Fiance takes me on vacation where he and ex wife got married...

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Hi all I am new here and would like some opinions on things...so me and my fiancee have been seeing each other for 3 months...he and ex wife just finalized their divorce last week. We came back from vacation yesterday and some things have been on my mind...we went to Florida...went to 3 other locations but the last place we went to was Panama City Beach where he and the ex wife got married...I don't know...something about that had been bothering me. In your opinion, does this mean he wants to create new memories in this location or is he not over his ex wife?

Thank you for reading and I appreciate all the advice or opinions.

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@Kristyn2022,

Could be that he loves Panama City Beach and goes there whenever he goes to Florida. I think you are overthinking it. If you two had a good time and he didn't talk about his ex the entire time, you are probably fine.

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Thank you.... I probably am...I guess it weirded me out a little. We did have a great time. Plus I'm just wondering if we're moving too fast. He does do things that bothers me outside of the trip. But thank you for reassuring me about this!

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@Kristyn2022,

I think this was poor judgement on his part.

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I can't believe they're engaged after/within a 3 month relationship.

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I kind of agree that it was poor judgement. I completely understand that the location in Florida is a place he goes but I feel that when you get married there and we go to places that he and the ex wife go to, to me, that's sacred. We should at least create new memories with each other.

I do agree that we getting engaged is pretty soon...though we clash, we do get along....there have been some issues along the way but we are, hopefully, getting through them. He knows I won't tolerate him continuing to flirt with women he used to be physically involved with. That's disrespectful to me.

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@Kristyn2022,

Kristyn2022 wrote:

I kind of agree that it was poor judgement. I completely understand that the location in Florida is a place he goes but I feel that when you get married there and we go to places that he and the ex wife go to, to me, that's sacred. We should at least create new memories with each other.

I do agree that we getting engaged is pretty soon...though we clash, we do get along....there have been some issues along the way but we are, hopefully, getting through them. He knows I won't tolerate him continuing to flirt with women he used to be physically involved with. That's disrespectful to me.

Some day soon, let's hope you write to us about your ex-fiancée who used to take you to places where he married his ex-wife and who used to flirt with ex-girlfriends...

...and why you are happy you got out of the rushed relationship.

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@Kristyn2022,

Question:Why did you agree to go there (where he and is ex got married) in the first place. What expectations would you have of having a good time? Where’s his consideration?

When he suggested it, your answer should have been a firm NO.

As for his flirting with others, that’s a whole other kettle of fish. An engagement after these sort of dynamics? Nahhh! That’s not going to end well. Limits need to be stated clearly.

Whether or not he’s over his expire isn’t so much the question. It’s Whether or not he’s over himself. that needs answering.

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I guess I told myself that we were going to Panama city beach to create new memories. I have let him know that he wouldn't like it if I were flirting with other men from my past so he shouldn't do it... It's disrespectful to me and to tell me he only let the girl please him orally but flirted with her in front of my face. So he told me I was right. He is aware that he's the cause to the break ups in his past relationships/ marriages. I do feel like he is trying and understanding of things. He always thinks I am trying to take charge but I know that things need to be done an I have an opinion.

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Sorry if my last post was all over the place ..I'm new to this site and trying to adjust..plus I was trying to answer some questions as well as say what's on my mind.

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@Kristyn2022,

I'm getting a bad feeling about this guy, something sounds way off. Be careful.

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@glitterbag,

Could you explain your bad vibe?

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@Kristyn2022,

Kristyn2022 wrote:

It's disrespectful to me and to tell me he only let the girl please him orally but flirted with her in front of my face. So he told me I was right. He is aware that he's the cause to the break ups in his past relationships/ marriages..

Probably this bit - plus taking you to where he and his ex got married is a bit insensitive. Telling you he only 'let' her please him orally is a disgusting thing for a 'fiancé' to tell his fiancé. Why would he share that information? And then to flirt with her?

You need to really think about what you like about this guy. If he's exhibiting this behaviour now, what will it be like later? Ugh.

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I’m seconding what Mame wrote. What he said is a showstopper. Can you not see that?

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@Ragman,

I agree, why was it necessary to tell you "oh, it was just a teeny weenie BJ..nothing really". I don't like that he's telling you you always want to be in charge, maybe you are but you really need to ask yourself if that's true. Or does he say that when you say you would rather go somewhere else, like a different restaurant. It sounds like he just pats you on your head, and tells you 'silly girl, you're being pushy..lets just do it my way'.

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You all are right... I have been weighing alot of things since seeing the girl who gave him oral( she works at waffle house)...plus I tried to let go of the fact that he sent naked photos of me and him to his ex wife ...it was to make her " regret losing him" ...at first I was mad at her and him because she told me what he did and let me know he was still married. He lied to me about WHEN they got divorced...at I mentioned in my first message ..their divorce was finalized on Aug 24th.

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@Kristyn2022,

As they say in my neck of the woods, “Oh, vey as mir!”

He has the least amount of good judgement and consideration possible. The fact that you let him take nekkid pix of you two was unwise. However his sending them to his ex, disqualified him as someone you should ever associate with.

Run away, fast!

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@Kristyn2022,

Kristyn2022 wrote:

...plus I tried to let go of the fact that he sent naked photos of me and him to his ex wife ...it was to make her " regret losing him" ...at first I was mad at her and him because she told me what he did and let me know he was still married.

Girl, what more do you need to know? He sent her naked pics of you two and she told you - she's trying to help you. Like Ragman said, get out of there! Get a decent guy or be happily single for a while.

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@Ragman,

and don't look back.

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Thank you all for your opinions and advice..I appreciate all of them and thank you for helping to reassure that the place he took me last week, places no bearings on his feelings he had for his wife.

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