Hmm; things are very difficult for you Clary. I feel that this is worth nothing- as it is down to you, and anyone who does not know every in and out of a situation cannot make an informed judgement-, but I will tell you bits of it anyway.
Do you think that the whole incident with the younger woman (clichéd is right) was a blip, and he really loves you? Or that he thought that he could do better with someone else, and then when that failed, he wants someone else for support? The whole things sounds rather catastrophic and depressing; to expect you to forget his unfaithfulness and his breaking the trust in your marriage is unreasonable to the extreme. You have every right to remember, but I feel that things could go awry with that big yoke on both your shoulders. Could you love him after this?
It is not selfishness; it is enjoying your life for yourself. Anyone who suggests that this be selfish is telling you a mistruth. Your husband left you for someone else; he caused you to get fully-fledged independence back. He cannot expect you to, at the flip of a hat, give up the thing that he himself wrought, unless you want to, that is.
I think that the semi-detached partnership is a very good idea; it allows you to weigh your options together, rather than seeing seperation and togetherness in isolation of each other. Whatever you do, do not feel obliged to re-start the marriage because you feel that not doing so wouldn't be right; he had the marriage before he broke it. He would still be married if it were not for his course of action. Whatever you decide, follow your heart.
Aw, samoyeds! Hmm.. reindeer.
I agree with all you say.
sleigh
Sorry if I sometimes say too much, Clary. I'm glad that your deadline isn't very near; are you doing this book on your own, or are you one of many contributors?
Trondheim...
You didn't say too much, I read it thoughtfully and read it out to the now-awake son, and he said 'Gemini?' because his Gemini friends often give him a lot of advice. I liked what you said, and it helped me feel my attitude was legitimate - good to know.
Arctic Circle
Oh good... I would hate to intrude. I'm impressed at your awake-son's ability to read my zodiac sign; I never thought that it was that obvious! Any time, Clary; I'm glad that it was of some use; you deserve happiness.
Svalbard.
just an old fashioned love song
