CAN WE TALK?

Did you have a good birthday Clary? Did you get lots of presents? huh? did ya? huh? huh?

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Haven't I been given more books to read than I normally get through in a year? Isn't my house full of flowers? Haven't I got a new supply of anti-wrinkle cream?!!!! Am I a lucky woman or what?

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Wow, that's fantastic, isn't i?? Have you read any of the books yet? I think that everyone is glad for you, aren't they? Have you managed to get back to work after all the excitement and decisions?

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Was I not working until I got interrupted by my Oxonian son checking out an MA in Commonwealth Studies for next year? Did I spend an inordinate amount of time googling for the last Where am I? pic? Aren't I just waiting to get my teeth into vol. 1 of His Dark Materials, which is one of the nation's favourite books?

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Clary's son was made from Oxo boullion cubes?

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What else?

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'Commonwealth studies?' Doesn't that sound interesting? I wonder, what would that entail? Ah, I read about 'His Dark Materials' being in the top three, on 'The Big Read', was it not? I think that 'Lord of the Rings' got number one not because of the book, but because of the films, don't you? I prefer books to films: it leaves more to the imagination, doesn't it? Didn't a friend recommend I read 'His Dark Materials?' She did, didn't she? I have a lot to read over the long break though, don't I? I think that that- His Dark Materials- is a freaky name for a trilogy, don't you? Wasn't it getting to number 1 surprising? I wouldn't have chosen those three as the best books ever written, would you? I finished Italo Calvino's weird but wonderful 'if on a winter's night a traveller' last night: have you ever read it? It's a classic, but I should be writing my own novels instead of dallying on reading those of others, shouldn't I?

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Would you recommend Italo Calvino? It was surprising about His Dark Materials, wasn't it? And were you disappointed as I was that Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass were not in the top 21? But do you like HHGTTG which was also in the top 5?
Have you decided where to go spontaneously and randomly yet?

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Would I recommend Calvino? It's a very strange but enjoyable story, isn't it? Did you know that it's about you, the reader yourself, looking for the ending to the book that you're reading, namely Calvino's 'if on a winter's night a traveller'; that's rather eccentric, isn't it? I'll have to consult my brain, won't I?
==================================================================
Me: Brain, should I recommend 'Italo Calvino?'
Brain: You really enjoyed the book at every turn; you should recommend it, shouldn't you?
Me: Yes, I should, shouldn't I? That would be the best thing to do, wouldn't it?
==================================================================

Didn't it surprise you that they weren't in the top 21? I don't think that it was the greatest top 21, do you? I mean, at the top you have LOTR film-orientated; Pride and Prejudice nice but overly cosy; His Dark materials- apparently good...; I might read it; we should, shouldn't we? Hitchhiker's guide is a classic, isn't it? That deserved to be in the top 5, didn't it? A true British classic; the sense of humour and place is great, isn't it? I usually don't like anything to do with space, do you? It disappointed me to see that Little Women, Birdsong, and Rebecca got in front of War and Peace, did it you? That's probably because not many people got to the end of War and Peace, did they? It's a shame, isn't it? Tolstoy should have took out about three hundred pages, do you agree? Still, out of that 21, which would you put up on the top?

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Difficult to make a decision, isn't it? If I don't get on with Tolstoy, it doesn't really mean he shouldn't be in the top few, does it? Perhaps I can leave it to my husband to be the Russian novel specialist? He would have voted for Anna Karenina, wouldn't he? Did I mention Alice? Have I read it many times, or what? Things like 1984 are important aren't they, but would one say they were one's favourite? Isn't the Bible quite a good fictional work too? And the Odyssey?

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Did I forget to respond to the holiday plans question? Oh, I make too many an oversight, don't I? I am probably going to go to Berlin, stay with a friend, and go on the train to Vienna and to random little mountain villages; I think that this would be nice at this time of the year, wouldn't you? It should punctuate the boredom of going home for Christmas, shouldn't it? What is home, anyhow?

It is, you are right, aren't you? No, I don't like Tolstoy the best, but I value him more than Faulks, don't you? I like Anna Karenina; don't you find that that's better than W&P? It surprised me to see that there were no French classics in the top 21, did it you? I would have expected Madame Bovary or Les Misérables to have cropped their heads; to wish that Les Liaisons Dangereuses would appear would be overly optimistic and quixotic, wouldn't it?

Alice is a nice book; have you read it as many times as me? I must have read it near forty times, what about you? It's a nice book, not the most substantial, but still nice, isn't it? I don't know anyone who could say that 1984 is their absolute favourite, could you? That would be rather cold, wouldn't it? It's good, but I wouldn't call it a favourite: would you? Am I alone in thinking that Homage to Catalonia is a more pleasing Orwellian read? Perhaps I am biased in the Catalan part of my ancestry? Yes, aren't you so right in saying that of the Bible and the Odyssey? Did either actually get into the top 100? I don't suspect so, do you? After it all, one can easily conclude that it is easier to choose the worst book that one's read than the best, would you agree?

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After it all, one can easily conclude that it is easier to choose the worst book that one's read than the best, would you agree?

Isn't it difficult to choose that too? Aren't we stumbling over one another to produce examples of bad movies? - would we be able to distinguish the worst from that whole crop of bad?

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You are right, mustn't I concede? It is hard to choose the extreme best from a crop of good, and hard to choose the extreme worst from a crop of bad, isn't it? This is exacberated by the fact that we are faced with the biggest category, the mediocre, aren't we? Nonetheless, wouldn't it be easier for wise book readers to choose the worst book that they have read, from perhaps only a few dire reads, than the best from many brilliant ones? Films are another matter; there are so many bad films, more bad films than good, so it is easier to judge one's best film, would you not agree? One must concede that any decision- that implies finality- is hard when we read every day; it is too hard to name a favourite, as our lives are like rivers and seas, ebbing and flowing, having the beating rain fill us with new water, and having the greedy oceans take our surplus; as humans, we absorb; it is too hard to choose a clear favourite song, or book, as we might choose different books for different moods: people are changing things; would you agree with this trumped-up prelection?

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Sounds a trifle ott, doesn't it?

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OTT? I don't do OTT, do I? It's more 'crappy French actress' mode, isn't it??

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Is it? Perhaps you are a crappy French actress, is that possible?

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No: it can't be?? I am a /good/ European English actress, wouldn't you say?

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Until I see a production, it would be hard for me to have an opinion, yes?

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No; can't you tell from my fluidity in pretending to be hurt about LLD? Just look at my conviction, and surely, you could see?

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Can I see your conviction from here? Can you?

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