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My poem "The Hunt"

 
 
Reply Tue 15 Sep, 2015 06:25 am
I'am not an english native person. I wrote the poem The Hunt and someoane said it is full of punctuation mistakes. Could you please point them to me? Thank you all.

I smelled your parfum
And horrified
Sensed danger in the air
I am fast alert now
You hunt me
But you don't see me yet
You try to come
And obliquely
You keep coming
I hold my breath
Petrified
Than, suddenly...
You see...
And yell a poem at me
And you think... I got it!
My heart explodes
As possessed by unnatural instincts
I simply vanish
You missed me
I am fast running, now
In complete panic
Only the noise of my heart
Surrounds me
Than, I realized
That the sound of the very moment
You yelled, to subjugate me,
Is the only sound
That echoes in my mind
...Easy... easy... easy...
But I am free
And trying not to faint
Evading faster and faster
To my secrete shelter
Far away from your verses
Poet

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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 480 • Replies: 4
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tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Sep, 2015 07:14 am
@Tabanelli,
Poetry doesn't necessarily follow normal grammatical and punctuation rules. Poetic license and all.
InfraBlue
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Sep, 2015 08:51 am
@Tabanelli,
Replace "than" with "then" in all of the instances where you've used the former.
Tabanelli
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Sep, 2015 03:02 pm
@tsarstepan,
Thank you.
0 Replies
 
Tabanelli
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Sep, 2015 03:04 pm
@InfraBlue,
Thanks
0 Replies
 
 

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