Are you anal retentive or a nit-picker?

I thought it meant popping a tent in the anal area. Jeeez!!! I don't know nothin!

I didn't even have a clue. So thanks to seaglass. :wink:

Yeah, same here. Thanks seaglass. Heck, I was way off.

anal retentive?
Anal Retentive (anal stage of development) -- The anal stage of motivational development is characterized by the child's central area of bodily concern in the rectum. Bowel movements become a source of pleasure to the child. The child may defecate to receive pleasure. However, gaining pleasure from defecating brings the child into conflict with the parents regarding toilet training. Freud claimed that delays during this stage (or this stage occuring prematurely) can cause fixation. Fixation during the anal stage can result in anal retention in which a person exhibits compulsive cleanliness, ordderliness, or fussiness.

Hey, I guess I wasn't that far off after all :-)

chew on this a little - obsessive-compulsive! Anal-retentive and nitpicker are not even in my universe

anyone admit they might be passive - aggressive?

Anal-retentive constipation of the personality

And, here I thought you were a excursusant

Husker - Passive-Aggressive Patterns
Husker: Passive-Aggressive Patterns

Interpersonal Behavior:

Tries to please and fails;
Aggression comes out in indirect ways;
Sometimes agrees to do things for others and then doesn't follow through;
Often feels pressure to perform, and has expectation and fear of failure, procrastination;
Also passive-aggressively defeats his own inner critic, so can't discipline self;
Sometimes acts out annoying behavior while not consciously knowing its impact on others.

Group, Organizational, Community, Work Behavior:
In case of people under the power of others, the passive-aggressive behavior can be planned consciously, e.g. employees stealing, being absent

Motivation:

Fails in a way that indirectly expresses anger and defeats others in order to preserve autonomy in the only way he feels he can, because aggression is not allowed

Core Issues:

Harm issues, punishment for aggression, shame;
Modeled after passive-aggressive parent;
Opposite reaction to violent parent;

Statement:

I can't do it.

Underlying Thought:

I will fail in order to preserve my autonomy.

Distortions of Perception:
Sees self as cooperative;
Sees people who are controlling as assertive;
Sees people who are judgmental as perceptive;

Dimensions Involved:
Power, value

Healthy Capacities Blocked:

Assertive, cooperative, self-valuing, responsible

Activating Conditions:

Situations where the person's performance will be judged (or he thinks so);
Authority figures, powerful people;

Demographics:
Common with teenagers;
Common in people who are under others' power;

Distinctions:

The victim pattern also involve failure and sometimes indirect anger, but the victim is trying to coerce others into caring for her, while the passive-aggressive is trying to indirectly achieve autonomy. The victim blames others while the passive-aggressive blames herself.

The defiant pattern also involves a reaction to perceived domination, but the rebellion is direct.

The compliant pattern also tries to please others, but there is little unconscious resentment or it doesn't get acted out.

The insecure pattern can feel pressured to perform and an expectation of failure, but there is no unconscious need to fail to defeat others and not a lot of unconscious anger at others.

Related Patterns:

The passive-aggressive pattern usually includes the insecure pattern.

Controlling is the opposite of passive-aggressive

Assertive is the healthy goal for a passive-aggressive person.

A passive-aggressive person may need to become defiant for a while in the process of growth.

Dynamics with Other Patterns and Capacities:

Passive-aggressive people are often attracted to controlling people in a destructive way, and vice versa.

Passive-aggressive people often gets into serious conflicts with controlling people.

A passive-aggressive person often makes others very frustrated while feeling bad about himself for doing this. He will often not give his partner what she wants.

I often make others very frustrated and feel very good about it!

I think they call that frustranal disorder Husker.

BumbleBeeB - are you a psychologist? Your information is really solid.

s'glass

Seaglass
Seaglass, no, I'm just a fairly good researcher.

BumbleBeeBoogie

:wink: