dui

Sylvia - I've no idea what all those diagnosticians mean to accomplich by pressing their definitions on you, though I'm sure they mean well.

As I understand it you're looking for practical advice: tell your boyfriend in no uncertain terms that never, ever, under any circumstances whatsoever, are you getting into a car with him and letting him drive if you have the least suspicion that he as much as sipped one drop of alcohol. Not the legal limit, just ANY alcohol. AND stick with it - walk or take cabs, just don't get into any car he's trying to drive while drunk.

Sylvia listen to what you're being told here. Yes, you enable your bf when you ride with him when he has been drinking. And yes, it is almost a certainty that your bf has a serious problem with alcohol when he gets his 3rd DUI--I don't care what percentage he blew. It is only when he is forced to acknowledge consequences for his behavior that he is likely to be inspired to do something about his problem. Every time you excuse him or help him to avoid those consequences, the less likely he is to be able to see that he has a problem and get necessary help.

And finally, since you're getting the Dutch aunt lecture here, you are an extremely foolish girl to crawl into a car with somebody with a drinking problem. Find yourself a good Al-anon group and go to meetings every week. Sit there and listen for a good six months until the blinders fall off. Then you'll understand. It could save your life. Literally.

All this being said....fight the hell out of this DUI. Get a lawyer, do whatever you can to avoid this conviction.

Your BF has a right to his day in court and the state must prove that your BF was intoxicated beyond the limit. If they cannot prove that, you win.

The system isn't perfect, exploit that.

And listen to everyone else about how to avoid this in the future.

Any adult who can not obey a rule........ a rule that is in place to save lives, is a selfish, inconsiderate waste of space.

People KNOW, and it has been PROVEN that driving while intoxicated reduces and even REMOVES ones ability to operate a car.
A car that weighs two THOUSAND lbs.

A car that can KILL people.

If anyone thinks it is ok to drink to the point of oblivion, then drive and dont think they are endangering anyone else is a murderer in disguise and deserves any punishment they can possibly get.

I have absolutely no care, no emotion and no consideration for anyone who KNOWS what they are doing will endanger others and are arrogant and selfish enough to keep doing it.

That being said..
I have to wonder why you keep choosing to be with someone who is going to cost you and himself several thousands of dollars in legal fees, probation fees and court costs because he simply wont sit in the passenger seat after he has had some alcohol. I dont care if it was just ONE drink. Be responsible and sit in the passenger seat and allow someone else to drive. Even if you get into an accident that is not your fault, the slightest bit of alcohol on ones breath will get them a DUI if they are driving.
He sure does like taking advantage of you by putting you through all this legal bullshit by keeping his arrogance out of check by forcing you to ride with him after he has had something to drink. And for some reason he finds it ok to include you in his thousands of dollars in fines by continuing to add to it by drinking and driving YET again.

If he isnt an alcoholic, he is definitely an abuser of sorts to keep putting you in these situations. Have fun with that one.

When you get some self confidence and some maturity, you will leave him and find someone who wont do this to you.
It isnt up to you to find ways to work out HIS court issues . Especially charges he deserves and knows how to avoid.
Let him suffer. Stop helping him out of his punishments.

Unless you like this? you like paying? you like lawyers? you like being in court? you like the childish drama?

Me thinks you might.

Crap, and YOU know it, SheWolf, CRAP. I carry guns in New York, and I drive at way over 150mph, park in reserved spaces, and furthermore I know for a fact that lots of my fellow citizens do as well, not to mention that I also eat fatty foods and smoke cigarettes no matter what our billionaire mayor says. WHO decides what rule is to be followed, YOU? I'm with Sylvia, who posted here looking for some practical advice; if all you got for her is crappy self-righteous ex-alcoholic / junkie preaching, please drop it, it's a negative contribution AT BEST.

Go ahead.
Take the statement out of context if that suits you.
Im talking about drunk to oblivion driving. Or did you not read that far? There is a RULE against that. You think that rule is crap? Then Im not the one with the issue here.

But if what I say gets that far under your skin, it must apply.

Im not talking about petty bullshit like "parking in reserved spaces" jesus christ. You can compare THAT to people being killed by drunk drivers ? Please get your head out of your ass would ya? Talk about preaching.

Its quite simple.
IT is a fact that drinking and driving removes ones ability to operate a vehicle.
Avoiding that is simple. Dont drive. You said so yourself. Unless what you say is crap too huh?

OHHH wait.. what you say isnt "self righteous" thats right. So rules dont apply to you.
Eh . So be it. You either see the point or you dont. Big fat whop. Bend it and fold it how ever you want to meet your needs.
I dont give a rats ass.

LOL - fat, big, wop?? Not I, girl

General Information.
The Fourth Amendment secures an individual right to be free of UNREASONABLE seizures. A traffic stop is a seizure. So long as the officer had a reasonable suspicion based on articulable facts that the driver committed (or is committing) an offense, then the officer may initiate a traffic stop to investigate. For instance, if the officer saw a vehicle weaving in and about its lane and perhaps transgressing the center line, the officer may reasonably suspect that the driver may be impaired in violation of the law. He may stop the vehicle to investigate his suspicion. He may even ask the driver to take a field sobriety test in accordance with an implied consent statute--but the driver is not required to take the test. However, a refusal will have adverse legal consequences (e.g., loss of license for a period of time established by law). The suspicion might be dispelled through investigation, or it might ripen into probable cause to believe a crime has been committed which allows the officer to place the individual under arrest.

In some states, the law does not allow an officer to issue a seat belt citation unless the traffic stop was initiated for some other offense. However, if state law allows an officer to make a traffic stop for a seat belt violation, the officer's allegation that he personally observed a violation is sufficient. An individual may contest a seat belt citation in court and the burden is on the State to prove that the individual wasn't wearing a seat belt. With that said, a traffic stop MUST be confined to the facts and circumstances that prompted the stop in the first place. If a motorist is stopped for a seat belt violation, the officer must obtain the information necessary to fill out the citation, and then let the motorist continue. A traffic stop not a "license" for the officer to conduct an exploratory investigation concerning other matters. Thus, there is a question as to WHY a routine stop for a seatbelt violation (if such a stop is allowed under state law) progressed into a DUI investigation. Perhaps the officer smelled alcohol on the breath of the driver and observed bloodshot eyes?

You need a lawyer to analyze all the issues that are relevant to your particular case.

what does all that mean/

i do not get in the car with him if he is driven drunk inrmally am the driver while he is drinking.This just happen too be Labor day weekend an he was over at a buddys having repairs done too his vehicle.an reallydidnt have over the limit i dont believe but then i wasnt with him .an yes like i said in plenty of my msgs he does have the diease called gerd which i totally believe that caused him too have ahiger .level then it would have beem hadent he had that diease.an your commet bout getting my head out of my ass 1you can blow up your own ass jerk.

where the hell are all you people getting that iam enabling him too drink or even getting in the car with him while he is drinking? that has never happend an i have a license my self with a very clean recordone time in any of his drunk driving cases was i with him an further more i didnt even know him when he got his first an he had his second one two years before i knew him. An i have been with him foe 5 years, soo you all can stop with your B.S! that you dont even know what your talking about.GET IT STRAIGHT THEN MAKE UR DUMB ASS COMMETS AH!

whats all that mean?

Sylvia - if you're asking about Debra Law's post, click on her message to make clear that it's the one you want clarified. Mine was simple, to the point, and since you said you already do what I suggested that's the end of that.

If you're commenting on anybody else's post (other than mine or Debra's) keep in mind some folks think they're giving helpful advice when all they're in fact doing is making themselves ridiculous. Just ignore them. Far as your query on GERD, you got to ask both a medic and a lawyer, Debra here is a lawyer, but so far I know of no medics posting. Good luck.

you gotta know that drunk driving has in only twenty years moved from being a personally irresponsible action to being a morally reprehensible one. Twenty years before that it was normal behaviour. You can't come into a modern meeting place like a2k with your story and expect anything other than to be stoned by the mob. By the same token your husband can't expect any sympathetic ear when dealing with the courts.


that will not get you anything but called a idiot and a looser for being with such a man. It will be claimed that you must lack self worth, that you are bottom feeding, that you should be smart enough to know better.

I don't condone the mob, but I know what to expect from them. You should as well.

Driving under the Influence is the crime of driving a motor vehicle with blood levels of alcohol in excess of a legal limit ("Blood Alcohol Content", or "BAC"). Similar regulations cover driving or operating certain types of machinery while affected by drinking alcohol or taking other drugs, including, but not limited to prescription drugs. Driving while intoxicated (DWI) or driving under the influence (DUI) is a serious offense In addition to the danger you pose to yourself and others, you also expose yourself to severe penalties. These penalties include onerous fines, court costs, insurance surcharges, motor vehicle surcharges, loss of license and jail.