Reply
Tue 11 Sep, 2007 08:19 am
What's at the Heart Of Peoples' Happiness?
By Jonathan Clements
From The Wall Street Journal Online
No, happiness isn't a lottery ticket away.
I am fascinated by academic studies of human happiness, because they bring scientific rigor to issues we all grapple with. We think more money will make us happier and yet studies suggest Americans are no more satisfied than they were three decades ago, when the standard of living was much lower.
So if winning the lottery won't do the trick, what will? Here are seven key lessons from happiness research. It is indeed possible to boost our happiness -- but it'll take more than a fat wallet.
1. What matters is what we focus on.
Those with higher incomes aren't necessarily happier. But when asked how satisfied they are with their lives, high earners are more likely to say they're happy.
Why? The question makes them ponder their position in society -- and they realize they're pretty lucky. The implication: If you have a hefty portfolio or hefty paycheck, you can probably bolster your happiness by regularly contemplating your good fortune.
Meanwhile, if you are less well off, avoid situations where you feel deprived -- and seek out those where comparisons are in your favor. Rather than buying the cheapest house in a wealthy neighborhood, settle for a town where people have similar salaries. When you think about your net worth, forget your well-heeled sister and focus on your cash-strapped brother.
2. Don't go it alone.
Studies have found that married folks are happier than those who are single.
"Marriage provides two sources of happiness," says Andrew Oswald, an economics professor at England's Warwick University. "One is sex and the other is friendship. Marriage has one of the largest impacts on human well-being."
Similarly, spending time with friends can boost happiness. Studies indicate that commuting is one of life's least enjoyable activities, that looking after the kids is more of a struggle than we like to admit and that eating is one of life's great pleasures.
But all of these things can be enhanced by adding friends. Commuting with others will make the trip less grim, playing with the kids will be more fun if there's another adult along and eating with others is better than eating alone.
3. We like to feel secure.
Midlife is a period of relative unhappiness. This dissatisfaction may stem from the lack of control felt by those in their 40s, as they juggle raising children and the demands of work.
By contrast, employees in senior positions, retirees and those with good job security often report being happy. One explanation: They have greater control over their daily lives.
"There's a profound link between insecurities of all kinds and human well-being," Prof. Oswald notes. "Supervisors are happier than those who are supervised. Job loss is an enormous negative and job security is an enormous plus to mental health."
4. We enjoy making progress.
Studies suggest we prefer leisure to work. But that doesn't mean work is always a source of unhappiness. We like the feeling of performing a job competently and being in the flow of work.
"There are definitely better and worse jobs," says David Schkade, a management professor at the University of California at San Diego. "If you're in the flow more often, that's going to be a better job."
But Prof. Schkade says work's real pleasure may come from the sense of accomplishment we feel afterward. "We know progress makes people feel good," he says. "You should design a life where you have that feeling of progress."
Work also has the benefit of making leisure seem sweeter, Prof. Schkade adds. This may be the reason seniors who set out solely to relax and have fun are often disappointed by their retirement.
5. We adapt to improvements.
In pursuit of progress, we strive for faster cars, fatter paychecks and winning lottery tickets.
Yet, when we get what we hanker after, we quickly become dissatisfied and soon we're lusting after something else. Academics refer to this as the "hedonic treadmill" or "hedonic adaptation."
We may, however, be able to slow the process of adaptation. If we go out and celebrate our recent promotion, we will hang onto the good feelings for a little longer. If we bought a house last year, we may recover some of the initial thrill by pausing to admire our new home.
We should also think about how we spend our money. It seems we get more lasting happiness from experiences than goods.
If we buy a new car, it will eventually go from being our pride and joy to being a scruffy set of wheels with an irritating rattle. But if we spend our money on meals with friends or vacations with family, we will be left with fond memories that may grow even fonder with time.
6. We also adapt to setbacks.
While adaptation can work against us when good things happen, it saves us from misery when bad times strike. If a close friend dies, we imagine we will never laugh again. But adaptation rides to the rescue.
Oddly enough, it seems we adjust more quickly if a setback is large or irreversible. If we become disabled, we will likely adapt with surprising speed. If our spouse is a slob, we may never get used to it.
One reason: We figure there's still a chance our spouse will change his or her slovenly ways.
7. We enjoy behaving virtuously.
If we volunteer, give to charity or behave politely, we usually feel pretty good.
Pure altruism? It may, instead, be our ancient instincts kicking in. Good behavior paid big dividends in ancient societies, notes Boston money manager Terry Burnham, co-author of "Mean Genes."
"Virtue is built into us because virtue was rewarded," he argues. "In small-scale societies, where you are well known, there are rewards for being a good citizen and severe punishments for being a rule breaker."
Still, whatever our true motivation, behaving virtuously is almost always a good thing -- and it will likely make us happier.
WHAT I HAVE SAID ALL ALONG.
MONEY DOES BUY HAPPINESS.
money doesn't buy happiness but it will rent it temporarily....
happiness is being loved unconditionally and being secure in it.
giving unconditional love brings a certain amount of happiness but without having it one will never be completely happy.
I read a book once that pointed out that happiness is the natural state of humans...that children are naturally happy, and as they grow older they learn to be unhappy...that when we are at our happiest, we aren't worrying about anything at all (like kids?)...
The question that arises is "Yes, but kids don't have bills to pay and expectations to meet, and hey, they don't need to defend their beliefs, or who they are or anything like that..."
Happiness is an agreeable feeling or condition arising
from good fortune or propitious happening of any kind.
It is the possession of those circumstances or that
state of being which is attended with enjoyment. It is
associated with good luck, good fortune, prosperity,
well-being, delight, health, safety, and love.
Happiness is generic, and is applied to almost every
kind of enjoyment except that of the animal appetites.
It ia a state of well-being characterized by emotions
ranging from contentment to intense joy. These include:
bliss, joy, joyous, carefree, jubilant, exultant,
cheerful, playful, amused, fun, glad, gay, gleeful,
jolly, jovial, delighted, euphoric, ecstatic, thrilled,
elated, enraptured, comfortable, harmonious, and
triumphant. Societies, religions, and individuals have
various views on the nature of happiness and how to
pursue it.
Only saint-like persons, who feel that they are no
longer interested in the external world, think that
happiness is within. For many persons, nothing can make
them happy. Our minds are as different as our finger
prints - no two are alike. Listening to loud music
makes one happy and makes another unhappy. Hence, there
can be no single definition for happiness. It is
probably impossible to objectively define happiness as
humans know and understand it, as internal experiences
are subjective by nature. Because of this, explaining
happiness as experienced by one individual is as
pointless as trying to define the color green such that
a completely color blind person could understand the
experience of seeing green.
As a state and a subject, it has been pursued and
commented on extensively throughout world history.
"Call no man happy till he is dead." - Aeschylus
"Happiness is a positive cash flow." - Fred Adler
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes
true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy
purpose." - Joseph Addison
"True happiness arises, in the first place, from the
enjoyment of one's self, and in the next, from the
friendship and conversation of a few select
companions." - Joseph Addison
Happiness is often associated with the presence of
favourable circumstances such as a supportive family
life, a loving marriage, and economic stability. Kali
Yuga, the age of darkness, is the time when these
favourables are difficult to find.
Unfavorable circumstances - such as abusive
relationships, accidents, loss of employment, and
conflicts - diminish the amount of happiness a person
experiences. In all nations, factors such as hunger,
disease, crime, corruption, and warfare can decrease
happiness. However, according to several ancient and
modern thinkers, happiness is influenced by the
attitude and perspective taken on such circumstances.
From the observation that fish must become happy by
swimming, and birds must become happy by flying.
Aristotle points to the unique abilities of man as the
route to happiness. Of all the animals only man can sit
and contemplate reality. Of all the animals only man
can develop social relations to the political level.
Thus the contemplative life of a monk or professor, or
the political life of a military commander or
politician will be the happiest according to their own
psyche.
The following is the self-reported positive affect
(i.e. positive emotion) during the day by 909 employed
women in USA:
Activities and their positive effect index:
Intimate relations 5.10
Socializing 4.59
Relaxing 4.42
Pray/Worship/Meditate 4.35
Eating 4.34
Exercising 4.31
Watching TV 4.19
Shopping 3.95
Preparing food 3.93
On the phone 3.92
Napping 3.87
Taking care of
my children 3.86
Computer/Email/
Internet 3.81
Housework 3.73
Working 3.62
Commuting 3.45
Interaction with partners:
w/ friends 4.36
w/ relatives 4.17
w/ spouse/Significant
other 4.11
w/ children 4.04
w/ clients/customers 3.79
w/ co-workers 3.76
w/ boss 3.52
alone 3.41
Further, happiness is not entirely psychological in
nature - it has got a biological basis too. The
neurotransmitter dopamine is involved in desire and
seems often related to pleasure. Pleasure can be
induced artificially with drugs. Use of drugs is not
some thing new, it has been used by many including
Sanyasis since millenia.
vikorr wrote:I read a book once that pointed out that happiness is the natural state of humans...that children are naturally happy, and as they grow older they learn to be unhappy...that when we are at our happiest, we aren't worrying about anything at all (like kids?)...
The question that arises is "Yes, but kids don't have bills to pay and expectations to meet, and hey, they don't need to defend their beliefs, or who they are or anything like that..."
Childhood depression exists. And they do worry, I certainly did. I was a Christian as a child, and I had to defend my beliefs from friends who laughed at them. I also had to defend my unfashionably long hair, my unusually small size, and myself from bullies.
Children are human beings, not pixies.
Agrote,
I was referring to childhood before the time before one learns about beliefs etc that need to be defended. As you grow older, people get more and more of them that they feel needs defending.
In fact, very few beliefs etc need defending at all (that's not saying no beliefs need defending).
Life is the pursuit of happiness. We all have our ups and downs, but the goal is to die happy.
At least, it is for me.