Tales of Personal Failure

Skiing....
good grief. Brings to mind the time I fell twenty three times on the way down hill. I counted them, sort of, it was around that.

<smiles>


Remember, on another concurrent thread, I am bragging about hole-in-one and 270 in bowling. All of these things are true. I am a flybynight.

Oh, yeah, right!

The only "other directions" I experience from that episode, edgar, was from my uncoordinated legs, each one heading off independently of the other! And what made matters even worse was that my well intentioned students kept insisting on trying to help me improve my "technique"! Mortification, I tell you!

I had humiliating experiences trying to roller skate. My date, seeing that I could barely even stand up, asked me to hold on to her arms while I tried to get my legs. After a time, tired and unable to enjoy herself, she skated off on her own. I managed to get going around the floor, then. Every single time I passed the same point I fell down. A couple of girls loitered near the spot so they could laugh as I went I hit the floor.
It's not a personal disaster. And, off the skating floor, I was much more graceful and able than the girl I mentioned. Tradeoffs.

Roller skating! I wouldn't dream of it, edgar! You are very brave & admirable to do that!

.... then there was that time in high school when the typing teacher informed me that I had recorded the lowest score for a touch-typing test he'd ever come across! ... & suggested that I stuck to academic pursuits in future, as that's obviously where my abilities were!

I can laugh about that .... now ....

Heck, I still type with two fingers.

One finger here.

Our method can type entire manuscripts. It's not the typing skill, but the order of the words, that counts.

Yes, that's RIGHT, edgar! Absolutely!

Well, it's gotta be, doesn't it?

I'm a fairly fast typist, and there's one thing I know for sure. It's what you have to say, not how fast you can say it, that counts. And you guys do just fine! No apologies necessary.

hmm, failures.... i have to say i can't see not learning to skate or sing as a failure at all. failure is when you let someone down, someone important, often even yourself. thus it cannot be something that has to do with one's natural abilities or disabilities. when my parents were gone and i failed to study for my first big exams (end of high school - BIG deal in slovakia) and nearly flunked them, that was a failure. They know I'm reasonably smart and thus must have not studied, and I know that they know that, so their being super nice about my awful grades were even worse then if they yelled at me. that was a huge failure. Failure was when I refused to celebrate my birthday with my grandmother when I was a pouty teenager, because it was not cool, and she died that summer. i failed her, and myself, and keep feeling godawful about that.
i can't play tennis for the devil, and i do keep trying, though i should have given up long ago. but that's not a failure, i just cannot play tennis, that's all.

my failure: I sing well....but I cannot sing in front of another person/when i'm asked to sing. (my music teacher is the only exception to this rule)...my dad and husband have heard me sing accidentally - my voice comes out all flat and out of tune as soon as i realize they are listening.
In front of an audience...well, the less said the better...

I have recorded my voice quite a few times - no problems with that. My friend (who is an upcoming film music director) took me to the recording studio and recorded a portion of his new song with my voice. Knowing my problem, he kept everyone out of my sight and somehow, i sang normally that day and it came out beautifully, he said. The director heard it, was impressed and agreed to have me sing. At the next recording, I messed up completely. I was given many retakes but i couldnt manage to get one note straight. And i was rejected.

I fervently wish i could sing in front of an audience but i cant even sing in front of a couple of friends. I just continue my music lessons...but i feel like a real failure about this...!

sakhi
I feel that in time you will make a breakthrough. You are no failure, just a late starter.

Our "failures" are not necessarily actual failures. My mother's suicide, my wife's death from brain cancer, my step son's death from alcoholism, were not my faults. Yet I still felt, for awhile, that I "should" have done more to prevent them.
But I can't think of anything I might have done.
In addition, I'm not too proud of my sucesses.

Life just happens.

JLNobody--

Do you consider yourself a deliberate survivor?

Noddy, I'm not sure of your meaning. Every morning that I wake up alive, I realize that that outcome was not my doing. It just happened that way. One morning it won't.
Does that have to do with your meaning?

JLNobody--

So you're a "Survivor on Automatic" rather than an "Automatic Survivor"?

Are you more like a Human Dynamo or a Helpless Pawn of Fate?

Or neither? Actually, JLN sounds like my husband...very stoic.

thanks, edgarblythe, for the kind words...

thanks, edgarblythe, for the kind words...

Welcome
Welcome