Venus in Venice: The Goddess of Love's Dinner Party

So, uh, a pakora, as you can see, is rather cute in a food-type sort of way, as cav noted. A little pinched thing of dough stuffed with whathaveyou and etc. Usually they're served with a bit of chutney. Er, sorry, Johnny, but it doesn't seem likely that you don't know what a pakora is.

So, uh, want a tour of the place? As littlek and Johnny head through the kitchen and out into the herb garden she can be heard saying: You know, whether you said the thing about the little puppy with the big teeth that got so much press lately, doesn't really........ {fade}

cav thinks littlek may be thinking of a samosa. Pakoras are generally vegetables bound in a batter and fried, not a dough. Maybe it's the wine...

Pakoras, samosas, champers and Pietro !! I think I have died and come to heaven..though I am avoiding fried food these days as I have put on a lot of weight during my trip to India.

But then having a bit of weight is not that bad is it. As they say - a chicken is not worth eating if there is no flesh on the bone And love handles serve a special purpose, something to hold on to when the ride gets a bit ...errr....umm....bumpy Tee Hee

Its hot in here, and all this silk which I am wearing is making me sweat. Will Pietro help me change my clothes ? Captain, can you pls arrange my custom made Louis Vuitton suitcase to be unloaded from my speed boat ? So I can change into my Armani Capris and Valentino shirt with dark Gucci sunglasses (so I can lech at all the men without other people knowing who I am staring at, I like to keep my target in suspense )

Cav, the best pakora is one which is "dipped" in batter made of gram flour (besan as we call it). Pakoras can be made of anything - my favorite ones being the stuffed green chillies one <where do you think my "hotness" comes from ? >

Lots of squealing coming from the direction in which lil'k and Johnny were seen walking, I wonder what is happening ????

Gautam...I reinvented the pakora just for you (this is the cocktail pakora)...I julienne the vegetables finely, squeeze out excess moisture, and a la minute, mix them in the spiced batter (as hot as people want it), and fry them in healthy canola oil, in teaspoon-sized portions. They end up looking like hairy balls, but I digress . I have used besan, which of course is on hand, and also a mixture of strained whole wheat flour and white flour. They are slightly left of authentic (for the size), but very popular with my clients.

cav, try these - I am sure they will be a hit with yr clients....


Stuffed Bread Pakora

Ingredients

4 slices of large bread, remove the crust.

For stuffing:-
1 medium potato boiled, peeled & mashed throughly.
1/2tsp. chilli pwd.
1/4tsp. black pepper pwd.
1tsp. chat masala
1 green chilli finely chopped
2tbsp. finely chopped fresh coriender leaves
Salt to taste

For batter:-
1/2cup besan
1/2tsp. thyme seeds
1tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. chilli pwd
Water 1/2 cup approximately
Oil for deep frying

Method:-


Mix besan, thyme seeds, salt, chilli pwd. & mix water small quantities at a time to make a smooth batter.Once it is smooth add water to make it little thin.Keep it aside.

Mix all the ingredients of stuffing. Put of this mixture on 1 slice, spread it throughly & press other slice on top of it. Repeat it with other two slices.

Heat the oil in deep pan. Dip the bread in batter & fry it turning twice. Take it out on paper towel to remove excess oil. With a sharpe knife cut it diagonally to make four pieces of each.

Serve hot with green corriander or mint chutney or tomato ketchup.

Oh man...that sounds good. I'll save that one for the non-Atkins diet folks!

Or if you wanna really set the party on fire.....

Chilli Pakora

Ingredients

10-12 Green Chillies
1 tbsp thyme seeds
1/2 cup Coconut grated
2 cup Besan
1/2 tbsp Cummin seeds
Tamarind 50 grams
Salt to taste
Oil

Method:


Soak tamarind with sufficient water and make tamarind pulp.
Slit green chillies lengthwise. Remove the seeds (don't remove the seeds if you want spicy). Boil them for 10-12 minutes.
Grind thyme and grated coconut. To that mixture add tamarind and salt to taste.
Fill in each of the green chilli with the mixture
In a bowl, add besan, cummin seeds and salt to taste.
Heat oil in a frying pan.
Add 2 tsp hot oil to the above mixture
Add required amount of water to mixture into a thick batter. Then add green chillies to this batter.
Drop green chillies one by one into hot oil. Deep fry on medium till the pieces turn golden brown in colour.

Tastes good when hot with Tomato Sauce.

Sounds like an improvement on the jalapeno popper, that's for sure. I plan on trying both.

{littlek and Johnny re-enter} Southern rance sounds lovely, maybe someday I will come visit you and your family, thanks for asking.

Hey all! On our way back through the kitchen we were startled by a pair of Bengal tigers {leveling eyes at Gautam}, do you have something to do with that? They seem hungry.

Um, what green chiles? Small jalapeno?

You guys know more about food than I'll ever know. It's like a foreign language to me. But it sure sounds good. I'll just sit here and be served, thank you. Ummmm yummy

(Eva saunters into the kitchen, dripping with champagne...but very, very happy...)

Oh, I doubt very much that Gautam has anything to do with the tigers. Hates kitties, he does. I believe those are supposed to be out back with the elephants...

(Eva opens one of the kitchen's swinging doors and waves at the animal trainer she hired for her failed grand entrance. The trainer, Lorenzo by name, leaves his newfound amour at the chocolate fountain and comes at once. He chuckles each of the tigers under the chin and leads them out the kitchen door. They follow obediently. Lorenzo has them well trained.)

Just beautiful, weren't they? I think I'll ask Lorenzo to have them perform for us when the pavilion out there is completed. Oh, Pietro! Have you finished it yet?? Where is he? Oh, no. Don't tell me he and Gautam have disappeared upstairs somewhere. (Sigh.) Will he ever get that pavilion finished?

(Clooney sticks his head into the kitchen and asks if Eva is coming back to the pool...)

Byyyyeeeeee!

Hmm, I'm enjoying this. One of my lovers used to look like George Clooney, but...frankly...better. Reminiscence is a wonderful thing...

And you let him get away, Osso?!

Long story! Vita e' breve... carpe diem, etc.

Oh, ne'er mind.

Giulietta gets dreamy eyed, twirls her thin crystal glass of fine grappa, con un po' di ghiacci.

Eva and George are resting quietly on embroidered silk pillows beside the champagne pool. All the food, fun & frolic have made everyone a little sleepy. Perhaps just a short nap, then more fun & games......zzzzzzzzzzzzz

I'm so glad you told me about the animals out back in the soon to be pavillion. I went to see them and met with the trainer, Cosomo, he's delightful. Don't let those whips fool you, they're all for show. The training comes from a stern love, not from cruelty. I was able to skritch the tigers under their chins and the elephant even nuzzled up to me. But, the chimp still hasn't warmed up to it.

Grappa? Any Lemoncello? How about a chilled and strained mixture of the two? Thanks. And how is every dreamy one of you?

mumblemumblemumblemumblemumblemumbleohyesrightthere
that'sthespotmumblemumblemumblemumblenodon'tstopmumble
mumblemumbleohyesthey'rerealmumblemumblemumbleIloveyou
tooyoubigteddybearmumblemumblemumbleoohthatticklesmumble
howdidyouknowI'mticklishrighttheremumblemumblemumble.....

(Eva has been known to talk in her sleep. She must be having a
lovely dream...)

oh my

lovely dream...............yes..........mumblemumblemumble ohyesthatitmumblemumble mumblemumbleuuuuummmmum mmmmumblemumblemumble mumblemumblemumblemumble
mumbleneedtoseethisperson mumblemumblemumble aboutafriendmumblemumblemumblezzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Ohhhh, so sorry. I'll never do it again.