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OF CHICKENS AND MEN . . .

 
 
Setanta
 
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 01:22 pm
Some men are unnerved by the terrified screams of a toddler, some by pain-lashed wimperings of a dog . . .

And some strong men are completely undone by the cacophony of the panic-stricken barnyard fowl . . .

What makes us as we are?
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Type: Discussion • Score: 0 • Views: 1,710 • Replies: 18
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edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 01:44 pm
Good question. Once, when I lived in Manhattan for a few months I was suddenly siezed by a fear of crowds. I don't know why. I took to wearing a coat that basically hid me from sight as I walked the teeming streeets. This fear gradually left me once I moved to Brooklyn. Maybe it was the hurry evident in every set of feet, maybe the epithets flung at me the time I happened on 5th Avenue right at quitting time for thousands of workers and got confused as to how to navigate through the swirling flesh. I just could not face all these strangers with their probing eyes. New Yorkers are not bashful about making critical comments to the strangers in their midst. Maybe coming there from the relative calm of cities such as Corpus Christi and Kansas City, where people walk calmly down the sidewalks. The times I revisited Manhattan I enjoyed pleasantness from the folks I met there. Just one of those unexplained chicken type phobias, I think.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 02:23 pm
I've never been galliphobic, but i'm not partial to crowds. I was born in Manhattan, when my family lived in the Bronx. I grew up in pastoral settings however, and am no lover of crowds. For those finding this dialogue too obscurantist, i offer the following:

Yer basic barnyard variety bird[/b][/color]

Having grown up among our more relaxed and affable country bretheren and cisterns, while yet preserving vague recollection of the Irish Bronx of the 1950's, i've always felt comfortable in town or in the sticks. Say to me: 'Ye ain't from around here, air ye?" an' i'll reply: "Nope, ah'm from back yonder, y'all got a problem with that?"

Say to me: "Fer chrissake, where are you from?" an' i'll reply: "Da Bronx, yuh gotta problem wid dat?"

I was in a supermarket on Azela Drive between Wilmington and Wrightsville Beach (in NC) once, awaiting my seester-in-law while she shopped for the food for which i was to pay, that we all (younguns included) go to the beach. I picked up a few odd items, and got in line to check out, the "express" line (New Yorkers beware, this word is defined differently in parts significantly south of Sandy Hook). When my turn arrived, i stood there before the not unattractive young lady in her uniform smock, with the items in my hand, saying:

Hey now, how ya doin' taday . . .

Ah'm doin' alright, how you . . .

(setting down my humble purchases)

Fahn . . . we're goin' to tha beach ! ! !

(guy behind me rattles his shopping cart--revealing, charcoal, lighter, matches, hamburger and hotdogs, buns, mustard, ketchup, tater chips, soda pop . . . Say . . . you ain't from around here, air ye?)

Ah shorely wish i could . . . it is just such a nice day

Well, hell, darlin' . . . when do you get off?

(more cart rattling, huffing and puffing through the nostrils--pretty young lady scans a few items)

Four uhclock . . . you goin' to the beach, huh ?

Yeah, we are

(dramatic sighing behind me--young lady gives pointed stare from under lowered brow . . . to no effect . . . )

Oh . . . ah see . . . $11.87, hon . . . ah'd rather not break no fifty, sug . . . what you got that's smaller . . .

(audible groan)

S'all right, here's a twinny . . . you see us at the beach, you say hey now, 'k . . .

I shorely will . . . you have a big time now . . .

An' our country kinfolk can be as pointed in their discussion of strangers as any New Yorker. The man makes his purchases, growling in a very noticeable Nort' Joisey accent, and then leaves in his huff, to go find his minivan, as the lovely little belle inquires loudly . . .

Now where you spose he's goin' in such a hurry?

Well, darlin', i'd say he's desirous of spendin' twinny thirty minits sittin' in the hot sun at that light here on Azela . . . you know, the one changes to green when they think of it?

Violent cart rattling, soft laughter from than one young gentlelady . . .

(Content warning: dialogue approximate . . . well, hell, that was twenty years ago, now, wasn't it?)
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 02:57 pm
I am galliphobic, I can't stand the French.
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edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 02:58 pm
If ya wanna see a whole subway train load of people scatter like a sack of kicked jellybeans: Once I observed a man suddenly leap from his seat and smack the door glass with his fist. The car emptied so fast I was still assimilating it from my seat as the last ass disappeared from view. The train stopped and the man disappeared out the door.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 03:09 pm
Oh God, did i laugh my ass off . . .

I got a picture of a subway car, but modified by having just read Cav's post, an' i saw a buncha Canajuns scatterin' from the car at the Spadina station . . .

heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee . . .

Glad to see you survived the experience, EB . . .
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 03:13 pm
As i have participated at this site, so my comprehension has grown, an' like the chicken when its pippin' i hope soon to take my place at your collective side . . .

Setanta's development at A2K:

http://www.enchantedlearning.com/egifs/egghatching.GIF
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 03:26 pm
"If you look into the eye of a chicken you see pure evil".....Robin, friend of Deb's and noteable chookophobe.
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cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 05:08 pm
If I want to empty the subway at Spadina these days, I go into a fake coughing fit, and THEN put on a SARS mask....works every time.
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Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 05:09 pm
heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee . . . yer a bad man, so . . .
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cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 05:15 pm
Thing is, there are always stragglers, who say crap like "yoo only kidding, yoo no have SARS...", to whom I reply "I'm not kidding, and I'm from immigration." That usually gives me a nice, crowd-free ride... OK, I am officially a bad man now...hee!
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 07:14 pm
I don't know which thread should get this. I opt for the chicken thread for obvious reasons (see avatar):
Horror
A woman, let's call her X, we had known for a long time split with her husband. He found another woman right away and moved in with her. X soon noticed my older brother drinking in a bar she frequented. Since they knew one another, it was natural they should speak. After all, not only was she a long time acquaintance; her sister and brother were married to a couple of our relatives. They met at the bar a number of times. One evening she was obviously frightened. She asked my brother to drive her home. They got in his Fiat Spyder and traveled about half a mile before stopping at a red light. At first my brother may not have noticed a three quarter ton pick up roaring along the road from behind. Before he had a chance to react, he must have realized the truck was not slowing a bit. It smashed into his car. According to the investigating officer, my brother most likely survived that crash. But, the truck backed away and came at him a second time. This time my brother's door struck a metal post. The car slid the length of the post and was flipped upside down. X was killed instantly. My brother died a half hour later. That horror was relived by my Mother every moment of every day until she died. Within a few months she became very ill. The doctor saved her, but she hovered between months of tentative well being and having to be revived by the doctors. I don't know who suffered most, my mother or my brother.
(footnote) This happened in 1969. No charges were ever filed. The DA told the man who killed these two to get out of the county.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 07:18 pm
Forgive me if i do not respond very well . . .

That was rather communicable horror . . .
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ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 07:28 pm
I am a little confused. This is the Pets and Garden forum.

Perhaps this should be in philosophy.

But, ne'er mind. Pets and Garden can use a little spirited chicken talk.

Don't know what to say, Edgar, about the truck and your brother and mother..sounds like a raging jealous guy. Horrible.

As so called Content Specialist here, I can get the topic moved if you like, Edgar, so more people can see it.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 07:31 pm
Without knowing how EB will feel about this, Osso, there is a long and screwy story behind why this thread appears here. Suffice it to say that i was lampooning myself, and hoping to provide EB a little entertainment, after which, as so often happens the thread took a different turn . . .
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 08:49 pm
That it did.
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Montana
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 08:56 pm
Edgar
I'm so sorry to hear that and angry as hell that the guy got away with it :-(
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 09:03 pm
I just read, and like, and commented on, the screwy thread. I have no idea if I should act to move this, but it makes sense right now to leave it as the obvious follow up. We'll see.

I think in a way it does fit with pets and garden, not just because dogs and other animals are mentioned, but relative to how animals can uncover our hearts.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Jun, 2003 09:10 pm
Edgar, you have described really well in very few words a complete human horror, and its impact on your mother...and you, and Cav described another horror in the earlier thread. I am less confused than I was my previous post, I don't think horror is out of place in pets and gardens, given the context.

We'll see. Maybe we'll move both topics, en groupe, to some other place. But not just yet.
0 Replies
 
 

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