swede as we did not have a polite form of "you" The German Sie. Now we use the less polite form of you. The German word du. So it makes it easier to approach a person, but as a rule Swedes are polite and keep a certain distance to you.
Then I lived in Copenhagen and communted every day and more often than not I got involved in a conversation. The same happens when I travel on the continent. In USA I found that people also like to talk to you.I lived in NYC and found people very extroverted.
In GB people are more introverted. The same in Switzerland, where I lived in Zürich.

It must be the auras we exude because it happens to me on the phone as well. (Could be our dulcet tonality.)
It is definitely because we look non-threatening but I'd also like to think it has to do with how we look like we might know something.

How that image is created I haven't a clue. People do tell me their life stories, but mostly I am needed for information.

I am stopped at least once a week by someone needing directions, most of them speak only a little English. Using hand signals and the smattering of French, Spanish, German, Russian I have, we work it out. (I've also just gotten off trains at 125th Street and escorted lost souls 'up and over' in order for them to catch the downtown 'C' train.)

At running events, I've been asked (in the middle of 5000 runners and 500 volunteers) for help finding the t-shirt tent or the baggage.

Last Saturday, at the movies, on my way to get a popcorn and soda, a man asked me "Which way are the restrooms, please." (I have to get rid of that shirt. It always makes me look like someone in charge.)

Maybe it's not the shirt.
This morning, I am standing naked to the waist, wringing out my t-shirt after doing a mile on the track at the Park at 135th Street. Literally, I am squeezing a quart of horsesweat out of the poor red cloth, when a guy with a briefcase, wearing a nice suit jacket and slacks in this heat, asks me if a nearby building is the "Heritage Center". I told I didn't know, but that I did see an information desk inside for the Riverside Summer Park and maybe they would know. Please note that there were about fifty other people around the area, some kids, but mostly adults.

I like it when people ask me stuff.
Joe(If I know the answer, it makes me feel good all day.)Nation

not ofen

Funny I am from New England. We are considered to be very reserved and "polite and distant" as you describe a Swede. I wonder if it is just that in comparsion to other parts of the US rather than other countries.

Well - sounds like me. I get asked all the time for directions. Even in London I was asked by a couple of British women how to get to Buckingham Palace. Imagine their surprise (I could see it on their faces) when with my Boston accent, I gave them directions.

Question for you, Joe - are you a big conversationalist with people who are "friends" or that you know? Like at a gathering, do you talk alot with others? I am the opposite in these sorts of situations. Not the one necessarily to seek out with small talk or with social sort of talking.

This sounds like a New England thing. Have you ever had this happen to you in New York City?

lordy lord do people talk to me.

and I talk to them.

I can't imagine what it would be like to go all day without flaring up a conversation with a complete stranger.

Isn't that how people meet?

I'm an introvert too linkat, and I would have a hard time talking to someone at a party.

But, talking to someone while standing in line, while looking at the same items in the herb aisle, just randomly living life, I'm ready to converse.

Frankly, I can't believe how many people walk around with their faces jammed into their iphones, talking and texting. In their own little self contained environments.

The whole world is around you! Look around!

I don't go to NYC much so I can't compare - but it happened in London and it happens over the phone which (and I've asked where the customer service person is located) is rarely in New England.

Ha - another one like me!

So now I can let my husband know I am not strange. He finds it really odd that complete strangers talk with me this way. I remember getting off the phone with a customer rep once (now the poor guy was trying to pull stuff and run things on the computer to help me) so I chatted with him while he was doing this. After I got off I told my husband all about this guy's life. He just looked at me and shook his head and said why do you get in these conversations? I am glad some one else understands.

This one time, I took my car into a body shop to have a small dent pulled out.

When I came back to pick the car up, I started chatting with the owner, who happened to me a very attractive woman. She didn't look like the type of woman who owned a body shop.

I learned that this had been her husbands business, but she had to take it over because he died. They had saved and saved, and bought a beautiful home on the lake, which he had been renovating a bit at a time. One of the last things that had to get done was something on the outside of the house, near the lake. He was was holding some electrical tool, slipped, fell into the water, and electrocuted himself.

By the time she got to that part of the story, we were both crying and holding on to each other.

As I said, I have lived in NYC and in Boston and travelled in New England and spent a lot time in Wisconsin. There certainly is a difference and I would say you are more polite and distant than people in Wisconsin. In the deep South I found people very polite too.
It must be the British inheretance which comes through in New England.
I have not spent any amount of time amongst Swedish decendant in Minnesota so I cannot say how much they are influenced by Swedes there, but I am sure some trades still come through.

Wow - you beat me! I don't know if some one had cried with me.

Linkat: I have to tell myself to shut up or I find myself trying to entertain. As soon as I can I take a deep breath and ask everyone a question about themselves.
Joe(I then am entertained the rest of the night.)Nation

PS: There are a number of people on this forum for whom I have failed in person to do that - shut up and listen- and for that I apologize.
ok
Joe(Now it's your turn)Nation

I wonder what would happen if we met as strangers? Probably nothing as it seems we tend to "listen" to the other person. Most likely just stare at each other. Either that or the opposite and then we would both be crying or laughing depending on the story.

I grew up in Chicago and I did spend some time in Wisconsin. This State was founded primarily by German immigrant farmers. Good and frugal people, kindly and God-fearing. They are polite and far warmer than New Englanders, who I feel are the coldest of the cold, when it comes to sincere relationships. Yes, New Englanders are polite to your face, but turn your back and feel the "knife".

The warmest folks I've encountered were in Maryland. If it weren't for the heat, I'd move there. Real nice southern folks and by the way, great cooks.