What happens when a woman gets boy cooties???
Well.
I knew a woman with boy cooties, I think I was married to her for awhile, so that kind of makes it all my fault.
At first, you know, I thought it was kind of cool to have someone around who would not only drink beer straight from the bottle, but who would turn down a girl's afternoon at the movies to stay at home with me to watch the Cowboys play the NY Giants.
And she insisted on having sex after every Cowboy touchdown with me coming at her from behind so we wouldn't miss any of the game. I didn't have any guy friends who would let me do that, so it was all good.
That is, until she entered the 'I only feel like wearing overalls and a tee-shirt today.' phase which started out being just for Sundays but pretty soon spilled over into just about every day.
Two other things happened, she stopped cooking except to go out to the backyard grill and broil a steak and some sausages. And she forgot how to go the grocery store. Really. She'd go, list in hand, but she would come back without half of the stuff, but she had thrown in a couple of big bottles of olives (they are always good, she said), a huge container of German Potato Salad and barbecued Whole Chicken. (HUh? I guess I was hungry for one.)
She got her hair cropped off short and stopped shaving her legs. She started putting the empty milk container back in the Fridge and left piles of teeshirts and overalls scattered all over the house.
Then she shut up.
I couldn't get more than two words out of her at a time.
"Is everything okay with you?"
"Yeah."
"Is everything okay with us?"
(Sourly) "Oh, here we go."
"I was just wondering if you wanted to talk about anything."
"Er, nope. I'm going to go fire up the grill."
Maybe I wasn't married to her. I remember the day I left, I was loading the car with my stuff and I looked up and there she was on the roof, fixing that shingle that had gotten loose.
Joe(She was whistling
The Dallas Cowboys Fight Song.)Nation
