9
   

My parents are forcing me to practice their religon!

 
 
saab
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 01:46 pm
@ehBeth,
Quote:
I hope more native non-Muslim Swedes reach out to assist them in their efforts.

Up until recent there were hardly any problems amongst non-Muslims and Muslims.
Lately there has been problems as well from Swedes as Muslims.
In daycentres and schools the food served should fit everybody, vegetarian, chicken, pork and lamb. Worked out very well. All of sudden in certain areas pork should not even be served. The idea spread.
Swedes tried to help intergrad non Swedes and it worked out until hardliners started to demand things which would be unfair towards Swedes and also non Swedes.
There used to a large group of Jews in Malmö - the third biggest city in Sweden - and there are fewer and fewer. Some moved to Israel, others to Stockholm or Gothenburg. Certain non Swedes have made life impossible for them to live in Malmö caused by an aggressive hate to Jews. Or maybe it is a quesstion of Palestine and Isreal.
This did not exists a few years ago.
Already 1871 the first jewish congregation started in Malmö, where 206 Jews lived.
0 Replies
 
Theunknown
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:09 pm
@saab,
I live in the United States.
0 Replies
 
Theunknown
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:13 pm
@Blickers,
I'm in the United States. I am aware that there is an option here for me to leave once I reach eighteen, but my parents won't let me work. Therefore there is no form of income for me.
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:19 pm
@Theunknown,
Will your parents let you continue your education? Learn a skill that's marketable.
saab
 
  2  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:20 pm
@Theunknown,
Are there no centers you can go to close to where you live? Or try a Christian Church - they might be able to direct you to a center.
As a start maybe you can work for a family and at the same time study. That way you have room and board and some money.
It has to be a family recommended by a serious center so you do not end
up in a mess again.
cicerone imposter
 
  3  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:28 pm
@saab,
That's an excellent idea. I left home at 17, and worked as a house boy for a couple without any children, and attended school, and lived in the wealthy section of Oakland called Piedmont. However, I didn't have any support system after I graduated, so I moved to Chicago and worked at a wholesale company as a biller until I volunteered into the USAF. That was the best decision which I should have made earlier. But looking back, things turned out very well after I worked and went to college.
Theunknown
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:34 pm
@cicerone imposter,
I have a high school education. My parents are also for me furthering to getting a college education, but I have to take college courses that they feel suitable. It's hard to explain.
Theunknown
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:36 pm
@saab,
I can look for a center in my area. There are a few churches down the street from me.
ossobucotemp
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:37 pm
Also see this earlier post by saab -

http://able2know.org/topic/335221-1#post-6235146

There may well be local shelters that can help you both as you leave and how to possibly get a job and may have ideas re schooling, perhaps starting at a community college, local or not. A lot of us worked and went to school at the same time; it's doable. Anyway, I'd check some of the centers available in your area for advice. You may want to more further away, but shelter people can help you figure it out, even an ordinary women's shelter.
0 Replies
 
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:39 pm
@Theunknown,
You're not alone; many parents require their children to go into a field they dictate. I've always told my sons to go into a field they will enjoy working in for the rest of their career. Some people change careers after their first profession. There are many options even in the same career field. Do some research; you may be surprised at the wide range of options in most fields.
0 Replies
 
ossobucotemp
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 02:41 pm
Also see this earlier post by saab -

http://able2know.org/topic/335221-1#post-6235146

There may well be local shelters that can help you both as you leave and how to possibly get a job and may have ideas re schooling, perhaps starting at a community college, local or not. Maybe at some point a scholarship, so try to keep up your grades. A lot of us worked and went to school at the same time; it's doable. Anyway, I'd check some of the centers available in your area for advice. You may want to move further away, but shelter people can help you figure it out, even an ordinary women's shelter. They are most likely in the phone directory. I know at least one friend who was not Catholic who was helped by a catholic parish crisis group - not at all about religion, but about helping people. I take that to be generally true about catholic parishes in the U.S. For where to go, though, for both a place to sleep and also get advice, I'd bet on women's shelters.
0 Replies
 
saab
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Jul, 2016 11:50 pm
@Theunknown,
Your parents would pay for a college education, but want to tell you what to study.
Take the chance, see what subjects they suggest and what the future goal they would like to set.
Agree with them...then at college, talk with your teachers and then with their help you get to study what you think will be the right thing. If college says this or that is the right thing...your parents have to give in.
Are you wearing western cloths? Or do your parents think your should wear a hijab or chador? If you wear modern western style clothing it sounds like your parents are more overprotecting than overreligious.
I am asking as we see now in Scandinavia that second and third generation sometimes have a tendency to be much stricter what clothing is concerned than first generation Muslims.

saab
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 12:50 am
@cicerone imposter,
My husband was "babysitting" a house, because the owners did not live there.
The house should not be empty.
The garden was taken care of by a Japaneese garderner. My husband talked about this wonderful garden so often. On top of it he did not have to move the lawn - like at home.
0 Replies
 
Theunknown
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 04:48 pm
@saab,
I am fully garbed. The only thing that anyone can see of me is my face and hands, other than that I have to wear this heavy head cover and a body garment that is wide and black.
0 Replies
 
Theunknown
 
  2  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 04:51 pm
@saab,
It's more complicated than that. My parents aren't paying for my college, I will be using a program to help pay for my school, but my parents will not let me attend if it's something that they don't believe in. My father already said he doesn't want my older sister and I attended an outside college, he tries to keep inside every chance that he gets. I also don't have a car, my father or mother would be taking me to my classes. If they don't I have no way of getting there.
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 05:03 pm
@Theunknown,
Is there no public transportation in your community?

In any case, go to college - regardless of how it is paid for - get out of the house and go to college. Join student groups on campus. It sounds like your parents' cultural version of Islam is quite different from what most local imams tell us is religiously supported. You will have to learn to balance your cultural practice with religious requirements.
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 05:16 pm
@ehBeth,
I second that; go to college. It can be done. I know, because we didn't have our mother's financial support to go college. We all got a college education. My older brother became an attorney, my younger brother a doctor, and my sister an RN. When my brother graduated from med school, he owed $8,000. When my nephew earned his Dentistry degree, he owed $132,000. I worked full time and went to school full time. My wife helped me in my senior year.
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  4  
Reply Fri 29 Jul, 2016 07:20 pm
@Theunknown,
Have you thought about joining the military? They will train you to do a job, and they will pay for you to go to college. Once you are 18 you are an adult; this will be your decision alone. And as soon as you go to boot camp, you will be self-sufficient (you will not be financially dependent on your parents or on anyone else).

I am sure that a military recruiter would be happy to speak with you (and your parents may wise up once you start the process). If you speak Arabic, or another in demand language, they may offer you a pretty good deal (they badly need people who can speak different languages).

My son is currently serving in the army. He is pretty happy with his decision so far.


AugustineBrother
 
  -1  
Reply Mon 8 Aug, 2016 02:06 pm
@maxdancona,
His parents are forcing him to attend services maybe but how can anyone force belief. This is like complaining my parents are forcing me to mow the lawn, eat my dinner, brush my teeth.

As to the military, my experience with kids is this : When they leave home and see that the world not only doesn't give a damn abou tthem but also abuses them they will see home as something beautiful and lost. We all of us think the world will see our excellence and right to be treated royally but we die knowing our parents treated us right.
0 Replies
 
 

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