I may be cookie, but I'm not lending you my comb
If at first you don't succeed...skydiving is not for you.
You have hepatitis.
Man who go to bed with itchy bum, awake with smelly finger.
Your charred corpse will eventually be found by the police
Being named after something is sign of greatness-in your case, it is new disease
You will attempt to make origami from fortune, and fail.
Confucius say: "Person who look for knowledge of future on small piece of paper found in cookie is an idiot".
(I am cheating - I really DID get a fortune cookie which said that!)
Have you seen my dog?
Printed on recycled toilet paper.
It's 'Hey, Zeus!' stupid white man, not 'Jesus'
Are your hands clean?
If you can read this you are too close.
Add two calories per cookie.
Gullible roundeye
-> a friend once got a fortune cookie 'Only you can find Yma Sumac. Do it!'
-> I once got one that said 'Pass the bill to ther person on your left' just as my mother, on my left, took the bill awasy from me.
Feel free to stick this to the gum under the table.
We have cut down on costs. Please save this paper for use when you visit the bathroom.
My kid will be your kid's boss in five years.
My kid will downsize your kid in six years.
Can you guess which dish has dog meat?
We added deer penis to increase your sexual appetite.
Oh, don't
worry about him. His bark's worse than his bite.
Today is the first day of the rest of your miserable existence.
"In your next life, you will come back as a tree. That tree will be chopped down, and eventually be broken down and turned into paper; paper which will eventually become a fortune in a fortune cookie that you will read in another succesive life as a human; a fortune that will say exactly what this one says. Or has this already come to pass?"
Circle of life, baby...
In my prior existence I was a poet.
If when you walk into this restaurant, you can barely hear the sound of a "meow", run as fast as you can.
Fried rice causes zits.
No fortune cookie is that long kicky (I almost wrote kockie).
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.
Bet you never knew what ever happened to the hanging chads.
Conserve! Return your uneaten food to your waiter, so it can be recycled.
Over 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
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000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 grains served
Size: 6 7/8
Inspector 17
6-1276 SMOOCH
