Yeah! That'll Work!

The forklift: Is that bombs away?

Looks like a real one to me.

I got these pics in an email titled, "Why Women Outlive Men."

I think that forklift is a set up edgar. See the drag marks on the bitumin forward of the so called bomb?

But who picked up the forklift?

Ya mean dragged it backwards and climbed up the ramp? I doubt it. Forklifts drive on the front wheels and steer from the rear. Currently, training bombs are painted blue, I think. Ask fishin' or C.I.

Maybe a torpedo?

Back the forklift up to the loading dock. Another fork up on the loading docklifts the rear of the one below and backs away from the edge.

Easy!

A friend of mine worked in a factory years ago, some sort of food storage outfit, and the fork lift driver was temporarily distracted by a buxom lass from the office who just happened to be walking through the warehouse. The guy cranes his neck around for optimum viewing purpose, unwilling to miss a second of viewing pleasure, and, because of his lack of concentration, drove off the loading dock clean as a whistle.

He ended up breaking an arm and a few ribs and the machine required some attention.

One summer in college I worked for a construction company. On the site were contracting companies. An old, probably drunk worker from another company was operating what I can best describe a forklift that lifts it's fork pretty damn high. This jackass had the fork lifted up 15-20 feet with it's load on it, THEN adjusts the fork sideways, toppling the machine over. He fell out, the seat being a good 6-8 feet high. He turned out ok, but that may have topped the "jackass moves I've seen firsthand" chart for me.

When I was building apartments we had a forklift that reached over 15 feet. The roofers kept loading shingle pallets that fell through the roofs. Happened about four times I know of.

I drove one during an overhaul when I worked for the power plant. Place was crawling with contractors, and on of the had parked their pickup dead in the middle of ball mill alley. Everybody had to walk around it, and no vehicles could pass. In that kind of a situation, it was a big deal. Anyhow, I parked the load, angled the forks somewhat downwards, and scooted them under the rear of the pickup. I gently eased it up and rolled it forward about 30' and dropped it. Then I looked to the left, and there was the maintenance supervisor for the three units of that side of the canal. Uh oh, I thought. Then I noticed the expression on his face, and knew I was in the clear. Heck, if I'd had a bigger machine, I could have come in from the side, picked the whole thing up, and tucked it into a hole that couldn't be gotten out of without another forklift. He would probably still been grinnin' from ear to ear.

I was a journeyman machinist at the time, and have no idea why I was running a forklift.

I visited a brother working in a refrigerator warehouse. Those crazy forklift guys moved stacks of three as fast as they could, dropping 'fridges all over the place as a matter of course. I've wondered ever since then why there aren't more appliance failures.

Gentlemen--

Thank you for a rare glimpse into the conversational fodder of the Men's Lodge for Talented Men.

Oof, attorney-client privilege prevents me from discussing the kinds of junk I've seen (I used to handle construction cases), but suffice it to say a lot of people think gravity doesn't really apply to them and safety equipment is something that other people are supposed to use, not them. Ai yi yi.

One day I'm gonna drive a forklift, or sneak onto a site with one of those earth movers or wrecking balls while no one is looking. Good to know where to find a good attorney. Thanks, Jes.

Ack! Construction cases!

{runs around screaming and hitting head on walls}