My Favorite Catalog

Forums: Catalogs, Fun Stuff, T-Rex, Extravagance
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I'm sure that most of us get catalogs in the mail. Lots of catalogs. I used to get lots. Now I get a few. Some I toss. Some I skim through. Some I examine closely. But there's only one that I keep for a while and go through again and again. My favorite. The Hammacher Schlemmer catalog. You never know what kind of novel extravagance you're gonna find. It's got nose warmers, ear warmers, hand warmers, feet warmers, and tush warmers. It's got instant Christmas trees. And a fork that will twirl the spaghetti for you. This may be for people who are lazy, clumsy, or disabled. Dunno.

But this year I'm captivated by two listings. The first is a robot. A movie star robot. It is interactive and can do all kinds of wonderful stuff. For a mere $345,000, you can have one for yourself.

The other is a full size replica of a T-rex skeleton. A mere forty feet long from tail to snout. I want this. Yes, it's $100,000. But by the time I save up enough for it (I currently have six cents in my savings account), I will have figured out the logistics. My living room is only thirty feet long. The tail will have to stick out the window. I don't know whether this violates any city codes. The bigger issue is getting my new toy into the building and into my apartment. I may have to disassemble it and bring it in bone by bone. I'll have to get a paleontologist to reassemble it. Are they expensive?

There is an alternate choice. I can get just the T-rex head for only $20,000.

I welcome suggestions. I also welcome info about other wonderful catalogs.

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Type: Question • Score: 7 • Views: 1,723 • Replies: 11

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Maybe that catalog has a shrinker, so you can get one and use it to fit the T-Rex in more comfortably.

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@edgarblythe,

Edgar, No shrinker. And I don't want a shrinker. A want the thing full size. You changed your avatar. I almost didn't know you.

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Pretty handsome, huh?

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@Roberta,

I don't get them anymore but I used to pore over the Smithsonian catalog, for clothes & stuff from far away places.

Used to like the lighting catalog from a place in Oregon, Rejuvenation Inc. I finally told them to stop; I had bought a lot of stuff from them in the past since their fixtures made sense with my last house, which I was renovating and keeping it in its old style.

I received a lot of catalogs for years from landscape design source firms. Some of those were ooh lah lah for plants, for wrought iron components, for items like copper mail boxes (I bet those get stolen), plus all the construction material catalogs. Among the most delicious catalogs were the beautifully made terra cotta pots people or granite this and that sellers; the stone yards.. the tile places.. the porphyry pavers..

sigh.
The only thing I get now is my old university magazine for alums. I still like to look through it, a quick pass.

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@edgarblythe,

Good choice. Total curmudgeon.

1 Reply

@roger,

“I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”

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I love the catalog from Mahoney's Garden Center,especially as Spring
approaches. I plan all the beautiful shrubs and flowers I will buy and plant.

And kill.

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@Roberta,

I suspect that, like most college grads, your recently certified palaeontologists are waiting tables. Put some ads up and I am sure you can get a cheap assembler.

1 Reply

@dlowan,

Give me a glue gun and a case of beer and I will put it together for free.

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Sighing and broken-hearted. I took another look at the catalog. Not only is the T-rex longer than my apartment, but it's also taller than the ceiling. I would have to rent the apartment upstairs and tear down my ceiling. Can't manage two rents while I'm saving for the hundred grand to get the skeleton. Phooey and a half.

Thanks for your responses. Osso, I used to enjoy the Smithsonian catalog. Don't get it anymore.

edgar, Should I know the face of the person in your avatar? I don't. At first I thought it bore a resemblance to Mark Twain. Now I don't know the hell it is. BTW, thanks for the glue offer. You're a good kid.

George, What I know about gardening could fit on the head of a pin, and there'd still be room enough for angels to dance on it. I was visiting a friend in the suburbs. I offered to help with the gardening. She suggested I work on getting rid of the dandelions (weeds that are easy to recognize). Weeds??!! I thought they were flowers. I'm a city kid. I'm glad you enjoy your catalog.

deb, A cheap college grad. Maybe I'll get one even without the skeleton.

Edit: I'm considering getting just the head. It'll fit.

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I searched google images for a Mark Twain pic that we don't see all the time, something that captures him from a different perspective. It certainly bes Sam Clemens himself.

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My Favorite Catalog

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