Euphemisms

More on insanity--

Not playing with a full deck

Doesn't have both oars in the water

As crazy as a bed bug

Out to lunch

He has a full deck, he just never shuffles

Screwball
Mad as a hatter
Round the bend
Off the wall
Barking
Of unsound mind
Non compos mentis
Got a screw loose

As sane as eskimos in Gibraltar

nutty as a fruitcake

A few bricks short of a load
Not playing with full deck
A few straws short of a stack

a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

How about a few for vomiting?

the technicolor yawn
crushed tupperware
worshipping the porceline god
driving the porceline bus
kneeling without satisfaction
kneeling, but not praying
upchucking
heaving up your toenails
choking up your tonsils
the projectile spew
flushing the evidence

Mother nature is in town or here for a visit
Aunt Flo

A few fries short of a Happy Meal.

On the rag. Needs to an oil change. Plugged up. Devils curse. 
Check engine light. Somebody poisoned the watering hole. Shark week.
Riding the cotton pony. Riding the crimson wave. Red witch.
Moon time. Ladies time. Time of month. Aunt Flo's coming for a visit.
Feelin' Menstru-riffic! Taking Carrie to prom. Bloody Mary. 
Massacre at the Y. Monthly sickness. Fresh as a daisy.
Strings Attached. Closed for business. dark week. Monthly bill.
Rebooting the Ovarian Operating System.
Code red.
.... Jokes about your period aren't funny, period.